Secrets
by Zenestra
Summary: A secret from Casey's past threatens her life in the present. She throws herself into danger to keep her family safe, but will she get in too deep to save herself?
1. Chapter 1

Thanks to my lovely beta, Fayth in the Music, who beta-ed this chapter… then kind of quit on me, I'm not sure. Anyways, this story has themes of domestic violence, not-consensual incest, and rape. If any of that offends, please do not read. Also, I will occasionally do things that are not strictly grammatically correct- that's to help the story's mood and have it flow better.

Disclaimer: I own the Novaks- well, besides Casey. Everyone else is Dick Wolf's

**Note: After someone brought this to my attention, I realized I had to clarify something. This fanficiton is based off something that happened to a friend, not me. In fact, he even helped write the flashback scene in Chapter 11. Sorry for any confusion.**

**Chapter 1**

Casey took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm herself down, but it only took one look at the house to nearly send her into yet another panic attack.

"Shh, shh, calm down, girl," she tried to soothe herself, knowing that now, of all times, she could _not_ freak out. All she had to do was walk inside, take a look around, then leave. Not too dangerous. That was all she had to do... right?

"God damn it," she muttered under her breath, leaning her head against the car door. "I don't want to do this." Never had a truer statement been spoken, because God knows she didn't want to do this. No, no, _no_ she didn't. God, he could kill her. He could and she would be too damn weak to stop him. And yet, she had no choice. By going into that house, she was voluntarily offering herself up for sacrifice. Linda and Shelly had no choice in this, though. And Casey would rather die than let them suffer through the hell she had, so many years ago.

Besides, it had just been a one time thing, right? That horrifying night, it had only happened once anyway. The chances of it being repeated now were slim to none. Plus, she did have precautions to make sure it wouldn't happen again... yes, yes she did. Casey smiled coldly as she ran her hand along the slim object hidden by her shirt, stroking the cold knife like it was a fluffy kitten instead of a weapon used to kill. "Come on, girl," she tried to convince herself again, "Just a couple minutes, that's all. Then you can leave."

And then, that cruel voice in her head added on, _It's either this or two funerals._

That was all Casey needed. Buttoning up her jacket to hide her knife, Casey got out of her rental and hurried up to the house, all the while trying to resist the urge to throw up right there on the sidewalk. When she reached the door, it took almost all of her strength not to flee and, instead, raise her hand up shakily to knock.

Casey was about to jump for joy when no one answered when, just a moment later, it opened to reveal the man of the hour himself, Mark Novak. "Casey!" he exclaimed, pleasantly shocked, wrapping his strong arms around her in a hug. "What a surprise!"

As usual, it took her a few seconds to calm herself down when he touched her, to stop being afraid that he would hurt her. She even managed to return the hug, something that made her quite proud of herself indeed. "Hey, Mark," she said as she embraced him back.

Finally, he stepped back and let her breathe, and as her panic began to subside Casey looked him over. With her red hair and green eyes, Casey was an oddity of the Novak family- her father had been adopted into it, so the majority of her relatives, like Mark, had brown hair and blue eyes. He was as tan and muscular as ever, strong enough to do a pull up with only two fingers. "So, what brings the great prosecutor back down to my humble abode?" he asked, smiling at her. "Got any more stories where you throw the badasses in jail to tell me?"

She shrugged, trying not to think about the irony of the situation. "Oh, sure, sure, I always do," she said as he stepped back, allowing her to come inside. She looked around, inspecting her surroundings closely, but she could not see any signs of a fight. She gave a sigh of relief before getting to the real reason of her visit. "But hey, are Shelly and Linda here? I feel like I haven't seen them in forever!"

Mark laughed and rolled his eyes. "Oh, there we go, the ulterior motive! Casey Novak would never come see her big brother unless she wanted to discuss, hair, boys, or makeup with my wife and daughter!" Casey blushed and pretended that he was right, because if they weren't here, she needed to get out of here, and now. "Shelly, Linda!" he called loudly. "Get down here, you'll never guess who's here!"

Casey turned to the stairs, keeping one hand resting on the hidden knife, using its cool temperature to calm her. They were going to be fine. They had to be.

Two people came down the stairs, one a woman, one just a little girl. The woman was short, petite, with soft brown hair and eyes and a hesitant smile. She looked like... well, as much as Casey hated to admit, the average victims she spoke with in her office.

The sling she wore on her arm didn't help much, either.

Next was the child, with her mother's good hand rested protectively on her shoulder. She was almost an identical twin to Linda, though she took after her father and had cool blue eyes instead of brown. She was quite thankful that Shelly took after her mother for almost everything besides her eyes- with curly, light brown pigtails and pale skin, many people always called her an angel. Casey herself was guilty of that.

Of course, angels don't normally have black eyes.

"Oh! Linda, Shelly!" Casey exclaimed, trying to hide her horror. "What happened?"

Linda glanced quickly at her husband before she said meekly, "Car crash. I was driving Shelly to school when a taxi hit us."

_Oh god no, he hit them, he hit them both and it's my fault, oh god, everything, now, everything is my fault, no no no!_ Casey tried desperately to keep her expression neutral, though she knew what had to be done now. She had only one choice. "Oh, that's not good," she said lightly, trying and probably failing to give them a lighthearted smile. "Well, actually, here's the real reason for my impromptu visit, Mark- I, uh... Well, one of my friends gave me his cat to look after for a couple days, and it turns out, my apartment building has a no pets policy. I got evicted last night."

Mark's eyes widened in concern, though Linda didn't even look up. Shelly was rooted to the spot next to her mother and didn't look like she'd be moving any time soon. "Oh, Casey, that's terrible!" he exclaimed, taking a step towards her. She almost fainted in terror at that. "Where are you going to stay?"

She forced herself to smile as she said, "Well, uh... I was sort of hoping that I could, you know... stay here?" The words made her want to throw up, but they had to be said. His response made her want to run screaming from the room.

"Oh, Casey, of course you can. You're my baby sister." He gave her a light hug, then said, "I'll go make up the guest room for you."

He turned and headed up the stairs. As he passed Linda and Shelly, it was impossible for Casey not to notice them both shy away and the pure terror in the little girl's eyes as he brushed past her, barely touching her shoulder. With a guilty moan, Casey collapsed onto the couch, already exhausted just _thinking_ about the coming months. "Linda, Shelly," she murmured, beckoning to them. "Over here."

Shelly didn't move until her mother started walking towards Casey as well. She could see the horror in Linda's expression, and she knew exactly where it was coming from. _Well, too bad, Linda. This is my mess to clean up, not yours. I won't let him hurt you again. _Linda sat down next to her, keeping her distance, and Shelly clung to her mother's side until Casey reached over and gently took her hand, giving her a soft smile. "Hey, Shelly," she murmured. "Its okay, I'm not going to hurt you. I promise."

The little girl just looked at her, then nuzzled her head into the crook of Casey's arm and curled up beside her, closing her eyes immediately. Casey blinked as hot tears started to make her way down her cheeks, and it was then that she realized that Shelly hadn't even spoken a word since she had arrived. _Poor girl, she must be exhausted… and terrified._

Then she looked back up at Linda and hurriedly wiped her tears away before saying, "Listen, Linda... I know you weren't hit by a taxi. I know it was Mark." At first there was pure shock on her face, and Casey quickly continued before Linda had even processed that, knowing that she didn't have much time. "I am staying with you from now until you can get a divorce. I can stop him from hurting you or Shelly, I promise. Now-"

"But- but, Casey- how did you-"

"Come on, Linda, keep up," Casey said, snapping her fingers. "We don't have much time until Mark comes back."

The younger woman stammered hesitantly, eyes wide with shock, "Wait! M- Mark said, if I got a divorce, he would take Shelly!"

Casey had suspected as much. "I know, come by my office tomorrow at noon so I can tell you my plan, we don't have much time." This was the harder part of the conversation, what she really didn't want to say but that she knew was required. She had planned this for a while, now, but only worked up the courage to come see if it was necessary today. It was her fault he was doing this and she wasn't going to allow two innocent victims get hit when she was a perfectly good target for his rage. "Now, listen, I know its difficult, but when Mark attacks you, scream. That's all you have to do, and I _will_ come, and I _will_ keep you safe- I promise. Just take Shelly and get her out of the house until the next day. All right?"

"But... Casey, I... how... when did you-"

"Casey!" Mark called from upstairs, interrupting Linda's shocked question. "The guest room's ready!"

Casey immediately stood up, being careful not to disturb Shelly, and murmured to Linda, "You must promise me you'll do this! Its okay, trust me. Please, promise me!"

Linda stared at her in complete shock, then slowly managed to give an amazed nod. "Good," Casey whispered before standing up and walking away, not sure how Mark would react if he saw the three talking. She heard Mark coming down the stairs and nodded reassuring at Linda before turning to face the abuser. "Hey, Mark. Thanks for letting me stay here, I really appreciate it."

He shrugged. "It's no problem- Linda, would you mind putting Shelly to bed? It's late and, quite honestly, she should have been asleep an hour ago."

All this was said with a smile, and Casey wasn't sure whether or not she imagined the fear in Shelly's voice when she replied, "Sorry, Daddy."

Mark smiled and ruffled his daughter's hair. "It's okay, kiddo." Linda took Shelly's hand, then, and led the sleepy girl upstairs. The moment they were gone, Mark turned to face Casey, still smiling. "Hey, Case, listen... would you mind making sure Shelly doesn't know about your work? I mean, she's a little young, and I don't think stories about child molesters or-"

"Oh, Mark, of course not! I'm not an idiot, I would never tell her stuff like that!" Casey exclaimed, all the while trying not to realize the irony. "Don't even think that," she said softly before picking up the sports bag she had dropped off by the door. "Thanks for taking me in like this, Mark, I really appreciate it."

"Shush, you," he said fondly, tousling her hair. "You're my little sister, Casey, so trust me when I say its not a problem."

Casey smiled, then forced herself to give him a light hug, though she was already falling for his sweet, innocent brother act all over again. "Well, all right," she said doubtfully, then pulled back and continued, "but I didn't get any sleep last night, so would you two mind if I just went up to bed?"

"Oh, not at all," he said and started leading her upstairs. "Why didn't you get any sleep last night?"

Casey hesitated briefly before saying simply, "Oh, you know, the job. My detectives needed an emergency warrant."

Mark just rolled his eyes and nodded. "Well, you go on up to bed now. Call me if you need anything." Casey nodded her thanks, but the moment he had left and the door to her new room was shut, she slumped against the wall, closing her eyes against the tears.

God, she had known. She had known when he got his first girlfriend after that night that it was dangerous. How many women had been beaten or raped over the years because she had been too terrified to speak up? God, how many lives could have remained sweet and carefree if she had just stayed and protected them? All her fault... all her fault...

SVU SVU SVU

Whether it was just luck or the gods smiling down upon her, she did not know, but nothing happened that night. She didn't hear any sounds from Linda indicating that something might be wrong- and Casey had gotten up to check several times, knowing from personal experience how hard it was to call for help in that situation, but Linda and Shelly were both safe… well, as safe as they could be under the circumstances.

Casey, though, exhausted as she was, had not slept. As a child, she had known how dangerous it was to sleep while he was awake, but had done so anyways, unwilling to admit the stupidity of her actions, denying that anything was wrong. Now, though, she could not allow herself to deny anything. Denial could get Linda or Shelly killed.

So she walked down the stairs, a bright smile on her lips, pretending to be carefree. "Good morning, Mark," she said as she walked into the kitchen. "Linda, Shelly." Linda was fixing breakfast while Shelly ate quickly, and Mark was drinking a cup of coffee while he read the paper... the perfect picture of a family. All it needed was a white picket fence and a son for Mark to play catch with and Casey could deny the past again and trust him.

"Hey, Casey," Mark said, glancing up from the paper and smiling at her.

Linda shot a smile at her over her shoulder and Shelly kept her eyes fixated on the plate before her. Casey was starting to think that Mark had told her not to talk with adults- he didn't want her spilling 'family' secrets, like the fact that he beat both his wife and daughter most every night. Well, that was going to stop soon. "Morning, Casey. Can I fix you something?" Linda asked from over by the stove.

It almost broke Casey's heart that the woman was able to show kindness to her, after everything she had gone through because Casey hadn't warned her about the dangers of marrying Mark. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she shook her head and said, "No, that's okay, I'm going to pick up something on the way to work." She gave Linda a meaningful look at that, hoping that she remembered to meet her at her office before starting to sort through the papers in her briefcase, pretending to be searching for something. In reality, she was just waiting for Linda and Shelly to leave so she could leave herself.

Finally, Linda stood up and took Shelly's hand, nodding at her. "Time to go to school, Shelly."

The little girl immediately hopped down off the chair to the ground and nodded. "Okay. Hey, Mommy, can I go to Lindsey's house after school? She promised me that I could play with her dolls and then she said that she had a real shiny one named..." Shelly's voice trailed off as she walked out of earshot, and Casey was unable to resist a smile- she still seemed so... childlike, even after everything she had been through. God... it was so unfair that the innocence of these years had been stolen away from her.

With a heavy sigh, Casey closed her briefcase and got to her feet. "Well, I've got to go to work. I'll see you later tonight?" she asked Mark, wishing the answer was no though knowing it would be yes.

And, sure enough, he nodded and said, "Yep." He put his and Shelly's dishes in the sink, then got up and followed her out. Casey knew he was just going to work, too... but the fact that he was behind her... and bigger than her, and stronger... frankly, it terrified her.

Finally, when she was safely inside her rental with all the doors locked, Casey let out a heavy sigh of relief and started driving. She felt the, by now, familiar pang of nausea in her stomach but shook her head, tightening her grip on the wheel. No, no, not yet. She had to make it to work. She couldn't get sick yet.

Thankfully, she didn't have court today, so she could go straight to her office. Once there, she knew she had a good four hours before Linda would come by. That was four hours for her to use to break down. Sleep was not an option. She had to get _everything_ done at work now- there wasn't a very big chance she'd get to finish up anything at home. Not anymore.

So, while tears slowly trickled down her face, she started working, trying not to make any noise so as not to attract attention. There were periods of time when she was able to focus on the papers in front of her and not let her thoughts get distracted by images of Linda and Shelly being beaten by her own brother, but, most of the time, she was struggling not to just fall apart and start sobbing. And, of course, the nausea was so bad that, sometimes she actually did throw up into the trash can beside her desk.

Unfortunately for her, Olivia walked in right when she was throwing up, her face still streaked with tears. She stood there in shock for a second, then rushed over to her, kneeling down beside her in concern. "Casey?" she asked in bewilderment, holding back her hair gently as Casey emptied the contents of her stomach- hell, she hadn't even eaten anything in the past twenty four hours, what on earth was there to throw up?- into the trash can. When she was done, Casey scooted away and leaned back against her desk weakly, still trembling as she averted her eyes from Olivia's concerned gaze. "Casey?" she asked again. "What's the matter?"

She just shrugged, knowing that admitting the truth was not an option. "I'm... I'm just..." she panted, trying to search for an excuse. "I'm just fighting off a stomach bug, that's all."

Olivia shook her head, unconvinced. "Well, you shouldn't be at work if you're this sick..."

Casey glanced up at her and tried to smile. "Well, you know me. Workaholic," she offered lamely. Olivia frowned and was about to ask another question when Casey asked one of her own. "So, Detective, what can I do for you?" she asked as pleasantly as possible while she pulled herself up into her desk chair. "Warrant?"

Olivia frowned again, then said, "Casey, you're not avoiding this discussion. Wasn't it _you_ who said just last week that you would only take off work if you're throwing up? Well, you're-"

"I didn't say that I _would_ take off work, I just said that that was the only _reason_ I would. Look, Olivia, I really do have a lot of work to do, would you mind just..." she trailed off when she saw a man in the hallway. It wasn't Mark, it couldn't be. But... but it looked just like him... no, no, _no!_ Casey fought for each breath as she examined him carefully, and _god_ every feature she could see looked exactly the same and, in her already weakened state, it was too much for Casey and she collapsed sideways out the chair, falling to the floor in a heap.

Olivia hurried forward, immediately getting down beside her. "Okay, that's it, Casey, I'm taking you home. You still live in-"

"No!" she exclaimed fiercely before she started coughing. As Casey once again found herself in a struggle for each breath, her eyes caught sight of the clock in the wall- it was noon. _Oh, god, Linda!_ Immediately pulling herself back up towards her desk in alarm, Casey pulled a sleeve across her mouth and tried to compose herself. "Look, Liv," she said, her voice hoarse, "I promise, I'm fine. Now, I have a meeting that's supposed to be happening right now, so-"

At that moment, Casey's office door opened and Linda stepped inside. She kept her eyes glued to the floor and her good arm was held tightly to her side. Now, Olivia may have been completely in the dark as to what was going on, but that didn't mean she couldn't recognize a battered woman when she saw one. She immediately saw the telltale signs, which didn't really surprise her- Casey was, after all, a sex crimes ADA... but Olivia didn't recognize the victim from any of their cases.

"Casey?" she asked in surprise, looking the woman up in down. "Who is this?"

The woman looked up and, when she saw the detective, she immediately backed away and said, "Oh, Casey, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you weren't alone- I'll just go and-"

"No, you won't 'just go'." Casey got to her feet and took the woman's hand tenderly, pulling her back inside her office. "Detective Benson was just leaving." Casey gave Olivia a cold look and nodded at the door before sitting back down at her desk across from Linda.

Olivia stared at them both for a second before slowly backing away towards the door. "Right... Casey, I'll call you about the warrant later," she said before heading out, wondering what on earth was up with the ADA.

As soon as the door was closed, Casey turned towards Linda with a small smile. "Hey, Linda. Sorry about that. Anyways, since you have to leave to pick up Linda at two thirty, I'll be brief: if you divorced Mark now, he would still have a right for custody with Shelly. Even if I had him arrested on assault the next time he attacked you, it wouldn't be enough- as horrible as this sounds, unless he used a weapon, he'd get slapped with a misdemeanor. That's just one year in prison, at the _most_, Linda… and Shelly's only five. And, trust me when I say this, the courts would not be kind to you just because your husband was abusive. There's no telling which judge you got for your case- in fact, I know a couple who would make Shelly visit with her father simply because of your last name: they don't really like me." Linda was about to interrupt when Casey raised her hand like a traffic cop, shaking her head. "Wait up a sec, I have a plan. While assault wouldn't get him in jail long enough... attempted murder would." Casey took a deep breath before continuing on with her next proposition, because there was no way in _hell_ she was going to sit idly while Linda got hit. She was going to use sleep deprivation to dull her emotions to get through this meeting and deal with her fear later; this was her only option. "Now, I'm willing to take the beatings for you, but when one of them is bad enough to be called attempted murder, it will most likely put me in the hospital. Even then, don't tell the police. I'm a lawyer, I'll know when one of them is bad enough to be classified as attempted murder. But, until then-"

"Wait, Casey," Linda interrupted quickly, eyes wide with shock. "Wait. Mark... he's _my_ husband, and... and you can't- I can't allow you to take... I can't allow him to _hit_ you and do nothing! I..."

"You won't be doing nothing," Casey assured her. "Whenever Mark attacks you, just scream. I _will_ come, I promise, I'll trade places with you- you, however, _have_ to get Shelly out of that house until the next day. And the reason we can't switch roles is because, first of all, you're Shelly's mother. Right now, you're the only person she trusts, which is understandable- so she wouldn't go with me without a fight for a long while. Also... Linda, I've dealt with him before. I can handle him. He won't kill me. He'll reign himself in before I'm dead. You... I'm not so sure of."

Linda continued to stare at her in complete shock for a moment, then stammered, "B- but Casey, I... I c- can't... h-how... how did you know? I m-mean, I n-never told anyone..."

"Shh," Casey said softly, shaking her head. "It's okay, don't worry about that now. Just... promise me that you'll scream. Trust me, I've been there, I know it hurts, but... you have to. Please."

Linda hesitated a moment longer, shaking her head as she said, "But, Casey, you don't have to do this- this is my daughter, my husband, you shouldn't get hurt just because-"

"Linda," she interrupted, reaching across the desk to take the young woman's hand into her own. "This is my choice. You haven't coerced me in any way. Please don't feel guilty about this. It's for the greater good. It will keep Shelly safe and no one will die. Please, Linda."

Finally, she agreed. "I... all right. But Casey, if you, at any time want to back out of this, you can. By all means, don't stay with us out of some fake belief of duty."

Casey nodded, satisfied, though dreading the months to come. "Of course. Now, Linda, one more thing before you go... did Mark... did he ever... okay, this may be too personal a question, but did he ever ra... did he ever ra... rape you?"

Linda blinked, shocked. "I... no. No, he hasn't. Casey, why-"

"No time for questions," she said, forcing a smile. "Come on, if Mark found out you were here, can you imagine what'd he do? Hurry now, head back over to your job. I'll be home in your home at 2:30 sharp. I promise." Linda continued to stare at her in confusion as she got up and left. The moment the door was closed, Casey leaned back with a sigh of relief. Easy part done, impossible stuff left to tackle... sounded like her normal, typical day. Without the life-threatening bastard waiting for her, of course.

Please review


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to Fayth in the Music and Kimblee Whitehead for reviewing. We're working out the DocX issue right now, and I already have chapter 3 back. So, yes, that means quicker updates.

**Chapter 2**

Casey had just changed out of her work clothes into her pajamas- a tanktop and shorts- when there was a loud crash, and a feminine scream... which meant... Linda. Without a second thought, Casey dashed out of her room and down the hallway to Mark and Lindas' bedroom and rammed through the locked door.

The sight in front of her caused her to scream as a similar scene from the past flashed before her eyes, the flashback so bad that it should of been impossible to function. But, years ago, Casey had trained herself to work during flashbacks, to maintain an image of normality, so she managed to dive forward and force herself into the wrestling match currently going on on the floor, trying to rip Mark's hands off Linda. He backhanded her before returning to holding down his wife, and, in her current state, that caused another scream to be torn from the ADA's lips before she jumped up on Mark's back. The unexpected weight was too much for him and he collapsed onto his stomach, right on top of Linda. With a fierce, animalistic growl, he rolled over to the side so he was on top of his sister and not Linda. Linda scooted back, panting heavily and staring at the pair in shock.

"Go!" Casey shouted before Mark gripped her thrashing arms in one hand and pinned them above her head. "Get Shelly and _run!_" Linda hesitated for a moment longer, but Casey caught a glimpse of the little girl in the hallway, staring at the scene in shock. Mark was too focused on the struggling body beneath him, but Linda must have seen her too, because she dashed away, leaving Casey fighting for her life.

This time, she didn't know how long the fight lasted. How long she struggled underneath him, trying desperately to escape his iron grip, but she was nothing underneath him. He squeezed, making her ribs hurt, her body crying out, and she would of screamed in pain if she'd had the air. The seconds seemed to both fly by and take an age, all at once… But, finally, he released her bruised, broken body and allowed her to huddle up against the back wall, gasping for breath as she tried to overcome the shock of what had just happened. "That," he growled in her ear, grabbing her by the hair when she flinched back, "is what happens when you try and stop me." He let her fall to the floor then as he fell back into bed, the exhaustion of the physical exertion finally catching up with him. Casey, the adrenaline of the fight keeping her from relaxing, tried to stand, but her legs simply wouldn't have it. With an agonized groan, Casey pulled herself across the floor, inch by inch, until she was outside of Mark's room.

Ignoring the reality of what had just happened, Casey knew that she needed to get to a hospital and she had to call Linda. But her car... god, her car was _all the way_ outside. And, more importantly, she had to make it down a flight of stairs. She tried to stand again, biting back a scream as she collapsed once more and tumbled down the stairs, landing with a loud- and painful- thump on the carpeted floor.

"Ow!" she grunted once she had her breath back, blinking blearily as her vision turned red. Okay, she had to get to a hospital _now_. Once again, Casey started pulling herself across the floor, only to remember her keys, wallet, and phone were all in her room.

Which were upstairs.

Well, calling an ambulance was out of the question, that would cause questions. And there was no way in _hell_ she was going to go back up those stairs again. She also wasn't going to call Linda to come and get her via the phone in the kitchen. Too risky. Mark might try to finish what he started.

But she could call someone else.

Mentally going through the numbers she had memorized as she pulled herself to the kitchen, Casey quickly came up with a very short- and rather unhelpful- list: SVU and Judge Donnelly. Well, Liz was an automatic _no_- there was no way in _hell_ she could carry Casey out, and she would ask to many questions. Olivia, though she was her first choice, was also a no- she had seen her sick earlier today and would be suspicious. Elliot had a family, no way in hell was she going to drag him out here. Munch would be suspicious of any story she came up with, period. Fin saw her as like a baby sister and would be too protective of her and start asking questions. So, she had one person left, who she barely even knew- Cragen. She closed her eyes, trying to decide whether she should go with him or just try and pull herself outside and call for a taxi.

Wait a minute… damn it, he lived across the street. She had picked him up once on her way to the courthouse and given him a ride; she remembered being terrified that it was so near Mark's place. If she called a taxi, there was always the chance that he could see and interrogate her about it later. However, if she just decided to go with Cragen now, she could do damage control and make up some lie about an abusive boyfriend or whatever- plus, Mark was probably still awake. He would hear a car pull up in front of the house, but if she had Cragen just walk over, he wouldn't hear a thing.

So, she pulled herself up into a chair in the kitchen and grabbed the phone, panting from the effort, and called Cragen's home phone number. It had almost gone to voicemail, which, given the current situation, would have probably made her burst into tears of despair, when a voice picked up, one that she wasn't expecting.

"Cragen's residence, can I help you?"

"Munch?" she gasped, in such shock she almost forgot to keep her voice down. Almost, but not quite. "Munch! What the hell are you doing at Cragen's place?"

"My apartment's being fumigated, I needed a place to stay. Cragen's still at work, you should probably try his cell, Case, though I-"

"Wait..." she interrupted, biting her lip, uncertain if she should just go with Munch instead of waiting for Linda and Shelly to get back. But when she coughed and blood splattered across the table, she knew that that wasn't an option. "Wait, Munch, I... I could use your help."

The desperation in her voice must have alerted him to the seriousness of the situation. "Casey?" he asked, half-curiously, half-uncertainly. "Where are you right now?"

"I'm across the street from Cragen's house. 273. And, if you don't mind picking the lock for me, that would be so nice."

There was a moment of hesitation before Munch replied, "I'm on my way... Casey, what's going on?"

She hesitated for a heartbeat before simply saying, "I'll tell you when you get here. And, please, be quiet." With that, she hung up, trying to figure out what the hell she was going to tell Munch to explain what she was doing here.

Finally, she heard the front door open, and then she realized... _oh_ _god, he's going to touch me. I'm going to feel his hands, his fingers, his touch on my skin. On my bare skin. Oh, god it's going to burn... _I _might scream, and then Mark- oh, shut up, Casey!._ She struggled to control her breathing, extremely grateful for the fact that she was still in shock and using that to stop from either a, bursting into tears or b, fainting from the horror of it all.

"Casey?" the detective called softly. "It's John, where are you?"

"Kitchen," she said, trying to not turn it into a moan.

Munch hurried after the sound of her voice, and Casey was glad he wouldn't be able to see her too well without the lights on. All he could see was a figure who looked and sounded like the ADA... not the bruises that probably decked her body.

"Casey?" he asked in alarm. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," she said, trying and failing to smile. "I just need a ride somewhere." She planted her hands on the tabletop and tried to stand up. She actually made it and was just regretting her decision to call for help when her legs gave out, and Munch caught her moments before she hit the floor.

"Casey!" he gasped in shock, gently turning her over so she was on her back and laying her down on the floor. "Casey, you- are you-"

"I'm fine," she panted through gritted teeth. "Can you... can you just please help me out to your car?"

Munch hesitated, still watching her in great concern, before he gingerly took her hand and helped her upright. Though it wounded her pride, Casey was forced to lean on him for support, which only prompted more concern from Munch. "Case," he asked urgently as he helped her outside, "what _happened_ to you? Clearly, this is not nothing."

She just shook her head and said, "Wait until we get to your car... then I'll tell you." She was putting it off mostly because Casey had no idea what she was going to tell him. Honestly, what was the likelihood he would believe anything besides the truth? What was the likelihood that he would believe even that?"

Well, Munch was probably expecting something like an abusive boyfriend. Might as well give him what he was thinking and hope it passed itself off as the truth.

Once Munch had finally gotten her settled in his car, he hurriedly started the engine and informed her, "Case, I'm driving you to the hospital. Now. Don't even bother trying to argue because it won't work."

She grinned weakly and rolled her eyes at him.

"Don't worry, Munch, I was going there anyway... well, I know you're thinking, so ask."

He immediately turned to her with a fierce glare and demanded, "What the hell happened, Casey? Who did this? Was it your boyfriend? I'll kill him, don't worry about that, Casey, I'll break his-"

"Oh, Munch, slow down there," she said quickly, trying to appease him. She knew that if Munch went storming into that house, gun or not, Mark could do a hell of a lot more than take him. He could probably beat Munch into unconsciousness. And she would _not_ be responsible for yet another preventable assault. "It was my boyfriend, but its not what you think. We were in a car crash."

He frowned, looking at her suspiciously and not buying her act.

"And what, he just left you there, alone? I don't think so. I also don't think you were in a car crash _inside_. After we get finished at the hospital I'm going over to that little thug's house and-"

"Munch!" she exclaimed, glaring at him. "You will not! Do you know who that man is? He's Mark Eldridge! The CEO of that record company! If you threatened him, he'd have your badge!" she invented quickly, hoping he wouldn't wander why this CEO was living in a suburban neighborhood and not a penthouse or a mansion. "Look, I promise I'll break up with him, but don't threaten him, Munch!"

She watched him carefully, praying he wouldn't pick up on the many inconsistencies in her story. Finally, he said, "Fine. But you won't mind if I don't trust you on this and call SVU on down to the hospital."

"No!" she exclaimed in alarm, eyes widening in fear. "No, Munch, don't! I'll be okay, really! If it makes you feel better, you can be there when I dump him, but please, Munch! Don't call SVU!"

He hesitated, still uncertain, then said adamantly, "I'll call Olivia. But no one else. You are staying with her for the next few days in case this thug comes back, and we are breaking up with him tomorrow."

Casey, despite the direness of the situation, was a little touched- and amused- when she heard him say '_We_ are breaking up with him'. But she didn't have time for emotion right now. "Fine, go ahead and call Olivia. And I'll stay with her tonight- but tomorrow, I'm back at my place."

Munch just shook his head as he pulled up outside the emergency entrance of the hospital and stopped the car, hurrying around to help her out.

"We'll see about that. Now, you go on in and get yourself checked out. I'm calling Olivia," he told her as he walked her slowly inside, keeping her upright. Casey was beginning to get some of her strength back and she was able to hobble a few feet under her own power. The nurse at the triage took one look at her bruised body before sending her to an exam room, and the moment she was out of Munch's sight, she let out a heavy groan and smacked a hand against her forehead. Why the _hell_ had she said he could watch her break up with him? There was no one for her to break up _with!_ And now Olivia and Munch would be after her every time she showed up with bruises or broken bones, which would probably be happening a lot in the next several months... god damn it, things could not possibly get any worse, could they?

And, of course, she was proven wrong, when a _male_ doctor walked into the room. Of course, she knew it didn't really matter. The first time this had happened, she had been able to handle men touching her, occasionally- whether or not she panicked depended on her state of mind at the time. Still, she didn't like males touching her. It made sex pretty god damn awkward, but still, it was true.

"Good evening, Ms...?" The doctor asked as he snapped on a pair of latex gloves.

"Novak," she said quickly- if this happened again, and it would happen again, she was going to have to lie about her surname, to avoid SVU getting called in because a woman showed up every day in the ER, looking like she'd been run over by a truck… but Munch was out there. If she used a false name this time around and he somehow found about it, it would only lead to questions she couldn't answer, like what the hell was really going on- and she couldn't afford any of the detectives to be suspicious of her now. Because they recognized the signs of battered woman, and she couldn't have them thinking she was one.

The doctor nodded and said, "Well, Ms. Novak, I would ask you what the problem was, but I think that's pretty obvious. Can you walk?" Casey hesitated, then shook her head and looked away, blushing from the embarrassment. He nodded. "That's fine. Let me go get a wheelchair and I can take you to get you X-rayed." He was gone before Casey could protest, but he had given her an idea.

Munch and Olivia didn't need to see her break up with Mark. They needed to see her break up with somebody. And if she paid this doctor enough money, he would probably turn into a nice little actor for her.

So, as he was wheeling her to radiology, Casey took a deep breath and asked slowly, "So, Doctor... would you mind doing something for me?"

He frowned at her tone of voice, then said slowly, "That depends on what it is. Nothing illegal or involving guns or something."

"Oh, nothing like that. See, my friends... well, very long story sort, my friends need to see me break up with a rich guy named Mark Eldridge. The problem is, I'm not dating a rich guy named Mark Eldridge. So... how much money would it cost to make you become my rich boyfriend, if only for five minutes?"

The doctor looked down at her in confusion, then said slowly, "Well, I don't like how this sounds... could cost a few hundred. You up for that?"

Casey groaned, and was about to say no, she would find somebody else... but... aside from medical costs, she would be living off Mark's paycheck for the next couple of months. She supposed she could spare a few hundred. "Would three hundred be enough?" she asked with a sigh.

"Oh, that's great!" he said with a smile before pushing her into the X-Ray room. "I get off work in half an hour- are these friends of yours here now?" She nodded, so he continued, "Good. I can get changed and go out to the waiting room, you 'break up' with me, then pay me. In cash, right? I don't want a check." 

Casey gave another loud groan, then nodded. The doctor sighed in satisfaction, then went over to the other side of the room while a nurse helped her get on the table and covered her with a lead sheet. Casey bit back a whimper when the heavy plate was draped across her chest and her ribs burned in protest, and the nurse gave her a sympathetic look and said, "It's to protect from the radiation, dear."

_Yeah, as if I didn't already know that! And I'm not a child, don't call me 'dear'!_ Casey sighed and lay her head back, closing her eyes against the loud noise of the machine.

As it turned out, her legs were fine, she had just been shaky after the fight. However, she had broken three ribs and had cracked another, and her left shoulder was dislocated. Casey closed her eyes tightly as the doctor put bandages on her ribs and her arm in a sling, trying her best to fight off memories of the last time she'd been sitting on an exam table because of Mark, but failed miserably.

God, Munch and Olivia were going to go ballistic. She probably should of mentioned to the doctor that two detectives were probably going to threaten him, but somehow, she didn't think he would agree to that.

"Okay," the doctor said as Casey put her shirt back on, "as long as you don't participate in any strenuous physical activity for the next couple of weeks, you should be fine... now, about this break up thing... when and where? And I want to be paid in advance."

Casey rolled her eyes, then said, "You know, if I really wanted to find a guy named Mark and date him, all so my friends could see me break up with him, I would. You're lucky I'm using you. And I'll come back in a couple of hours and pay you- but I don't have my wallet with me right now. And we're doing this here and now. Go get dressed in your suit and head out to the waiting room. Then I'll come out, we start fighting, eventually, you leave. It's that simple."

The doctor hesitated, then nodded.

"Fine," he said. "But if you don't pay me, I'll charge you an extra thousand for the ER visit by saying you took an ambulance. Got it?"

Casey sighed at his theatrics- and the fact that what he was suggesting was illegal- then waved him on.

"Yeah, yeah, I got it. Now, hurry up! I have to be at work soon."

After waiting ten minutes for the doctor to get dressed and be in position, Casey got to her feet gingerly and headed out into the waiting room. Sure enough, her doctor was waiting in a chair that just happened to be next to a worried looking Munch and Olivia. "Mark!" she shouted, pretending to be surprised. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Her doctor got slowly to his feet and walking over to her, feigning confusion. "I'm waiting for you, darling- what, did you think I would just leave you alone in the hospital? You're my girlfriend!"

Munch and Olivia both got up to stand protectively by her side as she snapped, "Yeah, try _were_, you loser! You're the whole reason I'm even _in_ the hospital in the first place! What, did you think I would stay with a guy who beat the hell out of me?"

Her doctor was clearly surprised- apparently, he wasn't supposed to be an abusive boyfriend. But, he took it in stride- must really want that three hundred dollars... _pathetic loser. _"Yeah? Well, maybe I wouldn't beat you up if you didn't cheat on me!"

"Cheat on you- you bastard, I never cheated on you! And you're one to talk, with all those whores giving you lap dances at clubs! And then you always say afterwards, 'Oh honey, that's just for physical enjoyment, but I _love_ you!' Oh, give me a break, Mark! Sorry, but I don't want to date someone who thinks it fun to cheat on me and beat me up! We are fuckin over!"

"Good!" Mark shouted back. "Good, because I don't want to date some whore who tells lies about me and doesn't see the difference between cheating and enjoying myself! I don't want to ever see you again, Casey!"

"Yeah, back at you," she snarled as he turned his back on her and stormed from the waiting room. Casey let out a sigh of relief when he was gone, surprised it had gone off without a hitch. Munch and Olivia were both watching her in concern, and Olivia caught her by the elbow and lowered her into a chair when she almost passed out, thoroughly exhausted from the day's events.

"You okay?" Olivia asked cautiously, looking her injuries over and frowning slightly. Casey nodded.

"Yeah. Just tired... Mark only dislocated my shoulder and busted my ribs up a bit, that's all. I'll be okay."

Munch and Olivia exchanged concerned looks before Munch asked, "Casey... how long were you seeing that bastard?"

She shrugged, trying to think of a way to discourage questions about Mark.

"Um, a couple weeks. Last night was the only time he hit me... look, John, Olivia- can you not tell the rest of the guys about this? They don't really have to know, and I don't them getting all worried over nothing."

They hesitated, then Olivia replied, "I suppose we don't _have_ to tell them- but if this happens again, Casey, we will. Now, I suppose you're going to try and claim this had nothing to do with you being sick yesterday?"

Casey gave her a hesitant smile and shook her head. "No, uh... well, Mark... last night was the first time he ever hit me, but its gotten close a couple times, and he was sort of... verbally abusive, too. And I guess I was just scared to go on our date, that's why I got sick."

"Verbally abusive how?" Munch asked coldly. By the way his jaw was clenched and his hands were formed tightly into fists, Casey knew that, if she told this story the right way, he would go do an Elliot on Mark... which was _not_ what she wanted at all.

"Um," she said hurriedly, "When I caught him getting a lap dance from some girl at a club and yelled at him for it, he called me a whore and said that I should know what its like; a guy paying me to do things... and last week, he started saying I was a fat and when I disagreed, and he went ballistic. He almost hit me right then and there, then he drove over to my house and threw away everything except bread and water. What spiked tonight's fight was he caught me sneaking a sandwich in my office. He was on my ass verbally... probably after we'd been going out for a week. I didn't think... I didn't realize..." Casey stopped talking and ended it with a fake sob, hiding her face in her hands.

Olivia wrapped a gentle arm around her and shushed her.

"Shh, honey, it's okay," she said quietly. "It's not your fault. Come on, you're coming home with me."

"No," Casey insisted, shaking her head. "No, I have to go to work. The Rodney case is today. I have to try it, he has to be convicted."

Olivia shook her head as she led the ADA outside.

"I don't think so, Casey. You can't work when you're like this."

Casey sighed, then said quickly, "Look, Liv... I have too. Branch is expecting me there, and if someone else tries the case because I'm not there, El and Fin... they'll know and they'll ask and... I don't want them to know." Casey knew how dangerous it would be for all of SVU to know about this- they would be watching her like hawks, and if Casey came to work one more time if visible bruises or casts, Munch would tell them all where Mark lived and they would go arrest him. And he couldn't be arrested. Not until it was bad enough for attempted murder, because if he got out of jail and got custody of Shelly... Casey wouldn't be able to protect her. No one would.

And she would not be responsible for another child being assaulted.

Olivia squeezed Casey's hand gently, then said reluctantly, "If you don't want them to know, then they don't have to, Casey. I just think it's a bad idea for you to be working today."

Casey sniffled, but still shook her head. "No, no, I have to work. I have to try the case."

Munch said sharply, "Okay, that's it, Casey. I'm not going to let this bastard get away with abusing you. Tonight, me and Fin are going over to his house and arresting him. Just because he's rich doesn't mean he can beat you up and act like it's nothing."

"No!" she exclaimed desperately, ripping out of Olivia's embrace to turn around and face him. "Munch, you can't! If you arrested him, he would get your badge number and then get his fancy lawyers to go after you and probably sue you and the NYPD. He's got enough money that the only way out of that situation would be for the NYPD to settle with his lawyers and fire you. Trust me, Munch, I'll be fine."

Casey knew that those last three words were a lie... but that couldn't matter. How _she_ was didn't matter. Only one thing was important to her now, and she would not let this little mishap stop her from keeping Shelly safe.

Please review


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks to Jeanne Reveur, LiveLoveLikeMe, maigonokaze, Jessica-loves-Katie-, and Kimblee Whitehead for reviewing. And, to Fayth, I don't have any more chapters in the DocX, so until I do, I can't post anymore chapters.

**Chapter 3**

"Ms. Novak! Casey Novak!" Casey's eyes widened in horror when she heard the familiar voice in the courtroom and she turned around quickly, knowing she had to get Linda out of here, and fast. "Oh, thank god you're-"

"Ah, Linda," Casey said quickly, cutting her off and smiling pleasantly. Olivia was in court today and she really didn't need to find out the truth about last night's events. "Good to see you, and I have that file you requested, but it's at my office. Come on, walk with me." She headed out of the courtroom, flashing Olivia a reassuring grin on her way.

The moment she heard Linda following her, she slowed her pace to match her frantic sister-in-law's, mostly because her ribs were not really agreeing with her trying to run in high heels today- or walk in them- and murmured to her, "Linda, you can't ever show up at my work unless it's an emergency. The detectives I work with know the signs of a battered woman and they can't find out anything's wrong, at least now. I'm fine, trust me. I said I'd be okay and I am."

Linda blinked in surprise, but when she had her composure back she stammered, "But... but Casey, I-"

"No buts, Linda. Please. Let me take care of this." She stopped walking and took the other woman's hands tenderly into her own. "Linda, you were perfect last night, you performed your role flawlessly. Keeping Shelly safe is the only priority right now. I know that you can't stand to let Mark do this to me, but he would have eventually killed you. Mark will never kill me. And your daughter trusts only you right now, she wouldn't go with me when you were being hurt even if her life depended on it... even though her life _does_ depend on it." She paused for a moment to let her words sink in, the released Linda's hands and patted her shoulder gently. "Now, Linda, stay strong. Right now, we have to keep up the image that everything's normal. So head on back over to work, and when you get home with Shelly, I'll be there. And if Mark tries to hurt you again, just do exactly what you did last night, and I'll come. I promise."

After she had finally convinced Linda that everything was fine and returned to her office, Casey knew she could really only work for ten minutes before returning home in time to keep Linda and Shelly safe. Unfortunately, working for the DA's office meant that going home at 2:30 was unheard of, and Casey knew she wouldn't be able to keep it up for long. She didn't realize how ridiculous that statement was- that she was going to be beaten probably every day for the next several months and she was worried about keeping her facade in place for the DA's office, not that she might die.

True to her word, she arrived at Mark's house that afternoon, several truckloads of work behind her, but she had a new plan- because of her odd work hours and the fact that she could be called out at all hours of the night, Casey knew that it wouldn't be long before she got a call for a warrant in the middle of Mark hitting her. No way was she going to _dare_ ask Linda to stay behind and save Casey if her work required it- god, no way in hell. However, she didn't want to quit her position at SVU, either. Those people there were her true friends, her only real family, besides Linda and Shelly. No matter how selfish it was, Casey couldn't bear to break off contact with them. They would be the only people keeping her sane in the next few months. So, she had a choice- either risk her position at the DA's office or quit.

Or... 

Casey had a slim chance. She could handle scheduled court dates well enough- just tell Linda to keep Shelly out of the house until she could return home. And she tell SVU that, if they ever needed something in the night, to just call... Serena. Yes. Serena Southerlyn. Casey and Serena had been best friends in college, and Serena still hadn't found a job after being fired. Casey would have no bills anymore, living with Mark and off his paycheck- well, besides skyrocketing medical bills- and she could pay Serena a lot of money to do this for her. Only thing she needed was an excuse for SVU.

SVUSVUSVU

"So, you guys, Serena's been looking for work and she really misses being an ADA, and I've got my friend's niece staying with me," Casey explained quickly, keeping her focus on Fin and Elliot, knowing Munch and Olivia would be the most suspicious of her. "I can't go out and leave the poor kid all alone in the middle of the night, she's only five. I'm paying Serena, which was probably the only reason she agreed to this, but she doesn't want your pity. Not that she needs it- you know Serena..." she trailed off hopefully and- thank god- Elliot and Fin nodded in understanding.

Elliot said, "Yeah, we know about Ser. She's crazy but, um... yeah, I guess special is the right word for that one. So, Casey, when are we gonna meet this friend's niece?"

Casey knew that this answer had to be good, or Munch and Olivia would be on her case like there was no tomorrow. "Um, I'm not sure. Maybe soon, maybe not- you see, Shelly has an anxiety disorder about meeting new people. Strangers really frighten her- and it's not like you guys are all sweet and cuddly and everything. I'll ask her tonight about meeting you guys." 

Of course, probably nothing would save her from Munch and Olivia's questions. "Oh, that's too bad, Casey," Olivia said brightly and smiled at her. "So, tell me some more about this niece. What's she look like?"

Well, no harm in describing Shelly, was there? "Well," Casey started, "She's a brunette, blue eyes, pale skin. Sweet, very quiet, perfect student. I'm telling you, Elliot, if you had this little girl as your daughter, your life would be heaven. She's the sweetest little thing, never causes any trouble..." she sighed in fake satisfaction, unaware that she had just walked halfway into Olivia's trap.

"Oh, that sounds great," Olivia commented before Elliot could say anything. "I'd kill for a blonde little Kelly running around my house."

"Yeah. She really does make going home at night sound a lot better," Casey said, but with her lack of sleep, she didn't realize her mistake, even when everybody looked up at her in surprise.

"Case?" Fin asked after a moment. "I thought you said her name was Shelly and she was a brunette?"

Casey shrugged in confusion. "Yeah, I did. So?"

"Well..." Elliot continued, "You just agreed with my partner when she said her name was Kelly and she was a blonde."

Casey froze, then turned to glare at Olivia in horror. She fumbled quickly for an excuse, saying, "Um, I guess I'm just tired, or wasn't paying attention…?" _For god's sakes, Casey, you're a lawyer, you can lie better then that!_

Olivia smirked slightly, then nodded at Munch and said sharply, "Casey, we need to talk. With me. Interrogation room. Now." She beckoned for Munch to follow, then grabbed Casey's hand and pulled her along behind her to the interrogation room.

Munch headed in behind them and stood between her and the door. "We are not idiots, Casey," Munch admonished sharply. "You start making up lies about this mysterious, nonexistent 'niece' of yours less than 24 hours after you supposedly 'broke up' with your abusive boyfriend- who was that guy you _really_ 'broke up' with, your ER doc?"

"This niece of yours is all a stupid ploy just so you can stay home late with Mark, so that if he's beating you you won't get fired for not showing up at work?" Olivia snapped, glaring at her.

Casey crossed her arms furiously and shouted, "What the hell is it to you anyway, you two? If- and notice, I said _if_- I was being abused, do you really think I'd be a big enough idiot not to tell you guys about it if I needed you? Do you think I'd even be stupid enough to get _involved_ in an abusive relationship? I _work_ with this stuff everyday!"

"Oh, you work with this stuff everyday, that's your excuse for staying and letting him hit you? That's its not abuse because you work in sex crimes? Because that's what you're telling me!" Olivia shouted, pounding her hand down on the table.

"Okay, you know what, Olivia? You don't even know what the hell is going on, and I don't know why the hell you seem to care so much but its not your problem! There _is_ no fuckin problem! No one's being abused, and this has nothing to do with what happened last night! You have no right to interfere in my life and I'm not going to let you! All I'm telling you is what you need to know." With that, Casey got to her feet and stormed out, slamming the door behind her. Elliot and Fin just watched in confusion as she swept out of the precinct.

Munch and Olivia stared after her before Olivia just shook her head and snapped, "Fine! If she wants to stay with that bastard and let him abuse her, then fine! She put it well enough, its not our problem, she can deal with it herself!" Munch nodded in agreement before the two stalked out of the interrogation room and headed back to their desks. Neither one was really mad at Casey, they were furious at Mark. But he wasn't available for them to take it out on, Casey was.

They didn't know that Casey would depend on them for the next few months to keep her sane. All they knew was she was willingly staying with this guy to be abused and not letting anyone offer her any help. They had no idea that it was bigger than just Casey, that she was protecting somebody else. That she was risking her life to keep a little girl and her mother alive. They just thought it was their typical abuse case, only with their best friend as the victim.

SVUSVUSVU

Once again, everything was supposedly 'normal'.

Casey got home about five minutes before Shelly and Linda, Mark asked how her day was, she answered, he nodded sympathetically. He told her about the woman at his work who kept hitting on him though he was married, which led to the usual banter about when the hell was Casey going to find a husband, which led to the usual dance of avoidance where Casey tried to find a way around mentioning that she wasn't sure if she could handle sex with a man, all because of what Mark had done to her, so many years ago.

No mention of what had happened last night. No threats or shouts or accusations. Just a happy brother and sister talking about whatever crossed their minds.

Just like the first time this had happened.

Casey had taken the sling off her dislocated arm at work; she hadn't wanted Mark to see it and do god knows what. Besides, she would need full use of her arms if he attacked her again. She had also stopped at the drug store on the way here and bought the makeup she would need to hide any new bruises, then slipped both her wallet and her cell phone into her boot- her new plan was if she needed to go to the hospital, she'd call a damn cab instead of Munch or anybody else. Munch or Olivia wouldn't take any more of her lies and would come to kick Mark's ass, and she if called upon Elliot or Fin, they would tell their partners about it, then find out the truth about Mark. And anyways, they would only be suckered into her lies once, if she tried to call anybody twice, they would know and arrest Mark. And he couldn't be arrested, not yet.

And as she would quickly learn, Mark got his sick fun or whatever the hell you wanted to call it out of beating Linda and Shelly, not Casey. So while she could protect them from being hit, he would strike her harder. The reprieve she'd gotten her first night here when he hadn't tried to hurt her or Linda was not likely to happen again.

It was only five minutes past midnight when Casey dragged herself out of Mark's room again, bruised and bleeding, aching and crying. But she had enough strength to drive. She managed to get to her car in the garage and drive off, texting Linda that she was fine but not to return to the house until the next day, like she had yesterday. "Son of a bitch," she muttered under her breath, trying to keep herself focused on the road instead of the pain. She had to find a different hospital then the one she'd gone to last night- after all, if these ER visits were to become a regular occurrence, and they were, then Casey would rather not be known as the chick who showed up every night looking like she'd been run over by a truck. Because then the doctors would eventually call SVU, and when they saw their ADA was the victim, then she would have no escape route. Unless something like surgery was absolutely _required_ to fix a broken bone or something, Casey was going to hurry out of the hospital to avoid taking the bill which, in several weeks, she probably wouldn't even be able to pay. Her insurance would drop her eventually if she went to the ER almost every night, and she didn't have the money to pay for _all _the bills that would arise out of these hospital visits.

"Sarah Rolsten," Casey said when the doctor asked her her name, and simply shrugged when he asked how it happened and told him, "Just a small accident." The look on his face said he clearly didn't believe her, but what did she care? Doctor patient confidentiality said he couldn't call the cops without her say so unless there was reason to think a crime had been committed. He didn't have enough evidence for that, and if he did call the cops, she could just leave before they showed up.

Once again, she was taken to get X-rays, and the diagnosis was exactly the same as yesterday, since she hadn't bothered to mention that she had already had three broken ribs before this 'small accident'. Casey nodded in agreement when he gave her instructions to not partake in any strenuous physical activities for the next several weeks and when he gave her a prescription for some painkillers, neither of which she planned to follow through with. Painkillers would cloud her head and make her lethargic when she needed her reflexes and couldn't afford to be slow, and it was either allow her ribs to heal or protect Linda and Shelly. She could deal with a little pain if it meant keeping those two alive and unhurt.

SVUSVUSVU

This time, Casey was prepared, and had used to makeup to cover up all visible bruises when she came into work and walked slowly, painfully inside, smiling at people instead of saying hello because it hurt to breathe. Unfortunately for her, Olivia was waiting for her outside her office, holding two cups of coffee and an apologetic smile. "Hey, Casey," she said when the ADA walked up uncertainly. "Um... I just wanted to apologize for yesterday. You're right, your personal life is none of my business... Munch and I are just worried about you because of what happened with Mark."

A very small yet extraordinarily selfish part of Casey wanted to wrap her arms around the detective's neck and sob into her shoulder, beg her to protect her and make the mean man go away, to keep her safe and never let him hurt her again- but that was simply the child in her, who believed in fairness, easy solutions, and happy endings. It was simple for Casey to ignore that voice and smile at her, accepting the coffee. "It's fine, Liv," she assured her, fishing out her keys to unlock her office. "Thanks, though, I-"

At the moment, a very annoying intern came rushing down the hall, carrying an open bottle of water. Olivia easily sidestepped him, but Casey's injuries prevented her from moving too quickly and he ran into her, spilling the water all over her. She gasped in pain as her ribs flared up and, still unsteady, stumbled back and fell, barely managing to catch herself with her sprained wrist. "Son of a bitch!" she shouted, partly because of the pain but mostly at the intern. "What is wrong with you?" Olivia pulled her to her feet and watched on, amused, as Casey unleashed her wrath on the poor intern. "For god's sakes, you are a fuckin intern! Wherever you're going isn't so god damn important that it can't wait two god damn seconds! And there is a _reason_ you don't run with open containers, it's so you don't spill shit all over everybody else! Do you know how much this jacket costs? And another thing, don't you-"

"Casey!" Olivia interrupted, stepping around the withering intern so she could see the ADA's face.

"What?" Casey demanded as she whirled around to face the detective.

Olivia reached out and touched the makeup dripping down Casey's face, then smeared it out of the way. Casey visibly winced and Olivia gasped when it revealed a livid bruise which hadn't been there yesterday. "Casey! How the hell... how on earth did you get that?"

Casey blinked, then realized what must have of happened. "You see what happens when you do stupid things, people get screwed over by your stupidity," she muttered to the intern before waving him on. He dashed away, leaving Casey shifting on her feet uncomfortably, trying to find a way out of this mess. "Listen, Liv, I- these are from that ER visit you were there for, when Mark... see, the bruises hadn't had time to form yet- I used makeup yesterday, too."

Olivia hesitated, and if this had been the only incident, she probably would have believed her. However, there was still the issue with Casey lashing out in the precinct earlier… maybe, if she pushed, she could get Casey to admit to something she was lying about now. "I'm not buying it, Casey. Maybe if you were talking to some old friend from law school or something, but I'm an SVU detective. I work with battered women everyday, so feeding me some bullshit line about 'oh, Liv, I've always had a black eye!' isn't gonna work."

Shifting her weight from one leg to the other, Casey sighed and tried to think of a good excuse. "Liv, come on. You saw me break up with Mark, didn't you? What exactly do you think happened, that I just hired some random guy off the street to make you _think _I had broken up with him when I really hadn't? Olivia, you know I wouldn't do that."

"I don't know, Casey, you seem to be doing a lot of things lately I never thought you'd do." Once again, from nervousness to fury in a second- easily irritable had always been a symptom of sleep deprivation, for Casey.

"Olivia, you're my friend, but this is my life and not yours! If you're going to try and make more out of something than it is or try and claim my boyfriend's abusive, then I don't want to-"

"Casey, come on! You're being ridiculous! And why won't you admit to this; come on, you work in SVU, too, you know that abuse cases-"

"Yeah, I know that I'm not being abused! Olivia, either you forget about this, or we're not friends anymore. I'm sorry, but that's simply how this has to be." Casey didn't even think before threatening to cut off her friendship with the woman who she loved like a sister- she couldn't afford a weakness like friendship or love in the battle she was now fighting. While having a friend would make it easier for her emotionally, it would create more problems than it would solve, and though it broke her heart to do it... it had to be done. "Next time you talk to me, it's going to either be about this or it's not. If it's not, we're still friends. If it is... well, I'll know the choice you made." She turned and slammed the door in the detective's face, her ribs burning in protest at her short speech, but that wasn't why she was crying.

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	4. Chapter 4

Thanks to LiveLoveLikeMe for reviewing. And those lurkers out there, I know who you are. Review review review!

**Chapter 4**

It had started off like a beautiful, perfect, amazing blessing in disguise- Mark, telling the whole family that he was leaving for two weeks on a business trip the next day.

For Linda, it meant two weeks without guilt-ridden tears, without holding her scared daughter and being forced to leave Casey to her fate. For Shelly, it meant two peaceful weeks without her abusive father.

For Casey, it meant two whole beautiful weeks without being hit. Two weeks for her to lie down and let her injuries heal, instead of overtaxing herself as usual and not letting her body heal itself. She'd ripped her stitches out a total of five times in the past month and knew that, sooner or later, she was going to run out of hospitals in New York City and would have to start driving to Buffalo or something... as if she wasn't already doing that. But she should of realized what a two week absence would mean for Mark- two whole weeks without his drug of choice, his alcohol, his cocaine- beating a helpless women.

It was as usual, except rougher, more painful- and something that hadn't happened since... but no, she wasn't going to allow that to cross her mind. "You filthy, rotten whore!" he shouted when he backed away from her aching, limp body, sweating and panting. "What the hell is wrong with you? Why the hell do you storm in here every night and take Linda's place?" 

Casey wasn't sure what answer he wanted, so she kept silent, just like... but she couldn't think about that. When he didn't get a response, he finally backed away and sat on the edge of his bed, allowing Casey to leave. But she couldn't stand up- every time she tried, it felt like her entire right leg was a blazing inferno. She couldn't even crawl on her hands and knees- she was forced to drag herself across the floor, using any stable object she could to yank herself several agonizing inches. It hurt like nothing she had ever known... well, could remember, at least, but she couldn't manage to do it. She couldn't manage to stand up or even use her right leg at all, no matter how hard she tried. And the main reason that annoyed her? It meant she couldn't drive herself to the hospital or walk. And another part that sucked? It wasn't attempted murder, not yet. It never would be. Something Casey hadn't told Linda was that attempted murder had very little to do with the severity of the beating, it had to do with the intent behind it. And no matter how bad a defense attorney he hired, it would be impossible for Casey or any other ADA to prove intent. The type of assault he could be charged with for Casey was a misdemeanor. The worst he could get for that would be 11 months, 29 days, and a 2,500 dollar fine. She had been waiting for him to... to do what he'd done tonight, because that had a long enough prison sentence. She just hadn't been able to Linda what she'd really been waiting for him to do. Because there was no way her sister-in-law would of allowed her to step in and take her place anymore if Casey had told her the truth about her plan.

None of which mattered if she didn't manage to get up the courage to wait until Mark had left on his business trip to call for help, and then she had to charge him with... with what'd he done. She still wasn't allowing herself to think the word, and her strict discipline to keep herself in control was easy to recall, even after what she'd just been through- sleep deprivation, as severe as hers was, took every emotion and dulled it, softened it, until it could barely be felt against the cloud of exhaustion. Falling asleep standing up in a hot shower meant she was too tired to be emotional about anything. It meant she was too exhausted to realize what had just happened to her and what she would have to go through because of it.

So she lay on the floor the rest of the night. She had managed to pull a blanket off the couch and hide herself with it, so that when he left the next morning, he wouldn't feel the need to hit her again. Still, she squeezed her eyes shut when he passed, fighting memories of her past mockery of a childhood and praying he would leave her be. He did. And, when he was finally gone, Casey pulled out her cell phone- he had previously dislocated both her shoulders and she hadn't let them heal, so it hurt like hell, but she managed it. She dearly wanted Olivia instead of Linda... but she had a responsibility to her sister-in-law, her niece. That would be fulfilled first. Only then would she have the chance to give into her internal desire for comfort.

"Linda," she coughed when she answered the phone, "listen, it's Casey. Don't worry, Mark's gone, but I need you to come pick me up at your house. I'm sorry, but if this is too much trouble you don't have to, I-"

"Casey, Casey, it's fine," Linda assured her quickly, and Casey could hear the worry in her voice. "Nothing could ever be too much... not after what you've done for me and Shelly. Now, I'm on my way- you need me to take you to the hospital, or...?"

"I... yes," Casey murmured, the shame in her voice clear to even herself, "but it's no emergency, honey, I don't need you to hurry- if you're in the middle of something, or if you need to-"

"Hey, what did I just get finished saying?" No matter what Linda told her, though, Casey would always have her guilt, and it made her hurt with shame when she heard the worry in Linda's voice. "I'm on my way right now, Casey, I promise. How... how bad is it?"

She hesitated before she was sure she could keep her voice steady and said, "Not too bad, Linda, I just hurt my leg, so I can't walk or drive down there, and I can't really crawl out to a cab, now can I?" Casey's weak attempt at a joke fell flat in Linda's concern for her.

While she waited for her sweet, flawless, innocent sister-in-law to come bring her a numbing relief in the form of a hospital's morphine, Casey lay in the floor in agony, focusing on the physical pain to avoid thinking about how she would tell her friends at SVU what had happened. This was enough to keep him away from Shelly. But it would ruin her life, for this secret to come out- what she had allowed to happen, what she had done with him... what kind of reputation would she have? A worthless, pathetic slut, that's what they'd say about her.. And there was no way she'd ever be allowed to work in SVU again, even if she kept her law license. And even if she was allowed to keep her life, it would be a worthless gesture- no one would want anything to do with her once the truth came out. She was dirty, tainted. Broken and worthless.

Linda hurried inside, staring at the limp body on the floor in shock. "Casey!" she gasped, dashing over to her and kneeling by her side, stroking the mass of sweat-dampened red hair out of her bloodshot eyes, tears coming to her own eyes. "Oh, god..."

"Linda... I... I had to tell you what was going on before I went to the hospital. Do you think you can carry me, or-"

Linda immediately shook her head, making Casey fall silent as she looked her prone body over worriedly. "Case, you're a foot taller than me! I can't carry you out! I'm going to have to call an ambulance." Casey gritted her teeth but remained silent- over time, the burning ache in her right leg hadn't dulled or gotten anything besides worse, but she was starting to lose coherent thought as her mind shut down, forcing her body to fall asleep while she knew it was dangerous to do so. Linda called 911, then moved her hand down to hold Casey's, looking over her nervously. "My god, Casey... I'm so sorry, I never should have let this happen..."

"Don't worry. Everything's fine," Casey said, smiling weakly at her. "This was the one, Linda! I can get a conviction out of this one! He'll never be able to hurt you or Shelly again." Linda looked down at her in shock, and it was clear from her expression that she wasn't sure whether to be thrilled or in tears. She leaned down and embraced her gently, kissing her sweaty, pale forehead and caressing her hair again.

By the time the ambulance came, Casey was nearly in tears from the pain, lying absolutely still and hoping the pain would dull, but it wouldn't. Two EMTS hurried inside and headed over to Linda and Casey. The woman who Casey saw as the real victim backed away, allowing them to examine her. Casey forced herself to look at them, not wanting Linda to hear that she lied about the severity of her injuries but she knew the EMTS had to know about them. "I've got some broken ribs," she ground out, struggling to meet the taller one's eyes, "and my shoulders are dislocated. And my left wrist is sprained..."

Linda stared at her in horror, and even the EMTs, who had seen limbs ripped off and bodies torn in half, winced they saw her livid bruises and unhealed broken bones. The older EMT examined the stitches on her stomach, the wound underneath having turned decidedly green, and said, "I think it's infected."

The younger one nodded as he looked over her leg and added on, "And I can't be sure, but I think her right hip is broken."

"Come on, let's get her out to the ambulance." The two picked her up and moved her onto the stretcher- it hurt so much when they moved her she couldn't help it; she cried out, closing her eyes tightly and biting her lip so hard it bled, trying to remain silent and not attract any attention or worry. They strapped her onto the stretcher and carried her outside, and she closed her eyes in embarrassment, praying that Munch and Cragen had already left for work- she didn't one any of them to see her like this . She didn't want Linda to, either, but supposed she didn't have a choice with that one.

SVUSVUSVU

Casey heard a light sobbing sound as she slowly returned to consciousness. Nothing hurt as bad as it had before, and for that, she was grateful. The sobbing sound continued, and she struggled to open her eyes against her exhaustion. But when she recognized the woman's voice as Linda's, the surge in adrenaline gave her enough strength to open her eyes immediately and sit upright to help her. "Linda," she coughed weakly, frowning when Mark was nowhere in sight- that she was in a hospital room. It took her a few moments to remember what had happened, and she leaned back in bed, closing her eyes for a moment before smiling slightly at Linda. "Hey..."

"Casey! I... I'm so sorry..." Linda reached over to take her hand into hers from her chair by her bedside. "I never knew that... well, I did, but..."

"Shh," Casey soothed immediately, shaking her head at Linda's guilt. She didn't get to feel guilty. "It's okay, Linda. This is _not_ your fault, I can promise you that- and it's not going to happen again. What happened last night is enough to keep him away from Shelly. I'm going to write up the paperwork on the charges and file them with the courts as soon as I'm released."

Linda frowned uncertainly, then asked, "Case, I'm not a lawyer, but... you can't prosecute a case you're a victim in, can you?"

Casey knew, of course, that she was right. She wanted to do this without involving anybody from SVU or any of her friends from the DA's office, but she knew how impossible that would be. She just sighed and said, "Let me take care of everything, Linda."

Her sister-in-law sighed, then squeezed her hand and said softly, "Well, that aside, Casey, you're going to be in the hospital for a couple of days. The EMTs were right about your injuries- they fixed your broken hip in surgery and had you on some antibiotics for the infection, but its going to take a couple of days to clear up. Also, they said that you're ah... previous injuries showed no signs of healing and they said you would have to get bed rest for the next three weeks for your ribs to heal."

Casey grimaced, then caught sight of the clock and said quickly, "Linda, it's about time for you to go pick up Shelly from school. Don't worry, I'll be fine. Go on, and... and would you mind bringing her down to the hospital? I want to see my niece."

Linda smiled at her, standing up and leaning over to kiss her forehead. "Anything for the woman who's saved my life- and my daughter's." When Linda left, Casey fought back the guilt struggling to rise and reached over for the phone on the wall, calling Branch. When he answered, she hesitated, then said meekly, "Arthur, it's Casey. I-"

"Oh, Casey! You're not dead! Well, that's not very good, because that is about the only excuse I would take for you missing the trial- closing arguments, no less! When I found out about your little stunt with Serena, I decided I would allow it because it was temporary, but missing a trial is unacceptable, Casey. Unless you have an extremely good excuse, I'm putting you on unpaid suspension for no less than one month."

"Oh, god, the trial. I am so sorry, Arthur, I- in the midst of everything, I didn't remember it. But I do have a good excuse- I, um... I'm in the hospital. I'll be back at work in a couple days, but I was in a... a car crash earlier today on my way into work. I was unconscious, that was the only reason I didn't call."

Arthur hesitated uncertainly, then sighed and said, "Casey, why must you always make people look like an ass when they're criticizing you? Well, I can get someone to cover your case load for you until you get back and I'll notify the detectives. Call me when you think you'll be up to coming back in to work."

"Oh, no, you don't have to call SVU, I'll only be gone for a couple days. If they ask, just say that I asked for a few personal days, please." When Casey saw who could only be her doctor walk into the room, she smiled slightly at him and said quickly, "Arthur, I have to go. I'll talk to you in a few days." She hung up the phone before he could reply before looking at her doctor.

He nodded at her and said, "Welcome back to the world, Ms. Novak."

She chuckled softly and said, "Thanks. Um, my friend already told me about the surgery and everything- but, I, uh... I need a rape kit."

The doctor looked at her sympathetically and nodded. "All right, I can get a nurse in here right away. Now, do you want me to call the Special Victims Unit for you? They investigate rapes."

Casey immediately shook her head, terrified at the notion of them knowing about this. "No, no, don't, please. But I need you to run the DNA you get from it in your lab, please."

"Of course. But the labs are a little backed up, so it could take a couple weeks."

Casey sighed, then nodded. "All right, that's fine. I understand." The doctor blinked in surprise at how calm she was, then went out to get the nurse to start the rape kit. Casey closed her eyes and sighed shakily, trying to suppress her tremors. She had lived through a rape kit once before, and she could do it again. She was going to use the fact that she was still in shock to keep herself calm.

The nurse came into the hospital room, sitting on a stool at the end of the bed and giving her a comforting smile. "Are you ready?" she asked Casey gently.

She closed her eyes and nodded. She had seen this a hundred times before... well, theoretically, at least. She had looked at the results of rape kits before and knew what rape kits consisted of. She could handle this- and besides, she'd had one before, and now, there was more of a reason to get one. Taking in a shaky breath, Casey opened her eyes and looked back at the doctor. "I'm ready." She held her breath as she slowly spread her legs for the doctor, staring at the ceiling so she wouldn't have to see the younger woman in between her legs. She could feel what the doctor was doing, just like last time, but if she couldn't see her, it felt slightly better... even though she had to keep glancing down to make sure it wasn't somebody else.

Whenever she winced because of what the doctor was doing, the doctor would apologize to her and stop for a second to make sure she was okay. When she was done, she stood up as Casey squeezed her legs together and pulled them up to her chest, avoiding the doctor's gaze. "Okay, there was penetration, and I found hair and semen. I can get that to the lab and get you the morning after pill. You'll need to come back in six months to test for any STDs, but-"

"Oh, ah, that... that won't be necessary," Casey said quickly. "He doesn't have any STDs, and I'm taking birth control."

The doctor hesitated, appraising her state of mind before asking, "Are you sure he's clean? He may have lied to you, ma'am-"

"No, I took his blood and brought it to a lab to have it tested. Unless his blood is lying, he's clean." The doctor blinked in surprise, clearly shocked, then slowly stood up and headed to the door.

"I... all right, then, I'll just go bring these results to the lab. If you change your mind about the blood tests or anything, you just have to tell me." Casey nodded and was about to appreciate that she was alone when, as the doctor walked out, Linda and Shelly came in.

Casey sat up straighter and smiled at the two of them, particularly Shelly. "Hey, you guys!" she said softly, beckoning them closer.

Linda smiled at her while Shelly walked slowly forward, looking up at her with wide eyes. "Aunt Casey?" she asked slowly, as if confused. Her voice was small and childlike- not surprising, because of her age, but Casey was extremely proud that she had managed to preserve at least a small bit of innocence in the poor girl.

"It's okay, Shelly," she assured her, knowing she was scared of by the bruising and all the equipment the hospital had attached to her. "It's just me. Daddy's not here and he's not gonna hurt you." 

Shelly took another step forward and climbed up onto the foot of the hospital bed, hugging her knees to her chest and watching her warily. "Aunt Casey... why does Daddy hurt you like he hurted Mama?"

She hesitated, knowing that Shelly still didn't trust her completely, then said, "Because Daddy got hurt as a kid, kinda like he hurt you. He doesn't know how to deal with it, is all."

Linda looked up at Casey in surprise- it was clear she hadn't known about what had happened to Mark when he was a kid. But there wasn't enough time to get into that right now. Shelly looked down, her lower lip trembling, then asked shakily, "So... so, am I gonna have to hurt people, like Daddy? Cause he hurted me?"

Her breath caught in her throat, and Casey shook her head immediately and said, "No, Shelly. I got hurt like him, and look at me. I don't hurt people like Daddy. Just because he hurt you doesn't mean you're a bad person or you're going to grow up to be one." When it was clear Shelly was still uncertain, Casey opened her arms to the little girl and said, "Come here, Shells. It's okay. I won't hurt you, I promise."

After a moment of hesitation, Shelly glanced at her mother, who nodded at her in encouragement. She bit her lip, then crawled forward on the bed over to Casey and nestled her head in her neck. Casey smiled at her, wrapping her arms around the little girl and shedding a few tears into her hair for both herself and the pain Linda and Shelly had suffered for her. But they didn't have to deal with her being upset right now. Swallowing her own emotions back, Casey murmured into her ear, "Shelly, you're not going to become a bad person because of what your father did to you. Your father and I were both hurt in the same way, by the same person, and look- I go after people just like him, I put them in prison where they can't hurt people like you and me anymore. And the only person I've ever hit was your father, to try and get him off me- just like you and Mommy fought back against him. And fighting back isn't wrong, sweetheart. It doesn't make you like him. I promise."

Shelly looked up at her tearfully and asked softly, "Not even a little bit?"

Casey shook her head, smiling at her. "Not even an eensy, tinsy bit." Shelly hesitated, then buried her head in Casey's neck again, and the ADA wrapped her arms tightly around her and rubbed small circles into the little girl's back. She knew that Shelly was too young to really understand everything Casey was talking about and that it probably hadn't been a good idea to say that the reason Mark had hurt her was because he had been hurt himself, but it was the truth. Well, part of it. And when Shelly was older, she would understand that a far bigger part was the fact that Casey had fought against those impulses, and Mark hadn't. That she had dealt with the abuse, and he hadn't- but she couldn't feel sorry for him. She had made the hard and painful choice to deal with what had happened, but Mark hadn't made that choice, even though it was his to make- and she had lied to Shelly, too. The abuse she had suffered had been so much worse than Mark's. She couldn't feel _sorry_ for him when she had suffered so much more _because_ of him, when he had been far too weak to make the hard choice she had made.

She held Shelly for over an hour until she could feel that the little girl had gone to sleep, then nodded at Linda and said softly, so as not to disturb her, "Hey, Linda, you two should get home. I don't want Shelly to see too much of me and what her father did."

Linda nodded in understanding, reaching out to take Shelly's limp form from her. "All right, Case, I get it. I'm going to call you every day to see how you're doing, all right?" Casey smiled at her and shrugged, saying that it was okay, waiting for her to disappear with Shelly to lean back against the pillows and close her eyes in exhaustion. This whole mess was almost over. All she had to do was wait for his blood tests to come back- she knew how the law worked; she had waited for Mark to throw away a tissue, then had grabbed it and preserved it in a bag, so if this had ever happened, she would have his DNA to run against the rape kit's. Of course, there would be no proof saying that it was _his _DNA, but when the DNA matched the evidence from her rape kit, the judge would order that he take a blood test in order to clear up the confusion. And that was all she would need.

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	5. Chapter 5

Thanks to 7Seven7 for reviewing. And you lurkers out there- I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS! RAWR!

Fayth: I think Microsoft is being a bitch and uploading my unrevised files to fanfiction again. A lot of the mistakes you pointed out I had already fixed before uploading- like the thoughts being in italics- but apparently Microsoft uploaded my draft. Something else that confused you was a couple of stupid typos that I fixed but I most have uploaded the wrong version. Sorry!

**Chapter 5**

True to her word, Linda called her every day, and occasionally came by on her lunch break, when Shelly was in school. No one from SVU came by, so Branch must not have told them about the fact that she was in the hospital. She would need to use crutches for the next couple of months, because of her broken hip, and because of the fact that she missed the trial date, her plan to use any personal days to get bed rest for her ribs had been shot to hell- there was no way Branch would allow it. So she was just going to have to deal with it. The doctor finally said she could be released as long as she promised to stay in bed. She smiled sweetly and said oh, of course she would, and he let her leave after three days of lying on her ass with nothing to do. She knew she really should stay with Linda and Shelly, but... she couldn't do it. It would be the right thing to do, in case Mark came back- but she couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't look at the little girl and see her father in her eyes, she couldn't live in the same house she had been beaten in for the past few months, she wanted to be alone, where she wouldn't have to keep up the illusion that she was okay, where she didn't have to work to look okay. She could just lay on the couch and sleep or cry or get drunk and no one would care.

So, she called Linda to tell her that she was being released and was going to stay home for a few days, because she knew Linda would want her to follow the doctor's orders and get rest, but, unfortunately, she had no place to stay. After telling Linda to call her 24 hours in advance of Mark's return, she just stood outside of the hospital on her crutches, trying to think of where she could go- after deciding to live with Mark three months ago, she had moved out of her apartment, putting all her stuff in a storage unit downtown. Finally, she decided to call Olivia and try to salvage what was left of their friendship.

The detective was thrilled, though surprised, to hear from her. "Casey, hi! What do you need?"

"Um, Liv, I... I kind of need a place to stay. Would you mind coming to pick me up?"

Olivia hesitated, clearly uncertain, then said, "Yeah, sure you can stay with me. Where are you?"

This was going to be the difficult part. "I'm... I'm outside Mercy General."

A moment passed in silence, then Olivia exclaimed, "The _hospital?_ Casey, is _that_ where've you been the past three days? You've been in the _hospital?"_ When Casey meekly confirmed this, Olivia's tirade continued. "Did Mark do this to you? Is that why you were in the hospital? Casey, I told you that guy wasn't a-"

"Look, Liv, I promise I'll tell you everything, can you just come down here please?"

Olivia hesitated, then said coldly, "I'll be right there." Then she hung up. Sighing unhappily, Casey put her cell phone in her pocket and rubbed her temples. She could just tell a headache was coming on.

After she had been at SVU for a while, she had asked Olivia if she could put her down as the next of kin on insurance forms and everything- after all, it wasn't like she could put Mark down there. She had changed it to Linda after moving in with Mark because she really didn't need Olivia getting a call from the hospital just because Casey had been knocked around a little. Hopefully, Olivia wouldn't remember the fact that she should of gotten a call after Casey's hip surgery. She didn't feel like explaining that right now- hell, she didn't feel like explaining anything right now.

With a groan, Casey crossed her arms tightly over her chest and tried to figure out how much she should tell Olivia right now. She wasn't sure if she could handle telling her the truth yet. She couldn't handle telling her... that. Her mind pointed out the obvious holes in her plan, but she didn't want to think about those right now. Everything was going to come out sooner or later, and her reputation was shot to hell either way. Her job was gone, she knew that for sure. And would her friends stay with her? Well, that, she seriously doubted. They were the kindest, most loyal people in the world, but no one would want to associate with her once they learned the truth.

Casey sighed, sitting gingerly down on a bench and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She was tired, to put it plain and simple. Maybe Olivia would ignore the fact that Casey had been an insufferable bitch to her these past few months. Maybe the detective would be kinder than she had any right to expect and let her sleep instead of explaining everything... no, she was just stalling. It was true that she was exhausted, but this story would be better to tell while she was half-asleep, rather than wide awake. That way, it wouldn't hurt as much… but she didn't want it to be told.

Her judgment was compromised, because of how little sleep she'd been getting- that, she knew for certain. Maybe if she got a couple day's worth of sleep, there would be a solution that made itself clear to her. Maybe maybe maybe. Everything had been uncertain, since she'd moved in with Mark. And now that he'd shattered her life, it was time for her to try and put the pieces back together.

Olivia came walking up, then, and when she saw the bruises on her face and arms and the crutches next to her, she gasped before hurrying forward. "Casey!" she exclaimed. "What... what happened to you?"

She stared up at her uncertainly, trying to stammer an answer but failing completely. "I... I, uh... uh... it was... and now, I..."

The detective frowned slightly, then said, "Come on. Let me get you over to my car, and then you can tell me." Casey nodded in thanks, then got slowly to her feet and swung along after Olivia, who walked slowly so Casey didn't have to try and hurry after her.

When she reached Olivia's car, the detective hovered several feet back, knowing it would be better to help her but she knew how much even offering it would take away the few shards of dignity she had left; Casey's pride would never allow it. She let her right leg hover in the air and held both her crutches in her left hand and supporting herself with her right hand on the car top. She lowered herself slowly into the car, wincing slightly, and Olivia crossed her arms and set scowled at her when she saw how much pain Casey had to be in. Why hadn't she told anybody at SVU? Why hadn't she called them for help?

After Olivia had started the car and began driving away, she glanced at Casey and said, "Well... I suppose I could start with the easy questions now; do the harder ones when I get you to my place... Case, could you just describe the physical injuries to me?"

Her cheeks flushed a bright red as she looked away, clearly ashamed. She stared at a stain on the dashboard and said softly, "Um, not everything's from what happened three days ago, but I, um... few broken ribs, some stitches. One of the cuts got infected but I think the doctors cleared it up. And, uh, broken hip, but that's all I can remember."

Olivia's sharp intake of breath told Casey all she had to know. Anger, hurt, betrayal. Casey looked away, staring at her feet with tears burning in her eyes. She knew what Olivia was thinking right now. She had had _surgery_ and hadn't even bothered to tell her best friends. She had been in the hospital and hadn't even mentioned it. Casey swallowed back her many apologies, then said softly without looking at her friend, "Yell at me all you want, Liv. It's okay. I deserve it."

Olivia hesitated, then glanced at her and snapped, "Casey, how the hell could you not tell us about this? A broken hip means surgery, Casey. _Surgery_. How could you not tell me? How could you not tell _us?_ And wait for a second- didn't you have me as your next of kin on all the insurance forms and stuff? How come the hospital didn't call me?"

"I... I had to change it- Liv, I'm so sorry," she said softly, closing her eyes against the burning tears. "I'm sorry, I should of told you about... I'm sorry. I deserve it, keep yelling at me, please." Her voice cracked and she hid her face with her hair. "I'm sorry."

Something in Casey's voice made the detective soften, and she patted her arm gently before returning her attention to the road. "It's okay, Case. Let me get you home, and then we can talk about this." Casey winced involuntarily at the mention of home, which had been a synonym for hell for the past several months. She smiled slightly when Olivia didn't notice, but knew that there was no getting out of it. She wasn't going to lie and say Mark was her boyfriend. Olivia was going to have to know everything... including why she got the rape kit.

But was she ready to tell that horrible secret about her past?

Her internal torment hurt just as much as it always had, but there was also the knowledge that it was over. Mark had made a mistake, one that would be his undoing. It was finally over. The hell that had began when she was barely fourteen, not even in high school, was finally over. True, he hadn't been convicted yet, and Casey knew better than anyone that it was a mistake to think you knew which way a jury would go- after all, with OJ Simpson, the whole country had thought they'd known, and everyone had been wrong. But it didn't matter. With the charges Casey was going to throw at him on his record, he wouldn't ever get custody of Shelly again. And then, there was her Plan B- tell Linda to take Shelly and run. When Shelly was eighteen, then everything would be fine, and Mark would have no right to custody.

God, she wanted all this to just end. To go away, so she would never have to see or deal with it ever, _ever_ again.

Olivia parked the car and, once again, Casey could see how the detective was restraining from helping her out of the car. Blushing furiously, Casey limped up to Olivia's apartment building, gripping her crutches so hard it hurt her hand. She wanted to cry, but couldn't bring herself to admit weakness, to do anything as selfish as trying to make herself feel better when it did nothing for anybody else.

_But, god help me, I want to..._ She wanted to, for at least one god damn second, be a selfish, spoiled brat, who sobbed in her friend's arms and begged for her help.

She could tell how badly Olivia wanted to ask her what was going on, and it broke Casey's heart that she didn't. Olivia knew she wasn't ready to talk about it yet and didn't force it. She led her inside, asking if Casey wanted to take a shower while she ordered takeout. And yes, she did want to take a shower. Living with Mark... taking a shower had been so, so uncomfortable, so horrible, she had rushed and taken showers in less than three minutes. It was never enough to get the fell of Mark off her.

Standing on one leg, Casey scrubbed her damaged skin as hard as she could, until it was red and raw, her tears falling down her face and blending in with the streams of water and soap. She hadn't realized how long she'd been in the shower when Olivia called to her that it had been half an hour and the food had just gotten here. She blushed with embarrassment and shouted that she would be right there before turning off the shower and slowly dried herself off with the towel. It hurt, but, then again, pain had become a constant companion for three months. She was used to it.

Tears started forming in her eyes again, but she fought against them with all her might. She had to be strong for Olivia, because tonight, she was going to tell her the truth about these past three months. If Olivia wanted to kick her out, then... so be it.

She could see the questions in the detective's eyes as she limped out to the front room, but Olivia kept silent. Casey's hands trembled slightly and she struggled to remain calm, but it wasn't easy. Finally, Olivia pushed the takeout aside and sat on the coffee table, across from Casey. She tenderly took the ADA's hands into her own and said, "Case, what has been going on with you lately? Ever since I saw you in the ER three months ago, you've been different. You told me that I couldn't interfere or you would stop being my friend, so I didn't interfere, but... has Mark been hurting you?"

Casey closed her eyes tightly, then whispered, "Olivia... it's not what you think."

Her words were not meant as the usual lie abuse victims told, that it wasn't what it looked like, but Olivia seemed to take it like that. She let go of Casey's hands like she'd been burned and got to her feet, pacing back and forth furiously.

"_No,_ Casey!" she shouted. "I'm not gonna accept that from you anymore! I shouldn't have accepted it as an excuse from the beginning! And I should of realized that losing you as a friend was worth it, if it kept you safe. But why the hell can't you trust me? Why do you insist on staying with that son of a bitch who's hurting you? God damn it, Casey, you work at SVU! You know what abusive relationships look like! You should of told me the first time he hit you; you never should of gone back to him! And I don't give a damn how rich he is; we could of protected you from him! I don't care if he's the president, Casey, if you had told us, we wouldn't have let him-"

"_He's my brother, Olivia!_" Casey shouted, clenching her hands into fists and raising her head to glare at her. "_Mark is my god damn brother!_"

_Not that it changed much, still treats me like a girlfriend to be abused..._

Olivia stared at her, clearly shocked. She blinked, then sat down again, a good distance away from Casey, and asked, "Your brother? But... but then who's been hurting you? Why didn't your brother protect you from him?"

Casey sighed heavily and leaned back into the couch cushions, rubbing her eyes tiredly. "Listen to yourself, Liv. Listen to what you just said."

But Olivia still didn't get it. It was too ingrained in the public's mind that older brothers protected their younger sisters and didn't abuse them. That they took the blows from abusive parents and protected their little sisters, that they threatened the boyfriends and got furious when they were hurt. Even SVU detectives made such generalizations without realizing it. "God, Liv. I live with my brother. I get abused by the man I'm living with. Two plus two can only equal four."

The detective stared at her in shock, then said slowly, "You... you're brother has been the one abusing you?" Casey nodded at her, waiting for her to get it. "He's been the one- but how... and..."

Casey sighed, then decided to fill her in on as much as she could handle telling. "Olivia, I've been living with Mark for three months now. I, ah... I learned that he had been abusing Shelly, his daughter, and Linda, his wife physically... _just_ physically. Not sexually. I know the law, though, I know that it would be difficult to prove, and even if they did, they wouldn't be able to get him on aggravated assault. The most they could slap him with is a misdemeanor, since there's no proof he hit Shelly more than once or twice, even though Linda and I both know he did more. A misdemeanor would have him out of jail in probably 6 months, tops, and... and I knew I could do better. I knew I could get him on worse if I took their beatings for them. I had to protect them from Mark- it would of killed me to let them get hit because I couldn't protect them. So it was a win win situation- I protect my family, and I get Mark on more than a fuckin misdemeanor."

Unfortunately for her, Olivia was a detective. She wouldn't buy her line about attempted murder, but she wasn't going to guess what her real plan had been because she and Mark were related, either. She was just going to have to say it. At Olivia's questioning look, she sighed, then stared at the floor and said softly, "I wanted to charge him with rape. I could get him the maximum and then Shelly would be too old when he got out for him to have custody. I have friends on the parole board; I could keep him in prison the whole fifteen years."

Olivia stared at her in horror, paler than Casey had ever seen her. It was clear that she had two questions on her mind- how had she known Mark would eventually rape her, and had he done so? But it was obvious Olivia had forgotten how to speak. Casey wasn't ready to answer the first question yet, but she was able to answer the second, because she had to. "He raped me three days ago."

The detective was clearly shocked beyond belief. Slowly, carefully, she raised a hand and tenderly rubbed it over Casey's shoulder, making sure she wasn't afraid of the physical touch. Casey didn't bother telling her that she already knew how she was going to respond to the rape. She didn't bother telling her that it wasn't so much touch that terrified her, but her state of mind when anyone, even a man, would touch her. She remembered realizing this, years ago, when a male friend of hers had wrapped his arms around her neck from behind and she had encountered no fear, but had panicked when a different male friend had draped his arm loosely around her shoulders. There was no use in telling that to Olivia now- because that would mean telling her the truth about what Mark had done to her, years ago.

Olivia gently wrapped an arm around her, holding her close, even though she wasn't crying. Casey hadn't let herself get worked up over this because she hadn't wanted to be crying. It wasn't like the detective didn't know what to do or say, but she was good with victims and comfort. However, nothing in her training prepared her for what to do when it was her best friend who'd been raped by her brother. "I'm sorry, Casey, I... we had no idea that things were just bad," she said softly into the ADA's hair.

"And that's how I wanted it."

After a moment of rubbing small circles into Casey's back, Olivia pulled away, keeping a firm grip on her shoulders. "Casey...I don't understand this. Normally, family members of abusers and rapists defend them- they don't believe the wife and run in to save the day."

Casey sighed, shaking her head. "Liv, I know, it's just that this isn't... this isn't your normal abuse case. It's hard to explain, I... I don't know where to start."

Olivia frowned, then said, "Why not at the beginning? Why did you suspect abuse in the first place?"

No, no, no, she wasn't ready to tell her deepest, darkest secret yet. She didn't want to lie, but she wouldn't tell the truth, either. She wasn't ready to do this. "Olivia, I can't tell you now. I can't. Just... leave it, okay?"

The detective hesitated before nodding slowly. After all, she hadn't expected for Casey to admit being abused so soon. She didn't want to make her go farther than she was comfortable. "All right, I'll leave it alone, for now... Casey, let me call the precinct for a sec, okay? They need to call the ADA who's been standing in for you the past few days, to tell her about Mark."

Casey bit her lip uncertainly, not sure if she wanted it to play out like this. But, then again, if Olivia was the one to call the precinct, she wouldn't have to tell the detectives she'd been raped by her own brother. "All right, that's fine." Olivia nodded comfortingly, then patted her shoulder before standing up to go make her phone call. "Wait! Liv," she exclaimed, grabbing her hand anxiously. Olivia looked back uncertainly, and Casey swallowed back her nerves before asking, "Liv, um, could you tell the guys I'm sorry?"

Olivia stared at her, then exclaimed, "Casey, what the hell do you think _you _have to be sorry for?"

Casey sighed, looking away sadly. "Just tell them." Then she let go of the detective's hand and turned away, keeping her face carefully blank. Olivia watched her before slowly backing away, clearly confused. Casey closed her eyes tightly, listening in on the phone conversation to try and distract her from what she was currently feeling.

"Captain? It's Olivia," Casey heard her say from the other room. "Listen, I know today's my day off, but I need to take the next few days off, too... Well, I don't want Casey to be alone right now... she was in the hospital. And I didn't know about this until just recently, either. But that's not the only reason I called... we need an arrest warrant for Mark Novak... He Casey's brother, and we need it for... for rape... Don't you get it, Cap? _Casey_ was his victim. She's the one he raped... Yeah, I know. Yeah... I'm not sure, I'll ask." Olivia came back out and walked over to Casey. "Case, did you get a rape kit?"

She nodded. "Yeah. The results haven't come back yet, though. And Mark isn't even town, Liv, he's on a business trip."

Olivia grimaced, then nodded her thanks and headed back over to the phone. "Yeah, she got a rape kit, Cragen. It's still being processed, but we could probably pick up the rape kit and do it faster at our lab... um, maybe. Once again, I don't know. Give me a second." Olivia headed back over to the ADA again, this time asking, "Is Mark in the system?"

"No, but I got his DNA on a discarded tissue. It's in my desk. Second drawer from the bottom. Should be locked. It should match the stuff from the rape kit, which should be enough to make the judge sign off on a court order for his DNA. My injuries and Linda's testimony should be enough to convict. Shelly's too young, she's only five- uh, sorry," Casey said abruptly, smiling slightly at Olivia. It was her case, she was the victim, and she was still thinking like a lawyer.

"It's fine, Case," Olivia assured her, smiling in amusement before heading back over to the phone. "All right, he's not in the system, but Casey has his DNA on a tissue in her office. It should match the DNA from the rape kit, and... yeah, exactly... all right. I got it. Thanks, Cap... okay, and one more thing- Casey wanted me to tell the guys that 'she's sorry'... I don't know... yeah, sure. Goodbye, Captain." Casey sighed, crossing her arms and staring at her knees. She knew Olivia would ask if she wanted to talk about it, or if she was okay- but she would have no idea how to respond. Last time, no one had asked her those things. In fact, the only time the... what had happened was ever brought up was when Casey herself had mentioned it. She hadn't known at the time but had realized later she'd been trying to prove she was okay to Mark and everybody else… and had also been hoping that someone would finally think of her and ask if she was all right. But no one ever did, and, slowly but surely, she had moved past the stage of shock and denial and it had hurt too much to speak about what Mark had done.

Olivia came out to stand near her again, watching her uncertainly. "Hey, Casey," she said softly and gave her a small smile.

Casey nodded at her and grinned. "Hi."

After a moment, the detective said, "Um... well, ah, it's getting late, maybe we should go to bed." Casey sighed in relief and nodded, smiling again. She had forgotten that Olivia was an SVU detective- and how well she judged people. She must have realized that Casey wasn't ready to talk about it yet. That she wasn't sure what to say or how to say it and just wanted to be left alone, for now.

"Come on," the detective said, gesturing for her to follow. "You're sleeping in my bed tonight. I'll take the couch."

"Oh, no, I don't think so!" Casey said quickly and shook her head. "Liv, this is your place. I'm not going to kick you out of your own bed."

Olivia smiled gently at her, but still shook her head. "No, Casey, you're taking my bed. Besides, you've got broken ribs and a broken hip. There is no way you are sleeping on my couch." Casey blinked in surprise, unable to hold back a tiny smile. In the past, David hadn't even bothered listening to her when she said she thought something was wrong, and he had seen her being... But David was someone she allowed herself to think about even less than Mark. Forcing her thoughts back to her best friend, she marveled at the fact that Olivia was offering her a bed to sleep in and a comforting hand in case she needed it. The difference was amazing.

"Thanks, Olivia," she replied, her voice thick with emotion as she got slowly to her feet and limped back to the detective's room. Olivia followed.

"Here," she said as she pulled out some clothes. "You can wear this; I doubt you want to sleep in hospital sweats."

This simple kindness from the detective was almost enough to make her want to tell Olivia everything. Almost. But it was so shameful. So horrible. And if she told Olivia now their friendship would never be the same.

"Thank you, Liv. Olivia. Thank you so much."

The detective hesitated, then reached out to touch her shoulder and said softly, "Casey, if you need anything at all tonight, you just have to come out and get me. Okay? If you need to talk or... anything."

Casey's chest tightened to the point where she could hardly speak. She could only nod and smile. Olivia squeezed her shoulder before heading back out to the couch, leaving the ADA alone. After a moment passed, she could not hold it in any longer. With Olivia's presence and her soft questions and her comforting embraces, the denial she had fallen back upon last time wasn't there. It wouldn't support her. She cried silently as she struggled to dress in the shorts and tanktop Olivia had left for her, then curled up in bed and cried herself to sleep. Just like she had last time.

Please review


	6. Chapter 6

Thanks to Fayth in the Music, LiveLoveLikeMe, 7Seven7, Kimblee Whitehead, and Jessica-loves-Katie for reviewing.

Fayth: Did you do something different when you sent this chapter to me? I could read your bolded notes at the top fine, but everything else was so small I could barely see it.

**Chapter 6**

Cragen sighed, looking out at his squad, who was working on their DD5s and talking amongst themselves. He hadn't told them about Casey's rape yet. He had gotten off the phone with Olivia ten minutes ago.

Well, there was no use in postponing this. They would find out sooner or later.

He got to his feet and walked out of his office, looking around the squad room. Munch was over getting coffee, Elliot and Fin were working on paperwork. He cleared his throat and said, "Everybody, we have a new case."

Fin got to his feet, putting his coat on, while Munch walked back over to his desk. "What hospital?"

"Um... no hospital. Olivia said she'd bring her in tomorrow to give her statement, but we already know who raped her."

Elliot looked up in confusion as well, then asked, "So do you need us to go pick him up, or...?"

Cragen shook his head. "No, we can't yet. We need a warrant, and I'm not going to do anything to jeopardize this case."

His detectives were giving him strange looks- not that Cragen was surprised. He was stalling and he knew it. "Um... Captain, what's different about this case? Do we know the victim or something?"

He swallowed, then nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, we know her. It's Casey."

The entire squad stared at him in shock for a moment, then got to their feet and moved closer to him. "What?" Elliot exclaimed in horror. "_Casey's_ our rape victim? As in Casey _Novak?_ Our Casey?" he demanded.

Cragen nodded solemnly, and Munch swore before kicking the side of his desk. "God damn it! Mark did this, I just know it! God, I am going to kill that mother of fu-"

"Wait, wait, wait," Elliot exclaimed, raising hands to stop him like a traffic cop. "Mark? Who the hell is Mark?"

Munch looked around at the others, who were staring at him in surprise, then sighed and crossing his arms, shaking his head. "About three months ago, right before we started calling Serena if we needed a warrant at night, Casey called me at one in the morning saying she needed help. She could barely stand on her own and was covered in bruises. I brought her to the hospital and on the way, she told it was her abusive boyfriend Mark. I called Olivia because she wouldn't let me call anybody else- after she came out of the ER, Mark was waiting for her, and she broke up with him. When she kept on showing up to work with bruises, though, Olivia tried to talk to her about it and Casey nearly bit her head off and said if she couldn't drop it, then they couldn't be friends anymore... he has to be behind this."

Cragen shook his head quickly before Elliot and Fin could start shouting at Munch and exclaimed, "You guys, it wasn't her boyfriend."

Elliot frowned in confusion, then asked, "What, then? A 'friend', or a stranger, or..."

He didn't want to say it, but knew his squad wasn't going to guess it on their own. Cragen shook his head before saying, "Um... it wasn't... she was raped by Mark, but he's not her boyfriend. He's her brother." His three detectives stared at him in horror, unable to process that their best friend had been raped by her own brother.

"What... oh my god... she was raped by..." Cragen nodded at Elliot in understanding. "Wait a minute- I went by her place a couple days ago and the landlord said she'd moved out. When I found her the next day she said she had moved out three months ago and was living with family- do you think that she was-"

They all looked at each other in horror at what Elliot was implying before Munch gasped, "Three month ago? But... but that was when Casey was in the ER- oh, god. Do you think she's been living with her brother- her rapist for... three months?"

There was silence for a moment before Fin cut in urgently. "Wait a minute- but Casey hasn't been at work for the past three days. She hasn't been answering her cell phone and none of us have seen her... do you think it's a coincidence that three days after she disappears after the face of the earth, she turns up after her brother _rapes_ her?"

"Well, Liv said she'd been in the hospital…" Cragen trailed off uncertainly.

"I can't believe that bastard did this to her," Munch muttered under his breath. They all nodded in agreement, mirror expressions of fury covering their faces. Struggling to control his temper, Cragen continued, "Look, Casey will be in tomorrow to give her statement, we can see her then- she probably wants to be alone right now. After that, we find this son of a bitch and throw his ass in Riker's. As of now, we can't do anything... also, Olivia said that Casey wanted to tell us that 'she's sorry'. Do any of you know what she was talking about?"

They all looked around at each other, seeing if the others understood what they did not. Finally, Elliot shook his head and said, "No. No, I can't think of _anything_ the poor girl's got to be sorry for."

The three detectives nodded together, remaining still for a moment before going to deal with it all in their own private ways. Fin clenched his hands into fists and stormed back over to his desk to distract himself with work, Munch headed to the roof, and Elliot stormed off to the locker room. Without Olivia there to calm him down, he continued punching his locker until his knuckles were bloody.

SVUSVUSVU

Olivia walked into her bedroom slowly, smiling at the sleeping form in her bed. It was almost noon, and Casey still hadn't stirred from her coma-like sleep. She knew she had to bring Casey down to the precinct to give her statement, but she didn't want to wake the ADA up. She looked exhausted- and the painful look that had never left her face when she'd been conscious had left her in her sleep. When she was awake, her expression had always been carefully arranged to look normal. Now that it was unguarded, her red hair falling across her face, her eyes closed... she looked so innocent. It was impossible that she could look like that after what her own brother had done... but she did.

It nearly broke Olivia's heart to wake her up, but she knew she would have to. She had to give her statement or later, and if the ADA wanted any sleep tonight, she would have to get up soon. "Casey," she said softly, sitting gently on the edge of her bed and shaking her shoulder softly. "Casey, sweetie, wake up. It's time to get up now, Casey."

The ADA frowned slightly, then gasped and sat bolt upright. "It's okay, Linda, I'm coming, I'm coming, I've got Mark, you're safe," she said in a rush, moving to stand up, then crying out in pain.

Olivia put a hand on her shoulder, rubbing it soothingly as she said, "Hey, hey, Case, it's okay. It's okay, baby, you're safe. Mark's not here." Casey blinked, then frowned at her in confusion, clearly uncertain of what was going on.

Then she blinked and sighed, looking away in embarrassment. "Ah... I... I'm sorry, Liv. Force of habit."

"It's okay, Case," she assured the ADA, rubbing small circles into her back. "Not a problem." Casey sighed and rubbed her eyes sleepily, leaning back on the bed and closing her eyes, still embarrassed. Olivia winced when she saw how ashamed she was, wishing she could kill Mark for hurting her best friend this badly. "Case, come on," she said softly after a moment, standing upright and holding out her hand to the ADA. "I made breakfast... well, lunch."

Once again, Olivia was surprised when Casey's eyes filled with tears and she looked away, hurriedly wiping them away with her hands, her cheeks flaming red. "I... I'm sorry, Casey, I didn't mean to upset you, I-"

"No!" Casey said quickly as more tears formed in her eyes again, despite her best efforts to stop them. "No, you didn't upset me, Olivia, I... it's just because I don't feel like that I... never mind." She looked away again before grabbing her crutches and getting slowly to her feet, avoiding the detective's gaze. She didn't want to tell her that she didn't feel as if she deserved Olivia to be so kind. Because then she would have to explain why, and she wasn't ready for that yet.

She could tell Olivia wanted to ask what was wrong, but that she knew the ADA wasn't ready to talk about what had happened. That she wasn't able to tell everything that had happened in the past.

After brushing off Casey's many assurances that she didn't have to make her lunch, Olivia leaned across the table and said softly, "Case, um... well, I need to take you down to the precinct sooner or later so you can give your statement, and... well, if you're up to it, I can drive you down there and take your statement. Just me and you in that room, girl to girl."

Casey nodded quickly, wanting to prove that she was strong enough. Able to keep living, despite what Mark had done to her. "Thanks, that'd be great, Olivia."

Olivia frowned, watching the ADA carefully arrange her features into a blank mask. She'd acted like Olivia's offer to take her statement was akin to her offering her a ride or a date for drinks, when they both knew it was more serious than that. In fact, she'd been like that yesterday, too- acting as if being raped by her brother wasn't a big deal. If anything, Casey's attitude towards being raped was concerning her. She didn't expect her to be okay, to be acting as if all was well, and didn't want her to be. "Casey," she started gently after a moment, "Are you sure you're okay?"

The ADA answered without looking at her. "I don't recall ever saying I was okay."

Olivia looked her over carefully, assessing her state of mind before asking, "Are you okay?"

'Yes. No. I don't know." Casey sighed, leaning back in her chair and shaking her head. "I don't know, maybe. I just thought thinks would be... different, after he..."

The detective hesitated, then finally asked the question that had been on her mind since she'd found out about the rape. "Casey, why did you stay with him? Because most people in abusive relationships, they never admit that he beat or raped them. But you do, easily. So you must of known it was only going to get worse."

She shrugged easily. "Yeah, I did, that was what I was counting on. But, to answer your questions, I stayed with him for Linda and Shelly. I didn't know he was hurting them, I swear, or I would of moved in sooner. I swear to god, I wasn't letting them be hurt on purpose, I was just too scared to go and make sure that he..." Shaking her head, Casey forced herself to move on. Her private guilt could be dealt with later. "Look, I knew Mark wouldn't hurt me. Well, I knew he would, but I knew he wouldn't kill me. Linda or Shelly, I wasn't too sure about. And I'd rather spend a couple days in the hospital, get a few broken bones, then go to two funerals."

Casey knew that unless she told Olivia the missing piece of the puzzle, her questions would never be answered. Olivia really wanted to know why she had taken the beatings for her family, why she had been willing to let herself be raped on the off chance it could help them, and how she had known about the abuse in the first place. And all those questions could be answered if she just told Olivia what had happened... but no. She couldn't do that. She wasn't ready.

"Casey... but I don't understand. How did you manage to do it? How did you survive, being hit every day just for the sake of-"

"Olivia, you don't understand. You probably never will unless I... but I can't. I'm sorry, Liv, but I just can't tell you."

The detective hid her expression well, but Casey could tell that Olivia was hurt by the fact that Casey was acting as if she couldn't trust her. It made her hurt with the shame of it- her best friend thought that she couldn't trust her. God, Casey wanted to scream the truth, but she had told no one. She couldn't tell anyone. It was too horrible for her to say out loud.

Before she could stop herself, Casey exclaimed, "Please understand, Olivia! It's not that I don't trust you, I do! I want nothing more than to tell you the truth, but... but if I do, then you'll be obligated to tell the squad, because it's evidence, but it could jeopardize the case against Mark, and I don't want to put you in that position. And I, uh... I don't... I mean, I've never told anyone before. I'm not sure how..."

Olivia leaned across the table, slowly taking Casey's hand into hers. "Case, all you have to do is tell me. And how could it hurt your case against Mark?"

"Because I know how those defense attorneys work, Olivia! You would have to report this, and when it got entered into evidence, the defense attorney would try to disprove it. The only thing supporting that I'm telling the truth is my word, and there's a million and one things stacked up against me. You know what would happen then? That defense attorney would yell it out to the entire court and say that I was lying, which would discredit my current testimony and could damage my chances at a conviction. And I am not letting that son of a bitch get near Shelly and Linda again, no matter what." Olivia blinked at the fire in her eyes, and it was clear that Casey would rather die then let Shelly and Linda get hurt by Mark.

She hesitated, then decided it would be worthless to try and convince Casey to tell her secret now. "All right, Case, I won't force you to tell me if you don't want to. But... after the trial... will you at least consider telling me? I just want to help you."

Casey bit her lip uncertainly, and was about to reply when her cell phone started ringing. She gave an apologetic smile to the detective and grabbed it off the table, her eyes widening in surprise when she saw Linda's number flashing across her screen. "Hello?"

"Casey, it's Linda. I have bad news. Really bad news. Mark just called, his business trip ended early and he just got back to New York, he'll be home in half an hour. I can leave with Shelly but if I'm not there when he comes back, then he's-"

"Oh, don't worry, ma'am!" Casey exclaimed, keeping her voice deliberately cheerful so as not to worry Olivia. "I'm back at work today, you just head on out and tell him that you'll be at my office, okay? Then you really go on over to a friend's house, and he'll show up at my office and I can kick his ass."

"Um... Casey? What are you talking about?" Linda asked in confusion.

She sighed, then exclaimed, "Come on, don't you remember? Our plan for his birthday?"

It took Linda a moment to get what Casey was telling her. "Oh, I get it. Of course I can do this, Casey- but there is no way in hell that I am ever letting you get hit by-"

"Yeah, that's wonderful, I'll see you soon. Bye." Casey hung up in the middle of Linda's furious exclamation that she wouldn't let Casey take her place again and hung up before looking back up at Olivia and shrugging helplessly. "I'm sorry, Liv, I have to go down to my office. It should only take a couple minutes." Casey was going to her office for the security cameras, so that when he beat her again, the cameras would catch him coming into the DA's office right about the time she was being hit. It would back up her case against him.

Olivia didn't seem suspicious. "Oh, okay. I'll drop you off, then come back in, say, an hour to bring you back to the precinct so you can give your statement?"

Casey hesitated, knowing that, in all likelihood, Mark was going to knock her unconscious, then said, "Um, could you make that half an hour? It shouldn't take too long.

She nodded. "All right, sure. I'll be in front of the DA's office, waiting." Olivia stood up and collected the dishes while Casey got slowly to her feet and limped back to Olivia's bedroom.

"Hey," she called over her shoulder, "You mind if I borrow a suit to wear? All mine are at Mark's place, and..."

"Yeah, sure. I think I have a suit or two stashed back there." Sighing in relief and suppressing the sense of guilt she felt because she was lying to her best friend, but she knew it was necessary. He wouldn't kill her, she would be fine, and then he would be arrested and taken out of Linda and Shelly's lives forever.

Casey dressed slowly, concentrating on keeping her right leg still and trying to keep her broken ribs steady, not wanting to experience more pain than necessary. Olivia knocked on the closed door eventually and called, "Casey, it's me. Do you, ah… do you need any help getting dressed?"

Casey winced in pain and embarrassment, then said, "No, I'm okay. Thanks though."

"All right. You can call me if you need anything," Olivia said gently, and Casey bit her lip and stared at her feet as tears burned in her eyes. She didn't want to lie to Olivia again. Olivia was her best friend... but she had no choice. Not anymore.

She could only hope that Mark wouldn't rape her again.

SVUSVUSVU\

Casey shifted nervously in her desk chair, her crutches hidden in her office closet. Despite the fact that it was necessary, Casey was so nervous she was about to throw up. She didn't want Mark to hit her again. The cold, hard truth was, she was scared of him. She was scared of being hit again. She didn't want to feel the hurt. She. Didn't. Want. To.

She knew it was a childish reaction, to stomp her foot and cry and scream _'I don't want to!'_ Little, spoiled brats reacted like that, but Casey was strong enough to get through this. She had to be strong enough survive- it would keep Linda and Shelly safe, and that was all that mattered.

However, logic didn't stop her from being afraid when Mark stormed into her office, slamming the door behind him. He stood furiously in front of her desk, his hands clenched into fists, his eyes cold with fury. Casey didn't bother pretending not to know what it was about. She stood up, being careful only to put her weight on her left leg and drew herself up to her full height and meeting his eye. "Mark?"

"You bitch," he growled advancing on her. "I'm a hell of a lot smarter than you; I know what you're doing. How dare you try to keep my daughter away from me?"

Casey bit back the truthful response and knew that she had to goad him into attacking her. "I'm not letting you touch your daughter, Mark. I'm strong enough to keep you off her. I'm stronger than you, Mark, you can't beat me." His eyes widened in anger and he took another threatening step forward, but Casey was too far gone to care. She knew he was going to attack her, and the sooner, the better, so she could just get it over with. "Come on, Mark. You think you're strong enough? _You think you're stronger than me, Mark?_ Huh? _Huh?_"

That was enough. It was enough to provoke Mark into action. He launched himself across the desk and forced her back against the wall, smashing his fist into her face. "Oh, we'll just see about that, you bitch!" Mark pinned her arms above her head so she couldn't fight back and started hitting her again, and again, and again. Since she could only stand on one leg and couldn't use her right one, she was stuck. Casey cried out and felt her lip split, closing her eyes and allowing him to hit her, terror coursing through her veins.

Please review


	7. Chapter 7

First off, I sincerely apologize for the long wait. My beta was very sick, and then the Docx just quit working. She tried to send the file to me eight times and it didn't work, so, this chapter is unbetaed. From now on, I will at least update every week if she hasn't managed to send me the file beforehand so this doesn't happen again. Also, thanks to Anonymous for reviewing (3 times, though I think that was the site's screw up), Kimblee Whitehead, and maigonokaze for reviewing.

**Chapter 7**

Olivia sighed and glared at her watch. It was fifteen minutes after Casey had said to pick her up and she still wasn't answering her cell phone. Considering the circumstances, she was unhappy to leave the ADA alone like this and wanted to be with her, to protect her. She didn't want her to get hurt and was going to kill Mark if he ever touched her again.

She bit her lip uncertainly, wringing her hands out before getting out of the car to go to Casey's office. She was probably just running late and her phone was just dead. That was all.

She hoped.

SVUSVUSVU

Olivia walked down to Casey's office, trying to suppress her worry. She knocked on the ADA's door with a shaking fist and called, "Casey? It's Olivia. You in there?" No reply. "_Casey?_" Once again, no reply. She tried the knob, but it wasn't locked, which is what really worried her. Casey always locked her door, even if she was inside, to discourage people from coming in and giving her more work. She hesitantly opened the door, then screamed.

Casey's office was in shambles, her lamp broken in half, her furniture thrown across the office and turned upside down, her desk on it's a side and covered in blood. Olivia had seen a hell of a lot of crime scenes just like this one, but that wasn't what made this so horrible.

Sprawled on her side beside her overturned desk, her right leg bent in a way that it shouldn't be able to naturally, her pale complexion so covered with dark bruises and cuts Olivia almost couldn't recognize her, was Casey.

"_Casey!_" Olivia shouted, running to her friend in a panic, kneeling by her side frantically and feeling for her pulse. "Casey, baby? Can you hear me? Casey, please!" But it was worthless- Casey was out cold. Allowing her cop personality to rule while her heart was going crazy, Olivia dialed 911 while keeping a firm grip on Casey's limp hand.

"Hang on, sweetheart," she murmured, stroking her hand across Casey's bloody and bruised forehead, trying to hold back tears. She told the operator to have the EMTs ask the clerk for Casey Novak's office, then hung up in the middle of the instruction to stay on the line. "Just hang on for me. You're going to be fine." Her other hand brushed up against Casey's ADA badge, and that sent her on another line of thought- she had to call SVU to tell them about this... to tell them that she had failed and let Mark hurt Casey all over again.

With shaking fingers, she dialed Elliot's number without ever looking away from Casey's bruised face. Elliot must have been waiting for her to call, because he answered with, "Olivia, where the hell are you with Casey? You were supposed to-"

"Elliot, just shut up!" she screamed, too frantic to try and keep her tone under control. "Just shut the hell up and listen to me! It's Casey! I'm in her office and she- and Mark- someone attacked her, Elliot! She's barely breathing and covered in blood, and..." she trailed off weakly, still smoothing her hand over Casey's forehead and wincing when she felt blood get on it.

Elliot didn't say anything for a moment, then gasped, "Oh my god. Oh, god... Did you call a bus?"

"Yeah, yeah, it's on the way," Olivia said quickly, looking over Casey nervously.

There was another moment of silence before he said, "I'll tell the rest of the squad and try to get down to her office before the ambulance shows up." Olivia thanked him quickly before hanging up and dropping her cell phone, clasping her hand around Casey's.

"You're going to be okay, Case," she assured the ADA again, tears in her eyes as she leaned down to kiss Casey's bloody, swollen cheek. "You're going to be okay."

She wasn't sure how long it took the ambulance to get there- every second seemed to take forever. But, finally, the two EMTs hurried into Casey's office- Olivia thanked god that it was Saturday and the traffic was lighter than usual. Otherwise, they could of arrived too late and...

Olivia scooted back slightly but still kept a firm grip on Casey's hand as the EMTs worked on her. She nearly fainted when she saw them stabilizing her neck and putting her on the backboard. Casey couldn't be that badly hurt, could she? No, no, it was all just a precaution.

Olivia gripped Casey's hand tighter when the EMT put the oxygen bag in her mouth, rhythmically pumping oxygen into the ADA's lungs. Swallowing back the lump in her throat, Olivia stood up when they put Casey on the stretcher and began wheeling her out the door, still without letting go of her hand. God, god, god, it was horrible. Cervical collar, backboard- in case of neck trauma or, god forbid, a spinal chord injury. Oxygen bag because she wasn't breathing right... god, god, god... The blanket wrapped around her cold, trembling body to keep her core body temperature up, to stop hypothermia. God, it was horrible, this was so horrible. She couldn't believe this was happening. She had left Casey alone for 45 minutes and Mark had done _this_...

Elliot did arrive, right as they were taking Casey out to the ambulance. "Olivia!" he called out to get her attention. "Liv, how's she doing?"

She shrugged helplessly as she climbed into the ambulance after Casey. "She's still out- El, do you think that Mark-"

"-is behind this? Hell yes. I'll meet you at the hospital; the others are looking for that son of a bitch."

Olivia nodded before the ambulance doors closed as they were on their way to the hospital. She kept a protective hand on the ADA's shoulder, trying to stop trembling. "Is she going to be okay?" She asked the EMT who wasn't responsible for Casey's breathing.

He could only shrug apologetically. "It's too soon to tell, ma'am. She's probably a concussion and some broken bones; looks like she's lost a lot of blood. Do you know her blood type?"

She nodded weakly, unable to believe that she had let Mark do this to her best friend. "A positive," she mumbled, remembering when she had helped Casey fill out her admittance forms after being attacked in her office. She cleared her throat as she continued to rub her thumb across Casey's shoulder. She was going to kill Mark. She was going to find him and beat him like he had beaten Casey, make him hurt for doing this to her friend.

When they got to the hospital, the doctors wouldn't let her stay with Casey and made her go out to the waiting room. True to his word, Elliot arrived less than a minute later, having followed the ambulance to the hospital. She shook her head in response to his questioning look and said, "I don't know. All I can tell you is that she was breathing."

Elliot grimaced, shaking his head, then said, "Munch and Fin are processing her office and Cragen is pulling in a favor she we get to _investigate_ this attack even though it wasn't sexual assault. Ha, investigate. Like we don't know who's behind this."

Olivia nodded in agreement. "I know. That son of a bitch."

The male detective watched his partner for a moment before finally asking, "Liv, did she tell you about... before the rape? All the bruises and casts she kept showing up to work with? Were they..."

She hesitated, not sure of what to tell him. Casey hadn't outright said what she had been through these past three months, but she could guess. "Well, Casey didn't tell me, but I'm pretty sure he's behind everything." Elliot just sighed and sat down, shaking his head. Olivia knew exactly what he was thinking- how they could of been so blind to their best friend being abused.

SVUSVUSVU

"Look," Munch said, pointing at the drawer on Casey's desk where she had hidden the DNA evidence. The desk had been flipped on it's side and, in the havoc, the lock had broken. "At least we don't have to spend our time picking the lock now."

Fin nodded as he stepped carefully over the broken glass on the floor to reach the desk. "Yeah. We already got the rape kit sent over to our lab, and Melinda should be able to match the two pretty quick- huh?" Fin frowned as he opened the drawer- the tissue was in there, but so was a sheet of paper, covered with dates and names scrawled Casey's handwriting.

"What's this?" Munch asked in confusion, scanning the list. "Anna Smith, McGreen Hospital in Buffalo, June 3rd, dislocated shoulder and three stitches? Georgia Rolsten, Mercy General in Buffalo, June 5th, concussion and sprained ankle- god, Fin, there's one for almost every day, all the way back to May. That's three months ago..."

"When she started living with Mark," Fin finished. "You don't think..."

"That these are the fake names and hospitals she went to every time Mark beat her bad enough? God, there has to be at least a hundred records here... and look at some of these injuries- four broken ribs, fifteen stitches, broken hand- how could we have missed this?"

"She must have taken the casts off so we wouldn't notice," Fin said slowly, shaking his head. "Hell. I can't believe we didn't notice any of this..."

Munch glanced over at one of the crime scene techs before directing him to take over the crime scene. "Come on, Fin. We need to tell El and Liv about this- and the ADA assigned to this case. And then..."

"We have to get started on getting all these records from the hospitals." Fin sighed, neither one of them looking forward to searching through their friend's extensive list of injuries but knowing they had no choice.

SVUSVUSVU

Elliot walked back into the waiting room after calling the precinct for an update to find Olivia talking to the doctor. He hurried over to them, in the middle of the doctor saying, "It'll probably be a couple hours before we can get her admitted, but she's stable now, so you can go sit with her."

Olivia nodded in relief, then followed the doctor back into the ER, gesturing for Elliot to come after her. "Is she awake?"

The doctor shrugged and said, "She's in and out, but when's she awake, she's mostly incoherent. Don't be concerned if she doesn't seem to hear you or respond to anything you say- because of the different medications and concussion, she probably won't be fully conscious for about eight, ten hours."

She sighed, trying to suppress the guilt she felt at leaving Casey alone, less than a week after her brother had raped her. The doctor showed them where Casey was, then left them alone, telling he would be back to check on Casey soon. The detectives walked forward slowly, looking down at their unconscious friend nervously, not wanting to see the signs of the vicious beating, ones that she had probably been receiving for the past three months, and that they had done nothing to stop.

Casey was mumbling restlessly in her sleep, turning her head from side to side occasionally and balling her hospital gown in her fists. Her pale face was covered in dark bruises in shades of purple and red, and there was a long cut on her forehead, half hidden by the fringe of her hair. The doctors had cleaned her up, but they hadn't done too good a job- there was still some dried blood under her nose and on her lip. There was a bandage on her upper right arm and multiple IV lines leading to her weakly thrashing body and an oxygen tube under nose.

Elliot's gaze lingered on the lump under the sheet where her right leg should be and pulled the sheet back, frowning at the cast it revealed. "What's wrong with her?" he asked softly, clenching his hands into fists and trying not to hit something.

"Once again," Olivia started quietly, "I'm not sure how many of her injuries are from former... former beatings, but he broke her leg, and... and five ribs, her finger- that one's probably from fighting back- and over twenty stitches... pretty severe concussion... luckily, her hip wasn't hurt too badly- if it had been, she might never have been able to walk again, but she's just gonna be on crutches for an extra month or two... she'll be okay. Physically, at least."

Elliot swallowed hard, reaching down to Casey's cold, IV-riddled hand and brushed the red, bloody cuts on her knuckles- defensive wounds. "She did fight back," he observed softly. "Good girl," he murmured in Casey's ear, then kissed her forehead.

Casey stirred slightly, moaning at his touch. "Stop," she muttered, pushing at him weakly. "Stop." Her voice cracked, then, and she fell silent, turning away from him.

Elliot and Olivia looked at each other uncertainly before Olivia sat next to her on the bed and asked, "Casey? Hun, can you hear me?"

The ADA lay still for another few moments, then gasped and sat upright with a cry of pain before mumbling through a bleary, narcotic-induced haze, stopping and starting without eloquence, "Linda, it's s'okay, I'm comin'. I got ya, you're safe. Gimmie a sec, I got Mark-"

"Casey!" Elliot exclaimed, moving into her line of vision and putting a gentle hand on her shoulder, but Casey recoiled from his touch and whimpered softly, eyes wide with fear.

Olivia gestured hurriedly for her partner to back up as she grasped Casey's hands, trying to calm her. "It's all right, Case," she soothed, "Mark isn't here right now. You're safe, baby."

Casey blinked slowly before sighing and lying back down, wincing as she did so. "Oh, god, that hurts," she mumbled under her breath, closing her eyes from the pain. "Wha... what's going on?"

The detectives weren't surprised she didn't remember- the physical and emotional trauma alone... Olivia leaned forward, squeezing Casey's hand. "You're, um... you're in the hospital. Mark found you in your office, and he... he beat you up pretty bad."

Casey blinked, then nodded slowly. "Oh... oh, yeah, I remember."

Olivia and Elliot glanced nervously at each other before Elliot sat on the other side of her bed and asked, "Casey, you remember what Mark did?"

It was hard for them to tell, but Olivia thought she saw Casey blush through the bruising on her face. "No... no, that's not what... I remember waiting for him in my office, to..." She blinked, then fell silent, realizing that, in her drug-induced haze, she had said far too much.

Elliot turned to glare at Olivia, who exclaimed, "Casey! You knew he was going to come and hurt you?" Casey looked down like a child who was being scolded, her eyes brimming with tears as Olivia continued, "How could you? Case, all you had to do was tell us, and we would of stayed with you and arrested him- we _never_ would of let him hurt you!"

Casey tucked her chin against her chest and wrapped her arms tightly around herself, closing her eyes tightly and trying to stop the tears. "I'm sorry, 'Livia, Elliot. I'm really sorry. I never should of done this. I'm so sorry," she pleaded without looking at them, shaking her head back and forth.

Olivia was momentarily surprised at her reaction before remembering how horribly Casey had been treated for the past three months. No one wonder she was acting like a misbehaving child who had done something terrible- that's what Mark had treated her like that almost every night. "Casey... Case, I'm sorry. It's okay, honey, I'm not mad at you."

"Neither am I," Elliot clarified, reaching out to grasp Casey's hand as well. "Sweetie, no one blames you for this. You just got in over your head, now, and we're going to help you get out." He leaned down and kissed Casey's forehead again, squeezing his shoulder gently.

Casey looked away, embarrassed, her eyes tearing up again. "I'm sorry," she repeated hollowly, shifting uncomfortably and looking away. "So sorry..."

"Don't apologize, sweetie," Olivia told her softly, rubbing her arm gently. "You have nothing to apologize for." Casey sighed sadly, looking between the both of them guiltily before leaning her head back onto the uncomfortable hospital bed and she was out again.

Please review


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks to Anonymous for reviewing. And I have no idea what happened to my beta; no updates on her stories or messages from her in nearly a month now. I will now be updating once every two days, but these chapters will be unbetaed… let the story continue…

**Chapter 8**

Fin got off the phone with the last hospital Casey had been to these past three months. "Well, that's the seventh hospital, the _sixty__fifth_ alias. That's sixty five times she went to the hospital and we didn't notice." He slammed the phone back onto the cradle.

Munch glanced up from where he stood by the fax machine, where hospitals from New York and Buffalo were sending in files, all with different names, different injuries, but the pictures were all of the same woman. "Fin, there was no way that any of us could of found out. Casey didn't want us to know and she hid it too well."

"So what, Munch? We're detectives- _SVU_ detectives, for god's sakes!" Fin snapped bitterly. "We work with battered women every god damn day, but when our own friend is one, we fail to recognize it. She needed us, and... we let her down."

Munch could only shrug- he was just as lost and mad as Fin. He didn't know why Casey had hid this from them, it wasn't making any sense. Why had she felt so guilty that she had lived in pure hell, just to save her sister-in-law and niece from it?

Shaking their heads, the two detectives got back to work. Right now, that was the only thing they could do to help Casey. Munch handed a stack of the new files to Fin so he could start looking through them for anything that jumped out. After a few moments, he called Munch back over and gestured for him to look at one of the photos. It was of Casey's face- the doctor were measuring the size of a gigantic bruise on the side of her head, but that wasn't what Fin wanted him to see. It was her eyes.

Normally, Casey's green eyes held a fierce fire of determination, one that said she was never going to give up, that showed how she was strong as hell. But in the picture, she was staring down, off to the side, her eyes dark and sad, her body limp and pale... it was like the fight had gone out of her. "God. She must have felt so alone..." Fin trailed off- despite his tough exterior, he had a soft spot for their tough as nails ADA, and he hated to see her like this.

Munch hesitated before shaking his head and looking away. "Am I the only one who wants to beat this son of a bitch to hell and back?"

"Hey, make sure you save a piece for me." Munch sighed and smiled slightly before heading back over to the fax machine, where the files had stacked up in his short absence. Picture after picture of whatever alias Casey chose to use, covered in bruises from head to toe. Some of the pictures, of severe bruising on her inner thighs, they felt sick looking at it and as if they were invading their friend's privacy. The only thing that kept them going was the fact that they didn't want to give this case off to someone who didn't know Casey, who didn't care about her. She deserved better than the best, and none of them wanted her talking to some cruel detective with too much on their plate so they neglected the ADA's case, made her repeat her story a hundred times, didn't respect her- besides, this was the only case they could focus on right now.

SVUSVUSVU

"Who are you?" Elliot demanded, standing up and putting a protective hand on the unconscious ADA's shoulder when a short woman and a little kid entered Casey's hospital room.

The woman said meekly, "I'm Linda Novak, and this is my daughter, Shelly... I'm Casey's friend."

"Relax, Elliot," Olivia said, waving him off and smiling at him. "I saw her at Casey's office a couple months back- from what I saw, she has to be Linda, and this little one can only be Shelly." The small girl clung nervously to her mother's side, both her tiny hands grasping Linda's arm. The older woman was pale and shaking slightly, her eyes wide and scared.

Linda nodded weakly at Olivia. "Yes... Yes, I am- thank you, ma'am. Um... is Casey... is she going to be okay? The doctor hung up before I could ask."

Elliot, still without removing his hand from Casey's shoulder, nodded. "Yeah, she'll be okay. Some broken bones, stitches, but Casey's tough."

Linda looked down, her face contorting in pain, and thanked him before sobbing lightly. She approached Casey's bedside slowly, holding tightly onto her daughter's hand, and when she finally got a good look at the lawyer's form she sobbed again. "God, Casey... I'm so sorry." She sat on the edge of Casey's bed and kissed her hand, shaking her head tearfully.

"Mama?" Shelly asked nervously. "Mama, what's wrong with Aunt Casey? Did Daddy hit her again?"

Linda hoisted the little girl up onto her lap and buried her face in her hair. "Shelly... Shelly, I'm so sorry, but… yes. I know you want Daddy home with us, but... he hurt Aunt Casey, and he hurt you. He's not going to stop, Shelly- I'm so sorry..."

Shelly just shrugged. "That's okay. I don't like Daddy when he gets mad, and he's mad all the time now." Linda looked down at her daughter in surprise before rubbing her shoulder softly and kissing her forehead. "Mama... why does Daddy hurt Aunt Casey so bad? He never hurts you or me like that."

Elliot and Olivia were standing off to the side and trying to contain their anger while Linda stroked her daughter's hair without ever taking her eyes off Casey. "See, your father... when he gets mad, he hits people. Aunt Casey makes him mad because if he gets mad enough, she can take him away from us and he can never hurt us again. She just may have pushed him farther than usual this time..."

Shelly sighed, before crawling out of her mother's arms and up closer to Casey, like she had when the ADA had broken her hip, and shook her by her shoulders. "Aunt Casey... Aunt Casey, wake up, I wanna talk to you. Aunt Casey!" she cried, working herself up to hysterics when the unconscious woman wouldn't wake up. The little girl had seen her aunt and mother being beaten by her father for possibly all her life. When she saw her aunt and her savoir covered in bruises and not responding when she called her name, it seemed to the little five year old as if Casey was dead. "_Aunt__Casey!_" she screamed, shaking her again.

Apologizing profusely, Linda picked up the screaming child and carried her away from Casey, who was tossing and turning restlessly at the sound of the hysterical young girl. She moaned loudly in her medicated sleep, shaking her head weakly. Her brow furrowed and her she pulled her hands out of the detectives' grips, still trembling.

"Casey," Elliot soothed, stroking her hair softly, trying to calm her. "Casey, it's all right. You're okay, you're safe."

But the ADA could not be soothed. She groaned again, the pain in her voice breaking both of the detectives' hearts. She sighed softly before finally opening her bruised, swollen eyes blearily, looking around in confusion. She drew in her breath to ask a question but it caught in her sore, ravaged throat from when Mark had strangled her earlier and she started coughing. One hand clenched at her throat as she tried to catch her breath and stop the painful coughing, to no avail.

"Shh, shh, calm down, sweetie," Olivia told her, grabbing a cup of water off the nightstand and bringing it to Casey's lips, helping her drink it to soothe her sore throat. After several eager gulps, Casey leaned back into the pillows and closed her eyes in shame and blushed, not wanting to see Elliot and Olivia's sympathetic looks.

"Thanks, Liv..." she muttered, ashamed, still not wanting to look at them. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, Case," another voice told her- that one was Elliot. She felt his coarse, rough hand gently rub her shoulder. "You've got nothing to apologize for."

Taking a deep breath and wincing as her ribs protested, Casey forced her eyes open and smiled at the two of them. "Hi," she mumbled meekly, looking in between them uncertainly.

"Hey," Elliot said back, smiling at her. "How are you feeling?"

Casey shrugged weakly, not wanting to answer their question truthfully, not wanting to make her friends worry more than they already were. "Pretty good, actually. They must have me on some pretty nice drugs."

Elliot and Olivia laughed softly, shaking their heads in amusement. They both knew Casey was lying, but it reminded them of the old days, when it was obvious Casey had a cold or the flu, but she would lie and say she was fine. "Yeah, probably... Case, do you remember what happened?"

Casey turned to Olivia and nodded. "Well, not really, but I can guess why I'm here... I remember waiting in my office for Mark to come and start-" Casey cut off sharply, shaking her head quickly and looking away. "God damn it," she muttered under her breath, not realizing that Elliot and Olivia already knew she had been waiting for Mark. "Stupid drugs. Making me say things that aren't true," she offered weakly with a hesitant smile.

Elliot chuckled, shaking his head. "Casey, we already know about the office. You told us in the ER."

Olivia nodded in agreement. "Yeah, you regained consciousness for a bit, sweetie," she told her comfortingly, watching carefully as Casey groaned and covered her face with her hands.

"God, I am so stupid. I never know when to shut up."

The detectives sighed, glancing unhappily at each other before Olivia told her, "Case, Munch and Fin are back at the office, working on your case. They said they found your hospital records in your desk as well as the DNA evidence you had, and they're getting all the files right now. They send their love and want to come by and see you later."

That led Casey to her next question. "How long am I going to be trapped in this hospital?"

They laughed at her, unable to hold back twin smiles as Olivia chuckled, "At the very least, three days, but probably more. The doctor said you ripped some of your stitches out and they had to give you a blood transfusion, and you need to stay off your feet for a couple of days before you heal enough to not rip your stitches out again just by walking around."

"What... what's wrong with me?" Casey asked worriedly, eyes wide with fear.

Elliot bit his lip, trying to find the best way to tell her the long list of injuries without making her feel worse. "Some broken ribs, broken leg, concussion, stitches. Broken finger, too, but that's probably from fighting back." He smiled at her while Casey blushed and looked down, a small grin pulling at her lips.

"Ah... I must have punched him." Her smile grew wider, much to the confusion of Elliot and Olivia. Usually, abuse victims felt guilty for fighting back. "Good," she said viciously, her hands curling into loose fists. "I was stronger, this time around... oh. Um, never mind," she said quickly, offering an insincere smile to the detectives. She blamed the drugs they had her on- she kept making verbal slip ups that, if she continued like this, would lead the detectives to the truth without her ever telling them.

Olivia hesitated before finally saying what was on her mind. "Casey... you've been hiding something, but we're going to find Mark, and we're going to put him away for good. You don't have to hide it anymore. Tell us what's wrong." Casey didn't answer. She knew Olivia was right- after Mark had beat her so severely and there was proof that he was behind it, anything she said now wouldn't make a difference... but, still, she knew she wasn't ready to tell that secret. She didn't want to know. For once, she wanted to maintain just one shred of dignity and keep her deepest, worst secret.

"Olivia, Elliot... I don't... I'm not ready to tell you guys that," she said uncomfortably. "Can you just please respect that?" she asked without looking at them, not wanting to lose her friends but scared to death that they would leave her pathetic ass to deal with everything herself once they knew.

She was thoroughly shocked when Olivia patted her shoulder and said, "It's all right, Casey. You can tell us when you're ready... but you have to trust us. We are going to protect you from Mark; he will _never_ touch you again. I promise."

Casey sighed, looking away. She didn't dare to believe that she was going to be kept safe from Mark. She never had been before, even when it would have been as simple as... no, no use in thinking of that now. She wasn't going to rely on others for protection. She didn't want to be forced to doubt her friendship with these wonderful detectives, and while she didn't believe that that would happen, it... well, she had experience in that matter. She could only trust herself to keep herself safe. She didn't want to risk trusting her closest friends, and then...

As usual, while her mind was thinking only to keep herself safe, her heart was still in love with the detectives, still telling her to trust them. Just like in the past, but look how wrong she had been then.

For god's sakes, she couldn't help it. In situations like this, she shut down and trusted no one but herself- she wasn't even able to trust her closest friends. Casey fought the different urges inside of her, the ones telling her to give up her worst secret to her best friends, the ones instructing her to tell the detectives off and make them leave so she wouldn't have to see their sympathy. She had to just remain calm and pretend that everything was all right. She would deal with this _on__her__own_ and everything would be _fine_. It had to be.

Just then, the phone in her room rang, a welcome distraction from her rather depressing thoughts. Shooting a look at the detectives, she reached for the phone and answered it quickly, "ADA Novak, sex- um, hello?" she amended with a blush.

"Oh, Casey, you're not at work. Don't answer your phone like you are."

It was Mark.

Please review… by the way, this part is that last hurrah for Casey, I'm not gonna make her go through too much more!


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks to LiveLoveLikeMe for reviewing.. still waiting for my beta to reappear…

**Chapter 9**

Casey forced herself to remain quiet- it would probably be a very bad idea for the detectives to find out who she was on the phone with, because he had to have a good reason for calling. "Are you alone?" he asked her.

"No," she said, making herself smile at the detectives.

"Well, then make whoever is with you _leave.__Now!_" he exclaimed harshly, and Casey rushed to comply with his wishes.

Covering the mouthpiece of the phone, she made sure her features were rearranged into a reassuring mask before asking them softly to leave. "It's Linda," she explained.

"Say no more," Olivia told her with a gentle pat on the shoulder before standing up to leave.

Elliot nodded in agreement and followed her out the door. "Call us if you need anything," he told her before leaving her alone.

Sighing in relief, she told Mark, "Okay, I'm alone. Now, what the hell do you want?"

"Look, I'm not an idiot. I know these cops are going to get me. But I want it to be for something that really matters, not just slapping my sister. So, I went into the hospital and knocked out that stupid security guard and Linda and brought Shelly with me. I'm at an abandoned warehouse with a gun to her head- if you don't show up within the next three hours, _alone_, I'm pulling the trigger."

Casey's panicked breath quickened and she tried to remain calm- she had been in a lot worse situations than this. Well, that wasn't true, but she had to handle this. "Tell me the address. And, Mark? I can't get out of this hospital, these two detectives are watching me like hawks."

He gave her the address before telling her, "And you don't need to worry about that. After I hang up with you, give me 60 seconds, and you'll be home free. But not for long, so you have to hurry. You got that address written down?"

Casey hesitated, but she was going to have to take what he threw at her and keep on going. Shelly was depending on her, and this was what she was best at- taking what comes, and keeping on going. She had fought back then and she wasn't about to give up now. "Yes, I have the address. 60 seconds?"

"On the clock," he told her smartly before hanging up. Casey took a deep breath before leaning forward, despite the shockwave of pain it caused, to get Olivia's leather trench coat, left at the foot of her bed. She winced as she pulled it on and buttoned it up to hide the hospital gown before checking the pockets for the detective's wallet- she needed enough money for a cab. She took a deep breath, savoring the last moment of sweet painkillers being pumped into her bloodstream before ripping off the oxygen tube and IV and getting slowly to her feet and looking around for any crutches. She smiled when she saw them perched on a chair in the corner of the room. Olivia must have left them, knowing that she wasn't planning on just lying in bed for the next three days and would raise a screaming fit before she used a wheelchair.

"Thank god for you, Liv," she muttered under her breath before grabbing them and resting her hand on the heart monitor wires attached to her chest, waiting to tear them out until the 60 seconds were up. The doctors would arrive almost immediately once their monitors reported that they no longer sensed a pulse, meaning she didn't have more than a minute to get out of here. "Come on, Mark," she whispered before ripping the wires off and swinging out of the room. Elliot and Olivia were nowhere to be seen and, with the trench coat, none of the doctors noticed that she was a patient. She reached the elevator and sighed with relief when she saw that she would be alone.

All that mattered to her was keeping Shelly safe. Mark was going to hurt her, that fact was very easy to accept- she had never truly believed that she was safe from him, anyway, that was why she wasn't crying right now. She had work to do, and there was no point in wishing things were going better.

The moment Casey had limped out of the hospital, she heard a voice over the intercom announcing that the hospital was on lockdown, and no one was allowed to leave. Security guards walked over to the doors, shutting and locking them, not noticing the triumphant woman outside. She hailed a cab and struggled to get inside, throwing a wad of cash at him and giving him the address to the abandoned address. "And there's an extra hundred in there for you if you speed- I have a cop's badge with me and can get you out of any tickets."

"Enough said," the Mexican driver told her before flooring it.

SVUSVUSVU

"I want someone on those security cameras _now!_" Elliot shouted furiously as he stood over the unconscious bodies of Linda and the security guard, who were currently being tended to by several doctors. After a detective had called, telling him that he and Olivia were Linda and Shellys' security detail, they had headed downstairs to find Shelly gone, with Linda and her current 'protection' knocked out on the floor. Olivia was on her way up to Casey's room right now, moving as fast as she could, since Mark was in the hospital. But now that they were on lockdown, if Mark and Shelly were still in the hospital, they weren't going to escape.

Elliot's cell phone rang, and when he saw that it was Olivia, he answered it immediately. "Olivia, how's Casey?"

"She's gone, Elliot!" 

He froze, eyes widening in shock. "Wait- what? What do you mean she's gone?"

"What the hell do you _think_I mean, Elliot? She's not here! Casey is gone- and so are her crutches, which makes me think she went willingly. I'm making her hospital room a crime scene, though, and-"

"Hang on for a sec, Liv, I've got a call from Cragen," Elliot said before switching over to Cragen. "Captain, we've got a problem."

Cragen hesitated for a moment before saying, "Fin and Munch are on their way to be the security detail for Linda and Shelly- _please_ tell me that was our only problem."

It was Elliot's turn to be confused. "Wait, what? But I thought Liv and I were the security detail?"

"Um, no, why would you think that?"

Elliot frowned, not liking where this conversation was headed. "Because we got a call five minutes ago saying that _we_ were the security detail."

Cragen's voice was worried when he replied, "Elliot, only this squad knows about this case, including the security detail- there is no one who _could_ have called you about that…"

Horrified at the implications of what Cragen was saying, Elliot gasped, "Captain, when Liv and I got down here, Linda and her guard were knocked unconscious and Shelly was gone. Casey's not in her room and no one knows where she is- do you think that Mark was the one who called us?"

Cragen didn't say anything for one long moment before he ordered, "Get your phone to the tech people; see if they can trace that number. Then lockdown that hospital and find them! Fin, Munch, and I are on our way there right now!" Then he hung up, leaving Elliot frantically taking control of the crime scene, his only concern with finding Casey. They had promised her that they would keep her safe from Mark, and he was going to keep that promise. That son of a bitch was never going to touch her again.

SVUSVUSVU

Casey moaned softly in pain as she leaned forward, showing Olivia's police badge to the cop at the window. "I'm Detective Benson, and this is an emergency," Casey assured him. She was probably only saved by the fact that he was a uni- a lower rank than a detective- and he didn't want to mess with her. He backed away and let the taxi speed off again, and Casey gritted her teeth to stop the agonized cry from escaping her lips as she was thrown back against the seat.

This pain was all worth it, though, if she could just save Shelly. And having the man on charges of kidnapping would help a lot in the upcoming court case. That poor little girl had to be okay- if she wasn't, it would be all her fault... _No_, she couldn't think like that! There would be time for guilt later, right now, she had a job to do. She could focus on herself some other time.

Casey suppressed a tiny sob of fear, trying to stop herself from shaking. Thank god her movements were still slow and sluggish from the painkillers, or she would be unable to sit still, to stop the tremors, just like before. Everything was just like before, except now, she was tired and beaten, knowing for a fact that she couldn't handle being alone with Mark... but that didn't matter. Shelly had to be scared out of her mind right now- that was all she could allow herself to think about.

But, the drugs weakened her mental discipline, and she allowed her thoughts to stray to the detectives. She knew how betrayed they were going to feel, how hurt, but she couldn't help it. She would deserve their anger, their furious proclamations of how could she, why wouldn't she trust them, why would she do a thing like this when it was so obviously suicide... but, in her hazy state, any coherent thoughts muffled by narcotics, she was reduced to a more primal, instinctual state, and she had been taught as a child that trusting anyone, _especially_ your closest friends, was a mistake. When threatened, she did not search for others to help, but instead fought through it alone. She knew the detectives would think that this was because she didn't trust them, but it wasn't true- it was going to take her time, though. It was just going to take her time to maybe, _maybe_ realize that it wasn't wrong to trust these amazing people with her life.

The cab swerved around a corner and Casey groaned in pain again, simply hoping that she got to Shelly in time.

SVUSVUSVU

"Can you trace it?" Munch demanded, crossing his arms and watching as one of the tech boys from computer crimes worked on tracing the number that had called Elliot earlier.

He nodded. "Yeah, I think, just give me a sec..." He continued to type away, watching the screen intently, until the location was pinpointed. "There!" he exclaimed triumphantly, pointing at the address flashing on the screen. "That's where that cell phone is right now."

Sighing in relief, Cragen got on the radio and ordered all available units to the abandoned warehouse while Munch called his partner and Elliot and Olivia. "Benson and Stabler are the closest, geographically. They'll get there first. Tell them to hurry," he ordered as he rushed out the door to his car.

Munch did as he was ordered before hanging up and hurrying out to a squad car, where Fin was waiting for him. "We've got to get to the Bronx, now," he told Fin, slamming the door shut as he fumbled with the seatbelt. "That's where Novak is- probably all three of them." Fin nodded and turned on the sirens, driving right out into a traffic jam.

"What the hell?" he shouted, his own car joining the chorus of honking. "Come _on!_"

Munch stuck his head out the window, then swore. "There's construction up ahead- a big mother of fuckin crane is in our way..."

"And the only other way to the Bronx from here would take three hours. Damn it!" shouted Fin, punching the dashboard.

"It's up to Elliot and Olivia now," Munch said, shaking his head furiously. The poor girl was on her own. At least until Elliot and Olivia reached her- they could only hope that their fellow detectives got there in time.

Please review


	10. Chapter 10

LiveLoveLikeMe: So sorry! I had this doc uploaded to the document manager, I must have just clicked on the wrong one! THIS is the right chapter...

**Chapter 10**

The cab finally skidded to a stop outside the abandoned warehouse, where Mark was waiting with Shelly, a gun to the side of her head. "_Hey!_" he shouted, glaring at her furiously. "I thought I told you to come alone, you bitch!"

"How the hell did you even expect me to get here, Mark?" she exclaimed. "I had to take a cab! You, get lost," she told the cab driver, who was staring wide-eyed at the young, terrified girl who was standing there, trembling violently, a gun to her head.

"Too late for that, he's seen too much," Mark said, raising the gun from Shelly for a moment before shooting the cab driver in the arm. Shelly screamed and Casey jumped in shock, looking back at the poor man to make sure he was okay before advancing on Mark. When she got closer, she could see the bruises all over Shelly's shaking body, and she gasped, "_Mark!_ Why the hell did you hit her? I told you I was coming!"

"She was a misbehaving little girl and deserved it!" Mark exclaimed before pulling the little girl back into the warehouse, the gun at her head.

Shelly screamed again, calling out to her. "_Aunt__ Casey!__Help __me!_"

"I'm coming Shells, I'm coming, it's all going to be okay," Casey soothed, limping forward, shaking almost as much as the little girl. "Mark!" she shouted once she was inside the warehouse, glaring at him. "Let her go! Take on someone your own size! It takes work to control someone like me, but the poor kid can't fight you off! You want someone with fight in them, Mark! That's me!"

"I don't know," he said doubtfully. "This kid here fought back."

"She didn't give you a challenge and you know it!" Casey screamed, knowing how much psychological damage she was doing to Shelly right now but knowing it had to be worth it, if it would save the poor girl's life. "_You__want__me!__I__'__m__here,__Mark!__Take__me!_"

Mark hesitated, but when Shelly screamed in terror again, he grabbed the child roughly by the arm and threw her to the side, facing Casey. His hands were balled into fists, his mouth set in a firm scowl, his eyes cold and filled with hate. "You think you can take me, you bitch? You have ruined my life! Don't you think you're going to get away with this!" He ran at her furiously, and Casey was unable to hold back a scream of terror when he pinned her to the floor, holding her down and hitting her on the face before he grabbed her flailing arms, stopping her from pounding on his shoulders and wrapped both her wrists in one strong hand and holding them above her head, hitting her again and again and again. She gave a shout of pain, struggling weakly underneath him, trying to hold her right leg still. She didn't want to try and kick him and end up in a wheelchair for the rest of her life. Her shallow, frantic breaths hurt her ribs, but she couldn't stop wheezing. It caused a horrid flashback, and as she fought terrors in both the present and the past, Casey screamed in the twin emotions of pain and fear, trying desperately to get away from him. She didn't have enough air to speak when he slapped her across the face again, causing a short gasp to escape her lips. She just wanted to be left alone. She didn't want to hurt Mark, she just wanted him to go away and stop hitting her.

But she kept fighting- she kept it up, struggling and fighting and kicking until there was a shout of panic and a scream that did not belong to her, and then there was someone hauling Mark off her, and that was it. All the senses of the past that had been reawakened during the fight came forth, and she did the same as when she was a kid, pulling her knees up to her chest and hiding her face with her hair, curling up into a tiny ball and trembling violently, on the alert for another attack.

"Mark Novak, you are under arrest for the rape and assault of Casey Novak, the assault of Linda Novak, and the kidnapping of Shelly Novak," Elliot snarled as he pulled the bastard from the warehouse, reading him his rights. Olivia looked around for Shelly and found the little girl trembling on the other side of the room, in a similar state as Casey. Content in the fact that Shelly could survive a couple more minutes without help, Olivia knelt cautiously in front of the ADA, well aware that she had just been beaten and would probably not respond well to physical touch.

"Casey," she said softly, moving a little closer to her. "Casey, it's okay. Mark's gone. You're all right."

Casey refused to look at her, clearly scared out of her mind. Olivia didn't know that she was battling more than one flashback, aside from the fact that she was just beaten half to death by her brother... _again_. The ADA shook her head quickly, shaking violently. "Casey," Olivia assured her again, "It's all right. It's just me, Olivia. Come on, Case, look up, you'll see it's just me."

Casey looked up slowly, eyes wide and scared, still trembling, and asked, "'Livia?"

Olivia nodded gently and smiled at her. "Yeah, sweetie." She held out her hand, offering it to Casey, waiting for Casey to meet her halfway, since she didn't want to touch Casey before she was ready to be touched.

The ADA slowly reached out and placed her hand in Olivia's, still shaking. The detective smiled at her and squeezed her hand. "See, Case? Just me, sweetheart, and I'm not going to hurt you."

Casey swallowed before holding onto Olivia tighter and saying, "Shelly." Blinking nervously, Casey stood up, using Olivia's shoulders as leverage, and limped ahead, using the wall for support, heading over to the young girl huddled up against the wall.

When Casey got near her, though, Shelly screamed and pulled away, hiding her face in her knees. "Stop it!" she shouted, curling up against the wall. "Get away from me!"

After a moment of confusion, Casey asked uncertainly, "Shelly? Shells, it's just me, baby. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise."

"You hurt Daddy!" Shelly shouted, then sobbed. "Don't touch me, please!" When Casey realized that Shelly was terrified of her, specifically, it took all of her strength not to break down into tears.

"Shelly," she tried again, her voice breaking, "Shelly, please... it's... it's only me. I had to hit your father, he was trying to hurt me."

Shelly shook her head again. "No! Mama said not to be friends with people who hit other people and you tried to hit Daddy!"

Now Casey was trying to justify it to herself, not just Shelly. "Shelly, I had to hit him, he was hitting me, I was just trying to get him away from me," she pleaded, tears shining in her eyes now. "Please. Please believe me, sweetie, I wasn't trying to hurt him. I just wanted him to leave me alone. That's all I wanted. Please. I'm so sorry."

But Shelly had been through too much to trust anyone but her mother right now. After the backup had come in to get Mark, Elliot had returned to find out what was taking so long, finding Olivia waiting several feet back from where Casey was pleading with Shelly to trust her.

Normally, Olivia would of known that it was best for her to take Shelly outside rather than Elliot- she doubted the poor child would be able to go with any man without screaming- but Casey wouldn't be entirely comfortable around a man, either, and Casey had been through so much... for once, Casey deserved for someone to pay attention to _her_needs for once, to take care of _her_ and comfort _her_. "Elliot," Olivia said softly, grabbing his hand, "Can you get Shelly out of here? I'll take care of Casey." He nodded at her and approached the young, terrified child slowly, stopping in his tracks when she screamed again.

"Hey, Shelly," he said softly, holding up his hands to show her he was unarmed. "I'm a police officer. I'm here to take you back to your mother, all right? I'm not going to hurt you."

Shelly looked up at him nervously, and Casey cried out softly at how she trusted an unfamiliar male more than her. "Wha- wha- what's your name?" Shelly asked shakily, her eyes doubting around the room nervously.

Elliot smiled at her and said softly, "My name's Elliot. You know, I have a daughter about your age."

"Do you- do you hurt her, too?" Shelly asked nervously, still scared.

Elliot shook his head. "No, I don't. I never once hit her. Do you want to see a picture?" Shelly nodded mutely, so Elliot reached into his wallet and pulled out a picture of Lizzie and handed it to her. "There you go. Her name's Lizzie. You can keep that, if you want."

Shelly nodded tremulously before crumpling up the picture in her hand and clutching it close to her chest. "I wanna see Mama," she pleaded.

"I know," Elliot told her softly. "I know. I can take you to her. She's waiting for you at the hospital for you- she really wants to see you, Shelly." The little girl hesitated, but when she caught sight of Casey, she curled up tighter and shook her head.

"Is Daddy gonna be there?"

"No, Shelly. I promise, he's not. Remember, I'm a police officer. I'm not going to let him hurt you."

Shelly shook her head nervously, still clearly terrified. "Is Aunt Casey gonna be there?" she asked slowly.

Casey looked up hopefully with teary eyes as Elliot asked cautiously, "Do you want her to be there?"

The young girl shook her head vigorously, closing her eyes tightly. "No. No, she hurt Daddy."

The ADA looked down and closed her eyes too, whimpering in pain that wasn't physical. "Okay. Okay, then. She won't be there." He would of glanced at Casey apologetically, but Shelly was watching him and he didn't want Shelly to see and stop trusting him as well. "Just let me take you out of here." Shelly hesitated, then slowly got to her feet but cried out in pain.

"Shelly!" Casey exclaimed immediately, trying to walk forward to help her but falling to her hands and knees, groaning in pain as well. Shelly immediately jumped back when she saw Casey, terrified once again.

Elliot moved closer to her and asked Shelly softly, "Shelly, I can't let you walk, your legs might be hurt. Will you let me carry you?"

Shelly hesitated before closing her eyes tightly and holding out her arms as a silent invitation for him to carry her. "It's okay, Shelly," he told her, and when Casey saw that Shelly was comfortable enough to let a strong, intimidating male figure such as Elliot carry her, but wasn't calm when Casey tried to talk to her, she broke down into tears.

Olivia got down on the floor next to Casey, her heart breaking as the ADA shook her head over and over, saying, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt him, I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay, Casey. You didn't do anything wrong," Olivia murmured in her ear, making sure Casey was all right with being touched before wrapping her arms around her and pulling her into a gentle hug. Casey sobbed, burying her head in Olivia's shoulder, unable to hold it in anymore. She couldn't force herself to focus on anyone else right now. She had been beaten almost every day for the past three months, violently raped, and just survived yet another beating to find that her niece, one of the people that she had endured pure hell for, was terrified of her. "You're safe, sweetheart," Olivia told her, kissing the side of her head. "It's okay. Shelly just doesn't understand, hun. I promise, you haven't done anything wrong and none of this is your fault."

Casey sobbed harder and painfully, leaning her head into the detective's neck, still trembling. Olivia rubbed Casey's back gently, unable to even make a guess at how broken Casey must be right now. It must have been an eternity since someone had comforted Casey after she'd been hit, and it was obvious that Casey was still in shock. "Shh..." Olivia murmured, kissing the side of her head softly and holding her tightly. "Shh. I'm right here, Casey. I'm not going to leave you."

_It__just__wasn't__fair,_ Olivia thought, _not__at__all_. Casey had been beaten by her own brother, day after day after day, to save that little girl from being hurt herself, and the fact that Shelly was now afraid of Casey, treating her as if _she_ was the abuser, must have hurt more than she thought possible. Casey clung to Olivia like a scared child, her eyes shut tight as tears streamed down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I didn't mean to be a bad girl. I'll behave, I promise. I'm so sorry."

"Shh," Olivia told her, kissing her forehead again. "Don't you dare apologize, Casey. You have done nothing wrong here, nothing at all. Shelly just doesn't understand, that's all, sweetie. I don't want to hear you say you're sorry again," she said harshly but lovingly. She met Casey's gaze and cupped her chin in her hand, forcing Casey to look up at her. She met Casey's frightened, teary gaze and said, "Casey Novak, you are not to blame for any of this. The only thing you have done these past three months is save that little girl from being hit by taking the blows yourself, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. Shelly is scared of you because she doesn't understand what's going on. She's only five, sweetheart. You haven't done anything wrong at all. I don't want you to apologize for anything at all... _I__'__m_ sorry. I'm sorry that I couldn't stop him from hurting you, that I didn't keep my promises about keeping you safe. But you're safe now, and you don't have to be scared anymore. He is never going to hurt you ever again... you're safe, sweetheart." Olivia kissed her forehead gently before taking Casey's hand and telling her, "Casey, we need to get you back to the hospital. You could of torn a stitch, or- I mean, your hip..."

Casey nodded tremulously, allowing Olivia to help her upright and pull the ADA's arm over her shoulder, letting her to limp to the exit. Every step was slow and painful, and Olivia watched her carefully, trying to make sure that Casey didn't need an ambulance.

Casey was still crying when Olivia led her to the car... the detective didn't blame her. She couldn't believe Shelly had reacted like that to Casey. Olivia couldn't blame the little girl after everything she had been through, but after everything Casey had done for her, it had to have broken the ADA's heart to see the child terrified of her. "You're going to be okay," Olivia told her softly as she helped her over to the police outside, who had already called an ambulance to help the cab driver. When one of the cops noticed them, he hurried over to help, but Casey whimpered involuntarily and pulled back, tucking her head against her chest and closing her eyes.

"Back off," she warned him quickly, tightening her hold on Casey. "I'm bringing her to the hospital. She's an ADA, and the victim." Olivia helped Casey into the passenger of the squad car- Elliot had taken Shelly to the hospital in an ambulance- and smiled softly at her. "Hang on, Case," she told her as she hurried around to start the engine. "You're going to be all right. We'll be at the hospital soon."

"Shelly?" Casey asked tearfully. "Is she going to be okay?" Her voice broke, and she looked down unhappily, blushing furiously.

It broke Olivia's heart that, after what Shelly had said to Casey, the ADA was still concerned about the little girl. "I'm not sure, Case. You've done everything you could protect her." Casey sighed and looked away, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning her head against the window.

"I'm sorry, Olivia," she said hollowly, staring off into the distance. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey," the detective told her, glancing over at her and holding her gaze for a moment. "What did I tell you about apologizing?" Casey glanced at her and sent her a small smile, sinking back into the seat.

Casey sighed before telling her, "Olivia, I... I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for me today. And after I've been such a bitch to you and Elliot... and I really didn't mean or any of this to happen, it's just- Shelly needed me... well, she _did,_ I guess. I don't know about now."

Olivia sighed, giving her a compassionate glance. "Shelly was scared, that's all. You just wait, Casey. She doesn't hate you, and before you know it, she'll trust you again."

SVUSVUSVU

"Shelly!" Linda exclaimed when Elliot led the young girl out of the ER. "Oh thank god!" She ran forward and embraced her daughter, kissing her forehead and holding her tightly.

Elliot allowed the small family to have their reunion for a moment before saying softly in Linda's ear, "We need to talk, ma'am."

Linda held onto Shelly for a moment longer before picking the little girl up and setting her on a chair in the corner. She knelt down in front of her daughter and put her hands down on her shoulders, telling her, "Shelly, I need to talk to that detective for a second, okay? I'll be right over there, and I'll come back to you in just a moment sweetheart, okay?" Shelly nodded, pulling her knees up to her chest and watching as Linda kissed her forehead again. "I love you, honey," she told her before walking a few steps in the opposite direction with Elliot.

"Shelly's going to be all right," Elliot told her softly. "Nothing's broken. Just a couple bruises- the doctor gave her some pain meds so it wouldn't hurt as much for a while. Mark is in custody and our ADA is writing up the paperwork to have him charged as soon as possible... but that's not what I want to say. I'm not sure if Shelly's going to come around on her own because she's so young, but I'm not sure if Casey will be able to handle it if Shelly doesn't... well, I suppose the best word is forgive her, but there's nothing to forgive."

Linda frowned in confusion, glancing back at Shelly before asking, "Detective, what exactly happened?"

Elliot hesitated before saying bluntly, "Basically, she was terrified of Casey and said that she didn't trust her- Shelly acted like Casey was going to hurt her like Mark had, and said it was because Casey hit Mark, when she was trying to get him the hell off her."

Linda eyes widened before she turned and stormed back to her daughter. "Shelly Maria Novak!" she exclaimed furiously. "Did you tell Aunt Casey that she was like your father?"

Shelly stared up at her in surprise before explaining, "She hit him. You said that people who hit other people were bad people."

Sighing, Linda shook her head, keeping her arms crossed tightly over her chest. "Shelly, Casey wasn't trying to hurt him. You fight back against him, too, and there's nothing wrong with you. And do you have any idea how much Casey has suffered for us? _She_ is the only reason that your father hasn't been hurting me or you. She has saved your life, over and over and over again. Do you have any idea how much you hurt her when you told her she was just like your father?"

"I'm sorry, Mama," Shelly mumbled, staring down at her hands. "I'm sorry, but I... I was actually scared of her. She hit him, and-"

"Shelly!" Linda exclaimed, getting down on her knees so she was on her daughter's eye level, "Your Aunt Casey is a good, amazing woman. She will never, _ever_ hurt you. And what you said to her really hurt her feelings. She risked her life for you... for both of us."

Shelly sighed sadly, staring at her hands. "I'm sorry, Mama," she said again. "I wasn't trying to be mean to Aunt Casey... I was just really scared, and... and I didn't want her to touch me after I saw what she was doing with Mark, and..."

"Shelly, listen to me very carefully. Casey was not doing anything with your father, he was doing things _to_her, terrible things that she shouldn't of had to suffer through. And you need to apologize to your Aunt Casey." Shelly looked at her for a second, trembling slightly before throwing her arms around her mother and burying her head in her mother's shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Mama," she sobbed again. "I'm so sorry." Linda sighed, wrapping her arms around her daughter and kissing her hair.

"It's not your fault, sweetie. You're going to be okay... I love you. You're going to be okay."

Please review


	11. Chapter 11

Thanks to LiveLoveLikeMe and karenina bubo for reviewing, and again, I'm very sorry for the mix-up last chapter.

**Chapter 11**

Casey rolled over in the uncomfortable hospital bed, wincing slightly and smiling at the two detectives in her room. She'd ripped out a couple of her stitches and fractured three of her ribs in two places, but there were no other new injuries. She was trapped in the hospital for four days, now, at _least_. Casey was not too happy about it, but the detectives were agreeing with the doctor, and it seemed as if they weren't going to let her be alone for a while.

Linda tentatively poked her head in the hospital room and smiled at the ADA. "Hey, Case," she said softly. "Shelly's here to see you. Can she come in?"

Casey looked up hopefully in surprise, nodding immediately as she pushed herself up onto her elbows. Linda moved aside and allowed the little girl to walk slowly inside.

The bruising had gone down a lot, but the darkness in her eyes hadn't totally disappeared. The young child looked as contrite and guilty as the boy who broke the neighbor's window with a baseball. "I think you have something to tell your Aunt Casey," Linda told her softly when Shelly remained silent, her face bright red in embarrassment.

"I'm... I'm sorry, Aunt Casey," she mumbled before clearing her throat and speaking louder. "I shouldn't have... I shouldn't have said you hurt Daddy. I didn't know that you were keeping Daddy away from me and Mama. I... I don't know what was going on, I was just scared, and- and Daddy-"

"Shh," Casey told her, shaking her head and smiling at her. "It's okay, honey," she said softly. "I don't blame you. I know you didn't mean it."

Shelly smiled hesitantly at her, raising her eyes to look at him. "I... but... really? You're not mad at me?'

Casey shook her head. "No, sweetie. I don't." She yawned, then, hiding it with her hand, but Linda saw and squeezed her daughter's shoulder.

"Hey, Shelly," she said softly, "Why don't we go home, let Casey get some rest. We can come back and visit her tomorrow."

Casey opened her mouth to protest, but the look both Linda and the detectives gave her shut her up. "All right..." Shelly trailed off, still sad. "You promise you're not mad at me?"

"Of course not, baby." Casey reached for her hand and squeezed it gently before allowing the young girl to leave.

After the door had closed on the Novaks, Olivia turned to Casey, smiling at her. "See? I told you Shelly wasn't really scared of you. She just needed some time to process what happened, that's all." The ADA just shrugged and played with the hospital ID bracelet around her wrist, fighting sleep and avoiding the detectives' gazes.

"Hey, Casey," Elliot told her, watching her carefully and smiling in amusement. "You do know that if you don't give in and let yourself get some sleep, Olivia and I will call the doctor in and have him sedate you?" Casey chuckled while Olivia nodded in agreement, and with all the drugs coursing through her system, it was so easy to believe that sleep could be a possibility... that she could sleep and nothing bad would happen.

Olivia smiled when she saw Casey's breathing even out and deepen, squeezing the now sleeping ADA's hand before glancing up at Elliot. "You think she's going to be okay?" she asked him. He just shrugged.

"I can't answer that question, Liv. You know Casey, she's tough as nails, but she also doesn't know how to ask for help when she needs it... and she wasn't just raped, she's been beaten half to death too many times to count."

"Sixty five," a voice said from the doorway. Elliot and Olivia looked up to see their Munch standing in the doorway, Fin behind him. "She was beaten sixty five times, _at__least_. That's how many different hospital visits she recorded."

Elliot sighed, shaking his head. "I still can't believe we didn't notice anything."

Munch repeated what he had told Fin earlier. "Casey didn't want us to notice, and she was pretty god damn good at hiding it... how's she doing? And not just on the physical front."

Elliot and Olivia glanced at the sleeping ADA for a moment before the female detective said, "Moody, I guess, and she's not been saying too much about what happened. I'm not sure how much of that was because of what Shelly told her, though- she only just went to sleep, right after Shelly came and apologized. Everything else, I'm sure you can guess for yourselves- not admitting to any pain, overworking herself as much as she can, considering she's in the hospital. I'm not sure if she's just processing everything internally, or if she's in denial."

They were all quiet for a moment before Munch finally said, "Tracey Kibre got Mark arraigned, and he's on remand- no bail. He wasn't too happy about it, obviously. Trial's set in three days."

Elliot and Olivia looked up at him in surprise. "Three days?" Olivia asked uncertainly. "That's pretty quick."

"Judges don't like abusive bastards who rape their sisters, especially when said sister is an Assistant District Attorney. Big shock, Trevor Langan's the defense attorney- he's always had it in for Casey." Olivia shook her head again, reaching over to stroke Casey's cold hand.

"Is she being called as a witness, or just Linda?" Elliot asked worriedly- he wasn't sure if Casey could handle being called to testify. Then again, before all of this, none of them would of thought Casey was strong enough to survive what she had these past three months. They knew she was tough, but- no one could be strong enough to survive that. Somehow, though, Casey had.

Munch shrugged helplessly. "Tracey has to call her- she's the only one who can testify to what exactly went on in that warehouse. Shelly would need a swearability hearing because she's the only five, and besides, Linda thinks she's too traumatized to go through it, and I'm inclined to agree with her. You know how vicious Langan can be with victims on the stand. Casey will be able to hold her own, but not Shelly. Besides, according to what Linda said, she's the only one who can testify to what Mark did and said when he beat and raped her."

Silence reigned for a moment, everybody watching Casey uncertainly, wondering what had given her the strength to endure the torture for three long months. Finally, Munch said, "El, Liv, IAB wants to talk to you because of how Casey disappeared and Shelly was kidnapped. Cragen's kept them off your ass so far, but they're not going to forget about this- might as well talk to them sooner rather than later."

Fin saw Olivia glance protectively at the ADA, uncertain, and said, "We'll stay with Casey, make sure she doesn't break out of the hospital _again_."

Chuckling softly, Elliot and Olivia agreed and got up to leave. Fin and Munch claimed the visitors' chairs while Casey shifted in her medicated sleep, unaware of what was going on around her, only what images of the past her mind had put up for her to relive, unwilling to let her rest fully, even now that everything was over.

_Little fourteen year old Casey laughed as she typed away on her computer. Well, perhaps little was the wrong word- the home that she and her brother lived in quickly stole the innocence of any child, but they were both getting by. Surviving- and they were happy. "Hey, Casey," Mark told her, coming to sit down next to her. "I'm going rock climbing after dinner. You want to come?"_

_Casey sighed, shaking her head at the mention of her older brother's favorite pastime, something she enjoyed doing as well.. "Mark, come on, you know I have to study for my chemistry test. The SATs are coming up and I'm not even in high school yet, I have to study!"_

_"Come on," he tempted again, taking the thick college text from her hands. "Casey, come on. I know you're only taking those tests so you can get into college sooner- and, more importantly, get out of the house… Hey, I'll tell you what, I'll look over the chapter you're working on, tell you what you need to know for the test. And we could be back in plenty of time for you to study, anyways."_

_Once again, she shook her head and exclaimed, "Mark, you have never taken the Chemistry SAT! You don't know what's on it! ...Look, I'm sorry, I do want to go climbing, but… want is the wrong word. I can't. Sorry." When Mark continued to try and convince her, she got tired of it and stood up, walking over to the kitchen. "Mark," she said playfully, "Should I just go practice piano and continue this discussion? Because my answer will still be the same." _

_Out of nowhere, Casey found herself on the floor, Mark on top of her, pinning both her small wrists in one of his huge, strong hands. But he wasn't playing- he wasn't smiling, he wasn't laughing, he was furious. Gasping in panic, Casey tried to escape, but her petite body struggling against his muscular one was about as effective as someone trying to lift the Empire State Building with their pinky. He was over half a foot taller than her, 21, and could do a pull-up with only two fingers. She was a fourteen year old girl._

_Casey tried to worm her way out of his grasp, but he was too strong. She wanted to scream, wanted to scream so loud the neighbors heard and called the cops, but she didn't have the air to do anything but wheeze, trying desperately to fill her lungs with much-needed oxygen, but he was squeezing her chest so tight she couldn't. He flipped her over onto her stomach and good god, it hurt, and now he was on her back, still pinning her hands. Her legs couldn't reach him and she still can't breathe. "Stop fighting!" he snarled at her, gripping her wrists even tighter. "You won't win against me! Stop fighting!"_

_There are two points of view at once in Casey's head right then- one was saying, 'Wow, if he keeps squeezing you any tighter, he could break some ribs,', but the other was fighting on instinct alone, trying to get away from attacker but finding it impossible. She was just a little girl, a dust speck caught in the winds of fate, unable to stop death from rearing up on its heels ad claiming her life. _

_He forced her body to contort into many painful positions that she had absolutely no control over, but then, when she was on her chest again, she saw the bowl up against the wall and her animalistic instincts reached out to grab the suddenly gleaming opportunity. Casey grabbed the bowl and slammed it against him three times in a row. The plastic cracked in half twice, rendering her weapon unusable, but it didn't matter- he flipped her again, forcing her to her knees, and gripping her wrist, jacking her arm behind her back. The logical part of her mind recognized it as the way to dislocate someone's shoulder as he forced it higher, but her arm caught fire and a shout erupted from her throat, robbing her of her the oxygen that was quickly becoming harder and harder to get._

_"Stop!" the man called from the couch, but in Casey's dream, he was faceless and had no name, no identity. "That's enough." _

_Neither child knew which the man was reprimanding, but Mark wasn't stopping, and Casey found herself trying to quiet down, stop attracting his attention, stop bothering him as she was flipped onto her chest again, Mark's knee digging into her back. The logical part was shouting, now- 'I don't want to be reprimanded, I want your help!' Didn't matter, though, she didn't have the air to talk. And the logical part continued to work, independent of her instincts, and realized she was wheezing, and that was wrong. She tried to control her breathing but couldn't; she couldn't take any deeper breaths, he was on top of her, so heavy and strong her chest couldn't expand enough to breathe, and the physical stress on her body wasn't helping. But that was all her logic talking, her instincts were still fighting._

_She realized, then, with his current position , she could kick him- and did. She brought her leg back, smashing her heel into his back over and over, and it must have hurt him, because he suddenly forced her to her knees again, gripping her arms tightly, and her instincts and logic collided. Her instincts told her, slam your head up into his jaw, do it now, it could help, do it now! But her logic was shouting at her, warning her- it'll cause a concussion, you won't remember anything, don't don't don't! But it didn't matter, she was fighting for her life, and she did it, slamming her head up into his jaw once, and it doesn't hurt, there's no pain, and she does it again, and the man on the couch speaks up again and Mark flips her once more, and her fight continues._

_As the sun sets, both on the outside world and on her life, Mark abruptly lets her go, backing up while Casey, shaking violently, too shocked to believe what was happening but her instincts still alert crawled closer to the dying light, away from Mark, wrapping her arms around her knees, hiding her face with her hair, wheezing past clenched teeth. _

_"See? You couldn't get away," Mark said triumphantly, having not even broken in a sweat in Casey's frantic battle for life. "And look, you're breathing so hard because you're scared."_

_'No, you idiot,' her instincts shouted, 'I'm breathing like this because you just nearly beat me to death!' But her logic told her no, don't speak up, because she didn't have the air and didn't want to provoke him again, anyway. _

_He continues to lecture her, but her blurred dream skips over to the end of their one-sided conversation, when he says, "You know, I bet if I tried to touch you right now, you wouldn't let me."_

_When he gets up and begins to walk over to her, her instincts scream two things at once- to run for her life, and to smile- because she and Mark had played many games similar to this when they were young, and she was trying to deny what had just happened, already, because it couldn't have happened, her brother couldn't have hurt this badly. She danced and spun away from him as quickly as she could, ducking under his ravenous grip and running to her room. Mark hovered in the doorway, telling her, "Casey, when you're ready to come to dinner, tell us. If you're not going to come, tell us so we can go." _

_Shaking slightly and feeling the tightness in her chest, the tickle in her throat from lack of oxygen, Casey slowly pulled off her gym shorts and put on a pair of jeans, every sound from the other room making her react like a chorus of gunshots had just been fired off. Her nerves raw and her heart pounding, she glanced at her piano, knowing what she had to do to calm down. She walked over and began playing Kiss the Rain. The soft, sweet melodies arcing over the lower bass line, carrying her forward, gave her what she wanted- a welcome distraction, and a calming one. Her fingers danced quickly over the keys, and, for once, when she reached the key change, she welcomed the change instead of cringing when the chords reached her ears, realizing the tender sweetness of the softer, slower melodies- because some change had to be a good thing, right? She drifted to the end notes, her fingers slowing, having stopped shaking long ago, and ended it. After holding onto the notes for a moment, she felt for her pulse in her left wrist, then smiled slightly. Mission accomplished- she'd calmed herself down._

_"Casey!" A distant voice called, and she felt someone's hand on her shoulder. She shook him off, groaning at whoever it was, too tired, too sluggish to fight him off. "Casey, honey," the voice called him. "You okay?"_

_I don't know!_

_"Are you okay, Casey?"_

_I don't know!_

_"CASEY!" _

Casey opened her eyes to see Munch shaking her by the shoulders, his expression worried. "Case?" he called again, watching her carefully. "You okay?" he repeated.

She took a deep breath, nodding shakily. "Yeah," she said after a moment. "Yeah, I'm okay." Munch let go of her and let her have her space, still watching to make sure she was okay. Sighing softly, Casey looked around the room, self-consciously pulling the blanket over herself, trying to maintain a shred of dignity.

"It sounded like you were having a nightmare, so my partner tried to wake you up," Fin said as an explanation.

Blushing slightly, Casey smiled in thanks and pushed herself up onto her elbows, sitting up straighter despite the shockwave of pain it caused. When her head spun and she felt more than slightly dizzy, she leaned her head back against the pillows, blinking rapidly so she could see. "Why are you guys here?" she asked curiously, looking in between the two detectives. "You do know that I'm a big girl, I'm old enough to be left home alone, right? I'm not going to throw a party or burn down the house."

Fin and Munch both laughed without real humor, though they were both contented in the fact that she hadn't shut down completely; that the Casey they all knew and loved was still in there. "Case," Fin started, "El and Liv are down at the station, being worked at by IAB, because of Shelly's kidnapping. Don't worry, nothing's going to come of it, the rat squad is just sticking their noses in where they don't belong, as usual."

Casey frowned guiltily, trying to convince herself that nothing was going to happen to Elliot and Olivia before she cleared her throat and said, "Trial... trial's in three days. I have to get out before then. I've got to be there for Linda and Shelly; I'm not going to-"

"Casey," Munch interrupted sharply, trying to get her to look at him, "you have been there for those two every single day for the past three months. It's time that you take care of yourself."

"Come on," she tried again, "the doctor said four days, can't I just leave a day early? I have to be there for the trial."

Fin and Munch just sighed, knowing that nothing they said would convince her. Casey was stubborn, hard-headed, and driven to protect others and strive for justice, regardless of the cost to herself. Finally, Fin said, "Case, baby, we can talk to the doctors for you, but if you rip out a single stitch, you know Liv's gonna hog tie you and bring you right back here, right?"

Casey chuckled, nodding. "Yeah. Yeah, that's our Liv... thanks, you guys, I appreciate this. You know, the fact that you're here with me when you've got a hell of a lot of better things to do."

"You know, Casey, you're not as alone in this as you think. I'm not going to pretend that anyone understands what's been going on these past three months, but that doesn't mean we're just going to hang you out to dry. If you need anything, all you have to do is ask."

The ADA sighed and crossed her arms, looking away. She was this close to telling her secret. _This_ close. But not yet; fear of being rejected, hated, the inevitable change of people treating her like a weak, pathetic victim... she wasn't going to open her mouth. Everything would be better if she just kept her silence.

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	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Elliot glared at the pathetic excuse for a human being sitting in the interrogation room- Mark Novak. "Why the hell is that bastard back here?" he asked Cragen. "I thought he was in jail until the trial!"

Cragen shook his head sourly, crossing his arms. "Turns out, our friend Mark has friends who 'by mistake' got him transferred back here. The poor sap who was here when Mark showed up didn't know who he was and put him in interrogation."

"How soon before we can send his ass back to Rikers?" Elliot asked, clenching his hands into fists, still glaring at Mark.

"Langan's making a fuss about it, I don't know why. And, unfortunately for us, Mark's friends are smarter than expected, or he's just lucky as hell- while he was sitting in this cozy interrogation room, that drug case that's been on the news for the past three weeks was finally convicted. Twenty seven defendants, all on their way to Rikers- now there's no room for Mark over there anymore. Since he hasn't even been brought to trial yet, we're going to have to keep him at the precinct."

Shaking his head, Elliot turned away, then turned his head to glare at Mark again. "Casey doesn't know, right? She doesn't need to know about this."

Cragen nodded. "I know. We're keeping this as quiet as possible... he's been asking to see Casey, Elliot. That's all he'll talk about. Not Shelly, not Linda, but Casey."

Elliot's eyes widened and he looked up at Cragen nervously. "You're not going to..."

"No, of course not. But if Casey finds out and wants to talk to him, I'm not going to stop her. She's a grown woman and can make her own choices... we'd do the same for any other victim," he finished with a shrug.

"Yeah, but, Captain, Casey's not just any other victim. This is personal," he said firmly- there was no chance that meeting with Casey would be anything but traumatizing for the poor girl who'd already been traumatized enough.

Neither said anything for a moment, but the silence was interrupted when Olivia hurried into the observation room, her worry clear on her face. "Captain, you need to see this," she said, beckoning him out into the squad room.

Sharing a confused glance with Elliot, Cragen hurried out after Olivia, Elliot coming up from behind. In the middle of the squad room and currently throwing a fit was a man about Cragen's age, with dark hair that was almost black, glasses, and a furious expression close to rivaling Elliot's. "Are you the guy in charge around here?" he snapped at Cragen, who raised an eyebrow at him before nodding.

"Yes, I'm Captain Cragen- who are you, and-"

"I'm here to see my son!" the man shouted at him. "My son calls me from _jail_ and says he's here on charges of _raping_ his _sister_- I want Mark and Casey in the same room with me, _right__now!_"

Cragen took a moment to control his emotions before he said, "Sir, Mark is not leaving this precinct, and Casey is currently in the hospital. And if you want them in the same room, you're only going to get that with Casey's okay."

The man's face grew red, and he started shouting even louder than before. "Casey is _my_ daughter, I do not need _her_ okay if I want her somewhere, and right now, I want her here!"

The detectives looked at each other in surprise that the man didn't even care that his own daughter was in the hospital before Cragen said authoritatively, "Casey is a grown woman and you have no right to order her here!"

Mark's father curled his hands into fists and snarled at him, "I want her here in 24 hours, or there is going to be hell to pay." It was clearly supposed to be intimidating, but no one in the room found it to be so.

Cragen moved forward and said coldly, "If you threaten Casey, you're never going to see her here, whether she says yes or not. And if you're trying to threaten me, I wouldn't advise it."

"Why don't you say that without your posse to back you up?" he shouted back, gesturing to Cragen's detectives, who had all gathered around the fight, glowering at Mark's father.

Cragen just shook his head. "You want to make a threat like that against me in a room full of cops? You'd be on the ground before you even raised a finger. Get the hell out of here before I have you arrested," Cragen ordered, pointing to the door.

The man hesitated before growling, "This is not over!" Then he turned on his heel and stormed from the room, slamming the door on his way.

After a moment of silence, Cragen turned to Elliot and Olivia, gesturing for them to get moving. "Calling Fin at the hospital and warning him, I'm on it," Elliot said, sitting down at his desk and picking up his phone.

"Name's David Novak," Olivia told Cragen, nodding in the direction of the interrogation room. "From what I could gather, he wants to talk to Casey and Mark together because he thinks he can convince Casey to drop the charges. Fat chance of that happening."

SVUSVUSVU

"He _what?_" Fin exclaimed into the phone, even as Munch and Casey stared at him in confusion. "...Wait, you want me to ask her to... you can't possibly think- fine. I'll ask her. But you know that she's still- right. That's her, all right." Shaking his head, Fin hung up, handing the phone back to Casey so she could put it back on the wall cradle.

"What's going on, Fin?" Casey asked, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. "That phone call was about me, wasn't it?"

Fin sighed, then nodded. "Yeah. Case, please don't freak out, but... your father's down at the precinct. He wants to talk to you and Mark together, pronto. Cragen's given the okay, as long as you agree."

Casey's expression went from concern to horror. "David?" she exclaimed furiously, her hands clenched into fists. "_David__'__s__here?_ God damn it! I wondered how Mark could afford a defense attorney like Trevor Langan- well, there's my answer. Perfect Daddy to his only son; would buy China if Mark asked for it... does David know I'm here?" she asked softly, looking back at Fin nervously.

Fin nodded. "Yeah, Cragen told him about an hour ago- he said that your father didn't seem to care too much, though." Hurt bloomed across her face for a moment before it disappeared- not like she had expected anything different.

Taking in a shaky breath, Casey nodded, forcing herself to focus. "All right. All right, um, I have to get down there. I've got to meet with them."

Munch and Fin exchanged concerned glances before Fin said, "Casey, I'm not sure that's a good idea-"

"I don't give a shit whether it's a good idea or not, Fin! My job is not done until Mark is in jail, and I'm pretty god damn tired of lying to David's face when I- I just have to get down there. I'm leaving the hospital tonight, Fin. Trial is-"

"No, Casey!" Munch cut in. "You know what the doctor said! You have to-"

Sighing again, Casey shook her head vehemently and interrupted the beginning of Munch's tirade to 'take care of herself' and to 'not push herself'. "It's not like I'm going to go off all half-cocked and tear a stitch when I try to kick David's ass. And you all know Olivia will be watching over me so god damn much that if I even get a paper cut she'll try to bring me back to the hospital. And, no offense, but this is not any of your business! This is my problem. Mine and mine alone."

"Casey, what is wrong with you?" Munch demanded, glaring at her. "You're our friend; someone hurting you _is_ our problem! Despite what you think, Casey, this is more than just another case to us."

The ADA sighed. "I'm sorry. I really am… But, I'm still checking out of the hospital. I'll leave AMA if I have to, but I have to be there when David and Mark meet up."

The two detectives clearly did not agree with her decision, but they had to accept the fact that they still did not know the extent of her personal demons. There had to be a reason she was reacting this way to David's involvement, a reason that they did not yet understand, but none of them trusted Casey's immediate family- looking at the way Mark had turned out, David couldn't be much of a father. Casey must have raised herself to turned out to be such an amazing woman.

Finally, Fin said, "All right. But compromise for us, Casey- stay here for the night, and leave tomorrow morning."

Casey opened her mouth to protest, but Munch interjected quickly. "Casey," he said, giving her a look that clearly said not to push it.

She sighed, leaning her head back against the pillows and rolling her eyes. "God, you two are as bad as Olivia."

Munch and Fin laughed and nodded. "Yep," Munch said, leaning back against his chair. "Guilty as charged."

SVUSVUSVU

Olivia walked next to Casey, watching her carefully to make sure she wasn't going to fall. She was still hopped up on painkillers, but the doctor's choice of drug made her more sluggish than high. The ADA moved slowly towards the exit with her crutches, her face red with embarrassment. "Are you absolutely sure you want to do this, Casey?" Olivia asked her for what had to be the thousandth time that morning.

She nodded, turning her head to pierce Olivia with a verdant gaze. "Yes, Olivia. I have to. My job is not done until Mark is in prison." She repeated her words from last night, ignoring the voice screaming at her to tell Olivia the truth. She couldn't say anything about the past until after Mark was convicted. Then... well, she'd cross that bridge when she got to it.

The detective just sighed unhappily and shook her head again. She didn't agree with Casey's decision, not at all- the ADA needed to be taken care of now, and from what little she had seen of Casey's father, he wasn't her first choice. She seriously doubted that this meeting would bring her anything but pain... but she had to accept that she still didn't know everything about Casey's history with her family. Perhaps meeting with her father and brother could help her.

Shaking her head at how ridiculous the idea sounded in her head, with the pictures of Mark and David she had already compiled. Still, she was going to have to trust Casey. She could only hope that nothing went wrong.

Casey got slowly and painfully into the passenger seat of the squad car, moving awkwardly with her crutches. It reminded her of the similar experience she'd had with Casey after her broken hip... but things were different this time. Now that she knew what Casey had been through these past three months, it made her wonder how many times Casey had walked out of the hospital on crutches or in a cast... alone. Without any of her friends there to help her when she walked right back into pure hell once again.

She sighed, turning the key and driving slowly from the parking lot, trying not to make any sharp turns or sudden stops for the sake of Casey's ribs. The ADA closed her eyes tightly, trying to battle the dizziness and the blur. "Damn concussion," she muttered under her breath, taking deep, slow breaths.

"You all right?" Olivia asked softly in concern.

Casey took another deep breath before nodding slightly, carefully, and opening her eyes. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay," she said, keeping her voice quiet, not wanting to provoke a headache.

"I told you it was a bad idea for you to leave the hospital this soon," Olivia told her, smiling softly at the ADA.

Casey rolled her eyes but smiled back. She could trust Olivia... but she had to keep her silence until after the trial. Then she could tell her. Then, but only then.

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	13. Chapter 13

Thanks to LiveLoveLikeMe for reviewing… Casey's big secret, in this chapter! Finally.

**Chapter 13**

Everyone watched Casey carefully as she made her way into the squad room, following Olivia towards the interrogation room. Olivia moved aside when they got to the door and nodded at her while Cragen walked forward. "Casey, are you sure you want to do this?"

Casey was getting rather annoyed with everyone asking her that. Suppressing a groan, she nodded and said, "Yes, Don, I'm sure."

He sighed but stepped aside, allowing her to enter. "We'll be in observation, Casey, so if anything goes wrong..."

Sighing in aggravation, Casey nodded and said, "Thank you, Don, but I can handle David, and Mark will be handcuffed to the table." Before they could say anything else, she had stepped into the interrogation room and shut the door.

As the detectives filed into observation, Casey nodded at Mark before looking back at her father. "Hello, David."

"Casey. ...You look so grown up."

Casey nodded, her gaze never wavering from his cold eyes. " Yes. That's what happens when you haven't seen someone in eleven years."

"I'm not sure how that's my fault. You're the one who always said you were too busy to come down and visit us in the south."

Sighing and shaking her head, Casey swung forward and sat slowly down on the edge of the table. "We're not here to discuss this, are we, David?"

David crossed his thick arms before shaking his head as well. "You're right, we're not... I got a call from Mark two days ago; I caught the soonest flight up to New York. What the hell is going on here?"

Mark started talking first, making Casey smile slightly- it was like two small children bickering over what really happened during a fight, trying to get out of punishment to their parents. "Casey is pressing charges for rape and assault against _me_, for god's sakes! I didn't do anything wrong; she's my little sister, how is anything I do to her a crime!"

David just groaned and glared at Casey. "You had to have provoked your brother, he never would of done something like this otherwise. This has to be your fault somehow!"

"_My_ fault?" she shouted. "David, you _bastard!_"

"Hey! Don't you dare speak to your father that way, Casey!" David exclaimed.

That was it. She couldn't hold in the truth any longer. "For god's sakes, David!" she shouted back. "I am not your daughter anymore! I haven't seen you in eleven years and even before then, I wasn't your daughter! And I am _not_ responsible for Mark's actions! And hell yes I provoked him! It was the only way to keep Linda and Shelly safe!"

"My daughter and my wife _are_ safe!" Mark screamed, straining against the handcuffs. "You are the only one-"

"_No!_ Mark, you beat Linda and Shelly! _You__hurt__them!_ You held a gun to your daughter's head! Do you have any idea how scared she was, how badly you traumatized her?"

David cut in, standing protectively near his son as he exclaimed, "Casey, you stay out of this! Mark has been depressed these past couple months; don't go after him for making any small mistakes!"

Casey didn't fight the raging emotions inside her any more. It hurt too much, put too much strain on her body which was already stressed to the breaking point. "_No!_" She screamed again, slamming her hand down on the table and getting to her feet, not even using her crutches, instead standing on one leg. "_No!_ I have had _enough_ of this shit!" She whirled on David, her furious gaze enough to make him back up a few steps. "_David!_ You want to know why you're not my father? Mark nearly beat me to death while you sat on your lazy ass and did _nothing!_ You didn't even raise one finger to stop him from hitting me! And your bullshit excuse- yeah, I was afraid I wouldn't be strong enough to help- _well__that__is__just__a__load__of__crap!_ You didn't even _try_ to help! You just sat there, calmly watching- you didn't even get riled up enough to even stand up! I have permanent nerve damage from what he did to me! I couldn't _breathe_, and when I screamed, what did you do? You told me to shut up! And then, that next year, what happened, David, huh? You think I don't remember him coming into my room at night? _You__think__I__don__'__t__remember?_"

David's face was beet red in anger when he advanced on her, shouting, "_That__'__s__enough,__Casey!_"

"_Ha!_ That's what you said to me when I was being beaten to death! Well, I survived and lived to tell the tale, you bastard. You don't 'that's enough' me, David. I was fourteen. A little girl, and I was dying. You could of saved me, but did you? No. And that next year, when I was fifteen? He molested me, David. You were there and did nothing. He raped me at night and you did nothing. You gave your son all your money for whatever the hell he wanted, made up excuses for him- but you let me get beaten and raped, you told me I would be an alcoholic, a horrible mother, that no one would ever stay with my lame ass. I spent years wondering what the hell I did to make you hate me so much, but I had to realize that I'm only responsible for my actions, not yours or Mark's. And speaking of Mark, you need to quit making excuses for your son. He's responsible for what he's done. _Not__me_. I'm going to end the legacy of Novaks being abusive- even though my genes are made up of monsters like you and Mark, I can still be a good mother, no matter _what_you say! Your son is going down for rape, assault, and kidnapping. He's never going to see Linda, Shelly, or me again. And its your fault I was molested, it's your fault he hit me, because you didn't stop it. How dare you say it was mine. He's abused me again, but I kept two innocent victims safe- what you never did for me. I've more than atoned for your sins, David. But you, you're never going to admit you've done anything wrong."

David took another threatening step forward, but Casey wasn't intimidated. "You think you scare me, David? You've threatened me with physical violence before, but your ex wife slapped me harder than you ever did. Get the hell out of my life. I never want to see either one of you again." Casey turned to address Mark, but that was when she caught sight of the window to observation... oh, god. The detectives were in there. They had heard every single word she'd said. They knew.

Grabbing her crutches and sending one more harsh glare at David and Mark, she left the interrogation room, fighting tears- not at the secret, but that now the detectives knew. She wanted to be alone. Not with Linda and Shelly. She wanted to be _alone_.

She limped over to the crib, sitting down on one of the bunks, hiding her face in her hands. She rested her sore leg on the bunk and sat up against the metal frame of the bed, shaking her head back and forth. This wasn't the way things were supposed to go. No one was supposed to ever know about this. This was her worst, deepest secret- like hell her friends would want anything to do with her now. And what kind of sex crimes prosecutor would she make? 'Your Honor, the prosecutor is biased- she can't prosecute my client because she was raped herself.' And the DA wouldn't want an incest victim on his payroll- bad publicity. Her job as ADA was probably gone. No one would want to associate with someone as dirty as her.

She sobbed lightly into her hands, starting to tremble. She didn't hear the door open, but did feel a strong yet gentle hand coming to rest on her shoulder. She jumped, moving her hands from her face and twisting to look behind her. It was Elliot.

"Hey," he said softly, sitting down next to her, making sure he was far enough away not to frighten her. Casey noticed this, and it only made her feel worse. She wiped furiously at the tears, embarrassed and ashamed, avoiding Elliot's gaze. "You know, you have every right to cry right now," he told her, moving his hand on top of hers. "You don't have to hide it."

Shaking her head, she continued to wipe at her tears and forced out, "What do you want, Elliot?" Her voice was a hoarse whisper, and each shaky, heavy breath, made her ribs ache. She took several deep breaths, trying to make the black spots disappear from her vision.

"I'm here to make sure you're okay," he told her, still maintaining his distance.

"What, you draw the short straw or something?" He smiled slightly, but there wasn't anything funny about this situation.

Elliot resumed stroking the back of her hand with his thumb while he asked, "Casey, why were you so afraid to tell us?"

She sighed, not even trying to hide her despair. "I'm not stupid, Elliot. People don't want to associate with incest victims. You all are going to try to hide it, but you don't have to. Sure, we'll be 'friends' for a while, but it'll eventually just get too awkward, and you'll leave. I'm expecting it; it's okay. I won't be able to prosecute sex crimes; the defense will just claim bias. Well, they would, but I'm not going to be an ADA for much longer. Once Branch hears about this, I'll be looking for work- it'd look bad for the presses, you know, a victim of molestation on his payroll."

Elliot stared at her in complete shock for a moment before he said passionately, "Casey, I'm not your boss, but I can guarantee you that you'll never be fired just because you were raped. It wasn't your fault, you didn't ask for it, and anyone who says so is an idiot. And it won't cost you your position in sex crimes, either. You're a damn good lawyer and you get justice for the victims. The only way you'll get transferred is if you ask to work in another department, which might be a good idea, considering the circumstances. But you've prosecuted sex crimes this past year and you are still passionate about the work we do, about getting justice for the victims. Not everybody can do this job, Casey, and you're good at it. And we would _never_ want to stop being your friend just because of what your brother did to you. Come on, Case. We work with rape victims everyday. How could you think we would do something like that?"

Casey winced at the hurt in his voice, staring down at her knees. "I... but aren't you guys mad at me for not telling you?"

Elliot shook his head immediately. "No. No, we're not, Casey. We all wished you had trusted us with this before, but we understand why you didn't and we're not going to hold it against you. You're a victim, Casey, not a perp. We love you like our little sister, Casey, and we're not going to stop being your friend because of something completely out of your control."

The ADA swallowed, still too embarrassed to look Elliot in the eye. "Elliot, I... I know that, these past three months, I've been horrible to all of you. On good days, I was a bitch, on bad days, I was probably insufferable- and you were all were kinder to me than I had any right to expect... I know it didn't seem like it, but I was depending on all of you to keep sane. Every time I left the precinct, I felt guilty but the fact that you all were still my friends was what kept me from giving up completely. I just wanted to say thanks for that."

"You don't have to thank us," he said, gently wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "We're friends. You don't have to thank us for being there for you... I'm just sorry we didn't help you sooner."

Casey shrugged weakly and smiled at him, finally meeting his eyes. "There was no way you could of known. And besides, everything turned out for the best, right? Shelly gets to grow up without Mark there to hurt her and Linda's safe. She'll have a tough time, without a father, but look at Olivia. Her father was a rapist, just like Shelly's, and her mother was even abusive, too- and look how amazing she turned out."

Elliot nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Shelly's a good kid, she'll be all right. What about you, Casey?"

She sighed, thinking back to when she was a child. "I... I'm not going to lie to you, Elliot. When I was a kid, after I was assaulted, I made a lot of mistakes. I couldn't even accept it had changed me for three months... I started hurting myself, and... point is, I got in pretty deep. I'm going to try to not make those mistakes again. I'll make no promises, but... it'll just take time. I'll be all right, though."

He nodded, trying not to picture Casey as a child, suffering through all her family had put her through. "Good. If you need anything- ask, all right?" Casey nodded and gave him a tiny smile. Then he decided to ask something that had been bothering him. "Case... if it's not too personal of a question- you mentioned permanent damage, when you were talking to Mark and David."

Casey didn't need to hear him say anything anymore. "Yeah, uh... permanent memory loss- I can't remember the entire assault. But... that wasn't what I was talking about... here, put your ear next to my jaw," she said, sitting up straighter and putting a hand on Elliot's head, guiding him closer.

"Like this?" he asked in confusion, wondering what this could have to do with his question.

"Yeah," Casey said softly. "Now, listen." A moment later, he heard a loud popping sound, like someone cracking their knuckles- but it came from Casey's jaw.

"Woah!" he exclaimed, pulling away in shock to see Casey rubbing the side of her face and gazing at him sadly. "What- was that your-"

She nodded in answer to his question. "Yeah, that was my jaw... it's called TMJ- temporomandidular joint disorder. It's why my smile is a little crooked and why I can pop my jaw and make that sound. I try to avoid doing it, but there's no real cure for it. It doesn't cause any serious pain or anything- just a constant reminder." 

Elliot sighed, wrapping his arm tighter around her shoulders. She had been through far too much and it really wasn't fair. "I'm sorry, Casey."

"For what?" she asked flatly. "You haven't done anything wrong."

"Neither have you," he said sharply, trying to make her understand. "You have risked your life for people when you had no obligation to do so."

Casey chuckled softly, shaking her head. "That's what you cops do, every day. Not so different from what you do."

Elliot smiled slightly. "Casey, what you'd did was pretty different. I don't know any cops who've been beaten every day for months, just to keep two civilians safe... I'm so sorry that we weren't there to help you. That we didn't take any of the signs seriously. But... it's over, Casey. Mark's going to prison. He won't be able to hurt you or Shelly or anybody else ever again."

Casey just sighed sadly. "I'll believe it when I see it."

Please review


	14. Chapter 14

Thanks to Anonymous for reviewing.

**Chapter 14**

Casey sighed sadly, staring at her watch. She was supposed to testify soon. Linda would be in there, as would all the detectives. She had wanted to ask them not to come, but knew it would be worthless. Besides, they would want to know why she didn't want them there, and when she told them that she didn't want them to see her like that, to see her so weak, they would all say she wasn't weak, that it wasn't her fault, _blah,__blah,__blah_.

Linda had known that Shelly would be hurt more than helped by seeing the trial, so Kathy Stabler was babysitting. In the days before the trial, whenever Linda had brought Shelly over to see Casey at her apartment, either Elliot or Olivia or, occasionally, both detectives were there, watching over her. Kathy had been there too once, and Shelly was practically in love with Elliot- the bond that had been created at the warehouse seemed unbreakable. When Kathy had introduced herself as Elliot's friend, Shelly had been slightly less nervous, but by the end of the day she had liked 'Ms. Kathy' as much as Elliot.

Casey took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. This was it. This was the last thing she had to do, and her duty would be done. Finally. All the pain and the humiliation and the shame would be over with. Just like Elliot had told her- everything would be over.

The bailiff exited the courtroom and caught her gaze, waving her inside. He recognized her from the many times she had prosecuted a case in that courtroom. Casey swallowed back her nerves and got to her feet with the aid of her crutches and swung forward, keeping her gaze focused forward, not wanting to see the detectives or Linda watching her. She didn't want their sympathy, because that would make this harder.

It felt strange to be sworn in. She had watched hundreds of people being sworn in over the years, and now she was, too. Casey idly wondered if this was how Alex Cabot had felt, when she had testified against Liam Conners. She sat behind the witness stand, keeping her eyes focused on Tracey without allowing herself to look at Mark. "Ms. Novak, please explain what happened the night of August 3rd."

Right to the heart of the matter, just like she and Tracey had rehearsed. "I was home- Mark Novak's house- and was in my room. About ten pm, I heard Linda- Mark's wife- screaming from their room. As Linda and I had previously agreed, I got up and went as fast as I could. I interceded, got Mark off her, but he started beating me instead. I fought back, which made him angrier. Eventually, he got mad enough to..." Here, she swallowed, purposely leaving out graphic details- Linda was in here, she didn't need to hear that, and the detectives- god, no. The shame would kill her. "He ripped my pants off. He was strong enough to... to hold me down while he took his own pants off and then he ra..." This was it. Once she said it, it would be real, out in the open, forever on the court records for everyone to see. "He raped me. Then he continued to hit me until he finally backed up and left me alone. I didn't know so at the time, but I had a broken hip, so I couldn't walk. I... I crawled downstairs and hid in the corner. After Mark had left for work, I called Linda and had her come back, to take me to the hospital."

"So, to reiterate, your brother was beating his wife, you tried to help, and he ended up raping you."

Casey knew why Tracey had said it, but it still hurt. "Yes," she said clearly, keeping her eyes glued to a miniscule hole in her dress.

"Was this a regular occurrence?" Tracey asked her, and Casey forced herself to look up at the jury. Some were glaring at Mark, others were watching her uncertainly. Those uncertain ones could cost her the case.

"Yes," she said loudly. "Well, allow me to explain- he only raped me once, but he... he beat me almost every night- whenever he would try to hit Linda, I would try to keep her safe." She blinked back tears, struggling to keep her composure.

Tracey nodded sympathetically, though it was clear to Casey that she wasn't used to handling live victims. "Thank you. Now, can you please tell the court what happened August seventh?"

Casey knew this story would be both longer and harder to tell... but she had to. Shelly was too traumatized to tell what had happened; this was her job. She cleared her throat, then said, "I was in the hospital, because Mark had beaten me in my office. I was pressing charges against him, and Linda and Shelly- his daughter- were in the hospital visiting me and being guarded by one of the hospital's security personnel. Mark called me and told me he had Shelly and gave me the address. He said that he would kill Shelly if I didn't get there within three hours, without any police. I caught a cab- I learned later that he had knocked Linda and the security guard unconscious and had kidnapped Shelly. When the cab finally got me to the warehouse, he was outside, with a gun to Shelly's head. He shot the cab driver so he wouldn't call the police and made me come inside. I was scared for Shelly, so I goaded him, to make him attack me instead of her. I'm not sure how long he was... he was on top of me before the detectives arrived."

But Tracey wasn't used to having live victims to deal with, so she didn't know how to use their testimonies to elicit as much sympathy as possible from the jury. She simply thanked Casey and returned to her table, leaving her at the mercy of Langan- and he knew how to take victim's testimony and twist it to cause doubt and uncertainty in the jury.

"Well, what a sympathetic story, _Ms_. Novak." _Oh,__so__clever,__now__if__I__just__call__you__Trevor__or__Langan,__it__would__seem__impolite._ "You move in with your brother, and then its a hop and a skip to the hospital."

"I didn't hear a question in there, _Mr_. Langan," Casey said softly, then noticed his position- leaning back against his table, so that, to look at him, she had to see Mark. Bastard was using intimidation techniques, what a shock.

Langan smiled slightly and said, "Oh, my mistake. I meant to say, just to recap, your brother beats you every night for no reason at all?" Unlike Tracey's similar question, Trevor's was stated skeptically, like he really didn't believe a word that came out of her mouth.

"Yes. The hospital records are all there. All you have to do is check them, there's your proof."

Shaking his head and clicking his tongue on the roof his mouth, Langan sighed and said, "Tragic, tragic. Tell me, Ms. Novak , why did you move in with your brother in the first place?"

"Objection, relevance?" Casey replied with, knowing exactly what he was trying to do before remembering her place on the witness stand and blushing slightly.

Trevor still caught the opportunity to embarrass her further and said coolly, barely holding back his smile, "You're on the witness stand, you can't object, Ms. Novak." He smiled slightly at her, then, and to anybody else in the courtroom, it would been seen as a polite grin, but to anyone who knew their history, it was obvious he was just rubbing it in.

Casey looked imploring at Tracey, but she must not have put two and two together yet. Sighing in aggravation, Casey ground out, "I went to my brother's house and saw that both Linda and Shelly had injuries. I worked with Linda until she finally trusted me enough to tell me that Mark had abused them and then I moved in with them that same night, so I could keep them safe."

"Really? You just, out of the blue, thought your non-violent brother, had become abusive?"

Casey couldn't answer that, because if she said that ever since he had nearly beat her to death as a child, had known there was a possibility of him becoming abusive to others and had taken it on as her duty to protect his victims and there was no proof of what happened, then the jury would of heard evidence that would of never been allowed into trial. It would be declared a mistrial, giving Langan more time to come up with the perfect way to discredit their case.

Tracey finally understood what he was doing and stood up quickly, asking, "Your Honor, permission to approach?"

The judge hesitated before waving Tracey forward. As close as Casey and Trevor were, they both could hear everything that was said. "Your Honor, the answer to that question would be evidence that has not yet been allowed into this trial. The evidence's nature is as such that would cause a mistrial if the jury heard it."

The judge hesitated again before waving Tracey back and announcing, "Ten minute recess. Counselors, in chambers. Now." Sighing in relief when the judge banged the gavel, Casey leaned back in the chair and rubbed her temples, shaking her head.

"Hey, there," a voice said softly, and she opened her eyes to see Elliot and Olivia standing in front of her, watching her closely. "You're good at this- kicking Langan's ass from either side of the stand."

Casey smiled at Elliot and shrugged. "Thanks. Still, I can't wait until I'm going up against him again as a lawyer."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure you'll kick his ass so hard he won't know what hit him. Do you think he actually thought this strategy would work?"

She shrugged, shaking her head. "No, but he must have thought it was worth a shot... look, there's nothing that I can think of that Langan can say to change this from a sure conviction to an acquittal. I have hospital records, Linda's testimony, the rape kit with his DNA- Mark's not going to walk out of this courtroom without a police escort. And my friends on the parole board may _accidentally_ leak to his fellow inmates that he was a child molester. They don't do well in prison."

Olivia nodded solemnly. "You're right... but... a conviction won't make this all okay, will it?"

Casey sighed and leaned forward, resting her head on her arms and shaking her head. "No. I never thought it would. But Shelly will be safe from her father and... now that it's over... I suppose I'll start over. Fresh."

"You thinking of leaving SVU still?" Elliot asked, leaning up against the witness stand and watching her uncertainly.

The ADA shrugged without lifting her head from her arms. "No, I thought about what you said. You're right. Sex crimes is... it's where I belong. But I was talking about Shelly. I... because I was so afraid of Mark, I never got to know her before this whole mess. Now that he's out of the picture, I can actually get involved in the poor kid's life. I know I sound like I'm describing the Hallmark family right now, but it's for lack of a better word. I... after he raped me, when I was fifteen, I had a pregnancy scare. Ended up being a false alarm, but I... I've wanted to be a mother, ever since then. Both to prove David wrong when he said I'd make a horrible one and because... I do want kids. Shelly seems like a nice place to start." 

Elliot grimaced when he was reminded of what David had said about his only daughter. "I'm sure you'd make a great mother, Casey," he said softly. "As strange as it sounds for a father to be saying this, don't listen to your father. I've seen sociopaths with better parenting skills than him."

They all chuckled at that before looking up as the judge walked back inside and called the court room to order. Elliot and Olivia wished her luck before returning to their seats as Casey was sworn in again.

As she had predicted, Langan didn't have any other real strategy to get a conviction, and she had been through a lot worse things than his vicious questions. She managed to keep her composure as she had when she was a kid- whenever he asked a particularly painful question, one that made her want to scream at him, she scraped her teeth harshly and slowly over her tongue. It would hurt like hell later, but it kept her from lashing out and helped her answer his questions semi-calmly. The grueling testimony took almost an hour of Langan going through practically every hospital visit and beating until she had finally been allowed to step down. The judge had adjourned court for the day and Elliot and Olivia had came with her to Linda's place. Elliot took Kathy home while Olivia stayed with the Novaks and assisted in their ways to distract the young girl- Kathy had accidently turned on the news, where the Novak case had been covered for the past week. Casey watched as the Linda and Olivia chased Shelly around the house, shouting and laughing, and thought back on what she had told Elliot.

Yeah, being Shelly's aunt was a nice place to start.

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	15. Chapter 15

Final chapter. Sorry, there won't be a sequel.

**Chapter 15**

Casey didn't stay at the courthouse the day of closing arguments. She didn't want to be there when she saw her brother taken to prison for crimes she still felt were her fault. Instead, she offered to be Shelly's babysitter and asked Linda to call her when they got the verdict back. She didn't expect the jury to take days to deliberate, like they did for some of her cases.

"Aunt Casey!" the tiny tornado exclaimed as she collided with her, hugging her left leg tightly. "Hi!"

"Hi, there," she said with a smile, reaching down to ruffle her niece's hair. "How're you doing?"

Shelly let go of her leg, taking a step back and pouting. "I'm so bored! Mama won't let me watch TV ever since Ms. Kathy was here, and she's so sad all the time now!"

Casey sighed sympathetically, knowing Linda was probably simply preoccupied with the trial and was about to say so when she remembered how old Shelly was and, instead, got slowly and painfully down to the floor, holding out her arm as she put her crutches to the side. Shelly curled up against her side and Casey stood up again, her ribs burning in protest as she held Shelly close. "Well, that's because Mama is stuck listening to boring adult stuff all day. But that's no fun. What do you say we do some fun kid stuff, huh?"

"Yay!" Shelly exclaimed, wrapping her arms tighter around Casey's neck and leaning her head on her shoulder. "You're awesome! Most adults are no fun at all, but you and Livvie and Elliot and Ms. Kathy are all the best!"

Casey smiled as she sat down on the couch, still holding Shelly. "Aw, really? That's sweet, Shelly. Hey, did Mama ever tell you that I play on a softball team?"

Shelly's eyes widened in excitement and she turned to stare at Casey eagerly. "No, she didn't! I play baseball too! That's awesome!"

"Really? You score a homerun yet?" Casey asked, smiling down at her niece.

Shelly nodded proudly. "Uhuh! Couple weeks ago!" she exclaimed excitably, the little girl's eyes shining, making her seem as sweet and innocent as most others her age.

Clapping her hands together, Casey smiled proudly at Shelly and said, "That's great, Shelly! Five years old, and you already got your first homerun. You got a career ahead of you, kid. Got your baseball gene from me, did you? You make the Novak family proud."

Shelly curled up against Casey and nuzzled her head into her side. She didn't notice the ADA wince slightly and put a hand to her ribs, and Casey stifled the whimper and started stroking her hair softly. "You're awesome. Can you help me practice baseball sometime?"

Smiling again, Casey nodded and said, "Yeah, of course! I can teach you to throw one mean curve ball and you'll be able to hit every ball that gets thrown your way." Shelly's resulting smile was small and childlike, and Casey grinned as well and rubbed her ribs gently, trying to soothe the ache that only painkillers and sleep could really make disappear. "Hey, Shelly, Mama told me she woke up late and didn't have time to fix you breakfast this morning- so, what do you want? I can cook. Sort of. Kind of. Well, I can try."

"Hmm... pancakes! I love pancakes!" Casey grimaced- she could cook eggs, boil water, and pop waffles in the toaster and pizzas in the oven. That was the absolute extent of her culinary abilities.

"All right, then, we're going to Ihop if you want an edible breakfast," Casey said, smiling down at Shelly as she got to her feet.

Shelly jumped up as well and exclaimed, "Yay! Mama never takes me out for breakfast! I can't wait!"

Casey chuckled and then pointed up the stairs to Shelly's room. "Good. Now, go upstairs and get your coat. It's cold outside!" Shelly nodded and scampered up to her room while Casey fished around in her pocket for her vicodin. Shelly was a welcome distraction from her rape, which she had already realized it wasn't going to be any easier to deal with simply because he'd raped her before. The little girl was bubbly and energetic, a sharp contrast to the nervous, silent child she'd seen three months ago. Casey had always been shy when she was a child, getting more and more outgoing as she got older, and she had rarely been good with kids- it seemed Shelly was the exception.

When the little girl bounded down the stairs again, Casey grabbed her crutches and stood up, limping towards the door. "All right, Shelly, let's go. This way, your mother won't get mad at me for giving you food poisoning with my terrible cooking."

Shelly smiled and laughed as she skipped down to Casey's rental, which was parked in the drive way- she had gotten a car after breaking her leg, knowing she wouldn't be able to bike anywhere for a while. Driving a car again made her remember why she had stopped in the first place- drivers in New York sucked. She had almost gotten in three car crashes already, and it was only her fourth week behind the wheel.

Casey drove down to the nearest Ihop, trying not to shout at the bastard who cut her off, mindful there was a little five year old in the car. She would discover the joys of driving in ten or so years, no reason for her to get depressed about it now. Her temper got the best of her, but she managed to begin swearing in Spanish instead of English. "_Tu__hijo__de__puta!"_ She shouted at him, slamming her fist down on the horn.

Shelly looked up at her in surprise. "Huh?" she asked after a moment, and Casey blushed before glancing at Shelly and shaking her head at her in the mirror.

"Um, please don't tell your mother I said that, and please don't repeat it. It's not a nice word."

"Like the ones Daddy called Mama? I asked her what they meant what once and she said they were bad and not to say them."

The words were spoken in that little girl voice, but their content was such that Shelly was far too young to have been exposed to. Casey swallowed hard and nodded at Shelly in the mirror. "Yeah. Like those," she said softly, trying to smile. Shaking that thought of her mind as best she could, Casey led Shelly inside, keeping a protective hand around hers and searching for any distraction she could.

"Coke!" Shelly exclaimed when their waiter asked for their drink orders.

Casey gave her a sharp look before turning back to their waiter and saying, "We'll both take water." After he walked away, she shook her head at Shelly, still smiling, "Shelly, coke, at nine in the morning? I don't think so. I'm here to look after you, not feed you candy and sweets!"

"But... but Mama lets me eat candy all day long!" she exclaimed hopefully, and Casey chuckled but shook her head.

"Oh, does she now?" Casey asked knowingly, shaking her head as she listened to Shelly's exuberant tales of candy all day long- ice cream for breakfast, cake for lunch, and chocolate for dinner.

Shelly was still regaling her with stories about candy when their waiter returned for what they wanted to eat and, eventually, with their food. It was then that he narrowed his eyes, looking over Casey and Shelly uncertainly before he gasped, "You're the Novaks! You're the sister, and she's the daughter!"

Glancing protectively at Shelly, Casey turned her glare onto their poor waiter and snapped, "Yeah, we are. You got something to say about it?"

The stupid teenager didn't realize the warning in her voice and nodded eagerly. "Yeah- you guys are famous! You're all my law professor will talk about! Can I have your autographs?"

Casey didn't want Shelly to get this kind of mindset about what her father had done- that it was something to be proud of, that it made you famous, to be related to a rapist, but she could have a discussion with her later. "Depends- will you go away if I say yes?"

The waiter nodded quickly, still smiling widely, and Casey vaguely wondered how sad his life had to be before grabbing a napkin and signing her name. "There!" she exclaimed, handing it to him. "You happy?"

He shook his head, pointing at Shelly. "No, no, I want hers, too!"

"For god's sakes, she's five years old! Can't you-"

"Aunt Casey!" Shelly interrupted, pouting. "I wanna give him an autograph! Can I, can I, can I?"

Casey sighed, knowing this wasn't really a good idea before deciding to give in. "Sure, Shelly," she said, patting her shoulder and sending another fierce glare in the waiter's direction. After Shelly had sloppily scrawled her name with a backwards E and K, Casey shoved the napkin back at the waiter and said pointedly, "_Bye_." Grinning widely, the waiter hurried off, still clutching the napkin tightly.

Shaking her head sadly, Casey picked at her food, her appetite gone. She popped a vicodin in her mouth when Shelly wasn't looking and stirred the ice in her water, watching it clink together. People were always recognizing her from the news as 'that lawyer on that rape case', but she was rarely approached and no one had ever asked for her autograph before, something Casey preferred to what had just happened. It wasn't good for Shelly to start thinking that what her father had done was worthy of being famous. That anything about this situation was good.

Casey decided to wait until they got in the car for her to try and explain it to the little girl. She paid the check and practically threw it at the moron with the sad life before heading out the door, Shelly on her heels. As soon as she had started the engine, she said, "Shelly, I need to talk to you about something... it's that waiter who wanted our autographs."

"I know!" she gushed. "Wasn't it cool?"

Casey really didn't want to spoil that sweet excitement in the young child's eyes, but she sighed quietly and said, "Well, Shelly, to tell you the truth... not really. See, that waiter only knew who we were and wanted our autographs because of something your father did. Specifically, because your father hit me, you, and your mother."

Shelly frowned, swinging her legs back and forth on the car seat and staring at Casey in confusion. "Huh? I don't get it. Why would we be famous 'cause of Daddy?"

Casey hesitated, trying to find a way to explain it. "Well, to put Daddy in jail for hurting us, he has to have a trial, where someone defends him and someone tries to show why he's guilty, then twelve people and a judge decide whether he's guilty or innocent. And your Daddy's trial happens to be getting a lot of publicity, which means reporters and news stations are very interested in it. And the reporters don't just talk about your father, they talk about you, your mother, even me as well. So we're kind of like celebrities, but only because your father hurt us. Is that what you want to be known for?"

Shelly still didn't get it- not that Casey blamed her. It wasn't exactly logical. "But I don't understand- why would someone think we're famous just because Daddy hit us?"

Casey really didn't like how causally she talked about being hit by her father, but Shelly was still too young have really processed what he had done for her. Swallowing back that response, she said instead, "Because people don't often make much sense, sweetheart. Look, I can't make you promise not to sign any more autographs or anything, but I don't want you to start thinking about this as a good thing. If you're gonna be famous, it should be for something _you_ did, that was good, not for something your father did that was very, very bad."

Shelly sighed, still staring at her uncertainly. "I, uh... I get it. I think..."

Casey could tell Shelly was sad that her aunt was telling her new-found fame wasn't good for her, but Casey didn't want to give her the patented parent line, 'You'll understand when you're older.' Even though it was true in this case, she knew how much it would annoy Shelly to use it on her, so Casey said quickly, "Hey, when we get home, how about I get you some chocolate? We don't even have to tell your mother!"

That perked Shelly up immediately. "Really? Yay!" she cried happily, clapping her hands together, and Casey could barely conceal her smile. The fact that Shelly could seem so innocent after what her father had done made her proud, because she had kept Shelly safe from the bulk of the abuse. That had been the whole point, after all.

SVUSVUSVU

Shelly had been asleep for the past half hour when there was a knock at the door. Casey brushed a strand of hair out of Shelly's closed eyes before standing up and making her way to the door, where Linda and Olivia were waiting for her- damn. She had turned her phone off when Shelly had fallen asleep. "Shelly's in there," she told Linda, jacking her thumb over her shoulder, and the woman quickly went inside, leaving the ADA and detective alone.

"Well?" Casey asked nervously, feeling her stomach twist so tightly it was as if she might throw up. "What happened?"

Olivia smiled at her. "The jury came back... it's a conviction, Casey. Guilty on all counts." The detective wrapped her arms tightly around the ADA, pulling her close as tears brimmed Casey's eyes.

It was over. It was finally over.

Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I hope you enjoyed it!


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